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Sam2707
22-10-12, 09:21
Hi,

This is my first post on here, I am looking for a little support or understanding. I am at a very low point this morning. About a month ago an incident triggered severe anxiety about being contaminated and that my contamination was affecting others, this got out of hand and I have been off work for several weeks now. I was just about getting these thoughts under control when I was hit with something new, what if I have HIV! I have been feeling run down recently, sore throat, tiredness etc. Now I must confess I went off the rails a bit when I was younger, I was not the most careful. I am not proud of this, quite the opposite in fact. I made the huge mistake of heading for Dr Google! My symptoms (also had itching all over with a rash on my chest) told me I could have numerous things wrong with me, including HIV. That was it for me, i'm convinced.
I also found on google that anxiety can cause the itching, tiredness, sore throat. I really hope that is it. I am going for a HIV test this afternoon, not sure I can cope with the stress while waiting for the results. I am not on here looking for a diagnosis, just looking for a friend who understands.

Thanks for reading,

Sam

Devyn
22-10-12, 09:23
Hi,

This is my first post on here, I am looking for a little support or understanding. I am at a very low point this morning. About a month ago an incident triggered severe anxiety about being contaminated and that my contamination was affecting others, this got out of hand and I have been off work for several weeks now. I was just about getting these thoughts under control when I was hit with something new, what if I have HIV! I have been feeling run down recently, sore throat, tiredness etc. Now I must confess I went off the rails a bit when I was younger, I was not the most careful. I am not proud of this, quite the opposite in fact. I made the huge mistake of heading for Dr Google! My symptoms (also had itching all over with a rash on my chest) told me I could have numerous things wrong with me, including HIV. That was it for me, i'm convinced.
I also found on google that anxiety can cause the itching, tiredness, sore throat. I really hope that is it. I am going for a HIV test this afternoon, not sure I can cope with the stress while waiting for the results. I am not on here looking for a diagnosis, just looking for a friend who understands.

Thanks for reading,

Sam

The things you are describing is seeming like you looked up HIV Infection, as in, within a few weeks of you getting HIV. unless you've had sex in the last few weeks or within a month, unprotected, with a stranger, you don't have HIV. I have an irrational AIDS fear and i'm telling you you're fine. God bless.

Sam2707
22-10-12, 09:33
That is reassuring to hear. If I was infected it would have been more than 5 years ago. I did the usual thing of typing in my symptoms and believing whatever the google told me. Still anxious, guess that is normal though. It is good to chat with someone who has the same anxiety, I have felt really alone with this.

Sam

Devyn
22-10-12, 10:08
That is reassuring to hear. If I was infected it would have been more than 5 years ago. I did the usual thing of typing in my symptoms and believing whatever the google told me. Still anxious, guess that is normal though. It is good to chat with someone who has the same anxiety, I have felt really alone with this.

Sam

you're definitely not alone. 5 years, you're at no risk. Stop worrying :yesyes:

we're here if you ever need help. please PM me if you ever feel really anxious, god bless, get better!

sparkle_1979
22-10-12, 12:22
I convinced myself I had aids. I didn't, ur symptoms are prob. Cold, health anxiety symptoms or something just as harmless. Glad ur getting tested so you can see that big fat negative x

justina
22-10-12, 12:42
After 5 years with an undiagnosed HIV-infection I think you would have aids by now. As others told you, the symtoms you describe are the ones that come shortly after you catch the virus.

Aids is something different, it is your immune system breaking down completely and you get very very ill. So it's good that you had the test, everyone should I think, but don't worry about the result, it will definitely be negative!

(I have taken HIV-tests myself, and during pregnancy they always test you, and I know how scary it is...!)

Sam2707
25-10-12, 09:01
Hi All,

Thanks for your replies, got the results today which were negative as everyone said they would be.

Sam

MoonlightFire
25-10-12, 14:43
Hi Sam

I'm really sorry to hear you are experiencing such horrible anxiety. I can completely relate. I was terrified of HIV for years. I was diagnosed with health anxiety (I had worried about other illnesses obsessively too before the HIV fear) and given anti-depressants which lessened the worry but every so often the fear came back with avengance. I have only ever been at very very low risk but my mind just over analysed everything and kept coming up with the same conclusion...with the help of the dreaded Google!!!

In the end, with a lot of support from friends, family and this wonderful forum, I went for a rapid HIV test and it came back negative. Since then my life has completely changed...no more intense panic, no more intense anxiety. At last I'm calm! You are absolutely doing the right thing getting the test - I found that it was the only thing that could allay my fears. You will feel so proud of yourself for doing it!

If you want to chat about this in PM please feel free to drop me a line :)

Moonlight Xxx

---------- Post added at 14:43 ---------- Previous post was at 14:41 ----------

Ah, sorry, I didn't read your last message! Well done for going through with the test and so pleased it all came back clear. :)

Sam2707
29-10-12, 21:37
Feeling somewhat better since the negative result, still got some way to go with the general health anxiety problems. Seeing a therapist and trying to find a way to deal with worries and thoughts that just pop into my head. Feeling more positive though, can see light at the end of the tunnel. Thanks for all the support.

Sam