exposure teatment for fear of death

[trish1955]

just sat thinking about cbt wich i have tried in the past along with all diffrent therapies and still here with fear of death still pretty much the ruler of how i lived my life wich i may add feel like i lived in a fog for obout 40yrs since it first became my fear at the age of 12 now 57 i thought alot of phobias to be cured the use of exposure treatment how could you be exposed to this fear i thought maybe when relatives die and you go see them to pay repect that would be it but nope i no i saw my dad when he died and it didnt lesson my fear at all just a thought does any one no how sorry about my spelling not the sharpest pencil in the box take care all

[pollyanna]

trish, i am the same fear, a phobia really, and like you for years i have wondered how this could be helped. it will be interesting to see if anyone else has found something really helpful.

[trish1955]

yes it will i have thought about it many times hope some one can tell me cus trust me i would try it would give anything to be normal what ever normal maybe lol trish

[trish1955]

seems like none of us have the answer to my question never mind back to wondering take care all

[thetube82]

hi trish and polly,

i dont think you could treat a fear of dying in the same way you could treat a 'normal' phobia with exposure!!

I think the best way to treat this type of fear is to treat it in a similar way you might treat 'worry', for example accepting that you are going to die so what is the benefit to worrying about it??....... nothing!, it wont prevent it, it wont slow it down, etc., therefore find the understanding that spending your whole life worrying about something that will happen is a bit of a waste of time and it might be better to let the worry go and enjoy life instead!!

hope that makes a bit of sense!!

thetube82

[Sparkle1984]

With regards to letting go of worries, you may find this workbook helpful: http://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/docs/ACF1097.pdf It has some good advice about how to let go of your worries. I have this fear of dying as well, but it has improved in the last few weeks as I've been learning new CBT techniques such as how to let go.

[miss polly]

I have a fear of dying as well. I guess that's at the route of my health anxiety. I don't know what the answer is. I'm 51 now and it's got worse with each passing year. The problem is getting older means death is nearer and there's more chance of ill health. I try to take thetube82's approach and accept it's all inevitable and what will be will be. Sometimes that works and other times it doesn't and I'm paralyzed with fear and panic. I think it all comes down to being a sensitive person and thinking too deeply about things. I can't change that, it's who I am. I wish I was a thick skinned person with the hide of a rhino, but I'm not. I can't read the news without crying! I try to live for the day which is all any of us have xx

[trish1955]

thanks for yr replies found the intresting yeah yr right about being sensitve so am i i wish i could just think well we all have to die i think it how that can be scarey and what your leaving behind to just wish i could come to terms wih it and live foe today its awfull to think its ruled my life and limitted to what i have achieved sad really any way thanks and take care all

[ElizabethJane]

Hi I'm new to this but I have a fear of the actual process of dying. I can't really go into the why but I would like a dignified death. If I know I am suffering from a terminal illness then I shall write a 'living will'. I want to be free from pain and intubed so that I don't choke on my own saliva- preferably in a hospice. I have recurring dreams about death. It isn't what lies afterwards but the actual process. I am a Christian so I have no worries about the afterlife. I have had hypnosis and tried relaxation cps and they all help. The problems with sleep and dying whilst asleep still remain though.EJ.

[Tessar]

OMG miss polly, i feel exactly like you! i have found it hard to get thoughts of the future and of getting old, dying etc out of my head (i'm 49). i have other issues going on and am trying to deal with those; i think that the fixation on death comes as a result of other stuff going on. i have tried switching my focus to dealing with these other things and that has lessened by far how long or how many times i might think about death. i must have improved because i could never had used the word "death" til now, i'd have been paranoid that just saying it would make it happen. my counsellor is trying to encourage me to think of "making the most of life" rather than thinking it's over already & the inevitable is there looming at me, i.e turning it on it's head. i do want to do that. i almost wish for a "life-changing" experience to make me feel that way. it's just that some things hang heavy in my mind and that i believe is why i ruminate about this whole death thing.