Scared of birth

[hunny]

Hi all

I am 35 weeks pregnant and terrified of giving birth

I have the most awful ectopics throughout my pregnancy which have increased dramatically in the last few weeks.
Im convinced i have a heart prob,my heart rate is about 100bpm even when resting,im scared im gonna die in labour
Im due to have a holter monitor,am waiting for the appointment
I have a heart murmur which they discovered over a year ago,they said it was ok but im not sure,i feel so exhaustd and my chest really hurts,not good signs,plus my Dr says the murmur is much louder now

Sorry to go on,im scared witless!![V]

Hunny x

[juju]

hi
is it your first baby?
its natural to worry about it if its your first even if its second/third etc.
im sure your health is fine its just the anxiety, many people have murmurs and they live long and full happy lives. try to relax and enjoy the remainder, thats the best bit, before all the night feeds ha ha
take care now
juju

we are all stronger people after having this

[lass]

Hi,

Please don't be scared. I'm the biggest wimp in the world, and I've had 2 babies, so if I can get through it, anyone can.

Don't know if you will find this reassuring or not, but once you are in labour you will really not be worrying about anything - your body will just take over and you will be focused on getting that baby out! You will be well looked after when you are giving birth, you and the baby will be monitored to check you are both doing okay.

Try to enjoy your last few weeks and get lots of rest.

Caroline
xx

[eeyorelover]

Hi Hunny -
I've had 4 kids and everytime I got to around 30 weeks or so I was terrified of something happening!!! I even had dreams that scared the crap out of me - don't really want to go into detail as you are worrying enough without the details of that - lol
Every pregnant woman has the fear of birth. After all it puts us in a very vunerable position (LITERALLY) and we don't have any control over what is happening to our bodies during birth.
I can tell you a few things that helped my last 2 births go much smoother than the first 2.
Know what you want before you go into the hospital as far as if you are going to have natural childbirth or if you want pain meds. I went for the epidural and I can tell you that it was GREAT for me.
Take in some 'homey' things like your fav blanket or pillow. Anything that is going to make you more comfortable.
And last but not least - this is your birth - your baby - your experience. Do whatever makes you comfortable.
You're going to do just great :)

I have a murmer too and mine was louder during all my pregnancies and my doc said that he had seen that alot and it was nothing to worry about.
I hope that helps :)

Oh and by the way - EARLY CONGRATS ON THE NEW BABY :)
xxx
Sandy

[vernon]

Hi hunny, it’s not the same but I have had no kids. My wife had them instead. But I can really relate to what you are going through, I had eye surgery 18 months ago witch I put of for years because of fears, I was fully, yes 100% sure I was going to die of heart attack from the fear and bad palpitations before or during the surgery, but this is so normal for people with bad anxiety. Let us all know how you get on and I am sure everything will be fine. Take care. Vernon

[marie ross]

Hi Hunny

I was exactly the same as you when i was pregnant - scared witless!!!

But when i went into labour - the fear disappears and you just concentrate on getting the baby out. It's hard to explain but your mind just goes blank and you don't really notice whats happening around you, all your energy will be going into giving birth.

With my first i had an epidural - blooming marvelous things!!!!

But it could'nt of been that bad, because less than a year later i did it all again!!!!

Good luck to you and your new baby - you'll do great.

Take care.

Marie XXX

[Peru83]

Hi honey, have you considered a C-Section? Explain your worries to your G.P and see what he says. I am confident tho that you g.p wouldn't be letting you go through with the labour if he thought this heart mumer was of concern. If he is aware of all of this then I'm sure he wouldn't do anything to put you or your baby at risk. Wouldn't be worth his job for a start, let alone his conscience. I'm sure you will be fine.:)

Take Carexx

Claire

P.S What you having, boy or girl?:D



onwards and upwards

[Coni]

Hi Honey,

Claires right, your doctors wouldnt let you go through labour if they thought it would put you or your baby at risk. Its quite common for heart murmurs to become more noticeable during pregnancy (in some women this is when they are first discovered). I've had ectopic heart beats for years and they did get noticeably worse with my pregnancys and like you I was scared witless, but I've had 3 children and we've all lived to tell the tale lol! I think its natural that all your fears and worries seem amplified at this time....its also a fear of the unknown. I was a midwife when I had my youngest two and I was still terrified lol!

Why dont you discuss your fears with your midwife or doctor and let them reassure you. Take control of as much as you can (within reason) eg have you visited the hospital, seen the delivery rooms and equipment etc? get your bag ready so you feel organised and thats one less thing to worry about, make sure theres petrol in the car.

I know this is a scary time but its exciting too....just think in a few weeks your going to meet your new baby!

Good luck ,you'll do great! Let us know how you get on and if you want to chat feel free to pm me.

Coni X

[jackie]

hunny i have had five kids and one of them was a twin birth. believe me the horror stories you hear are just not real or i would not have went through it four times

have they mentioned a section? if they think you can give birth naturally then they are unconcerned about the strength of your heart. trust them, i really love antenatal carers as they are so dedicated and will not put you or your baby at risk. so your heart must be in good order.

your heart rate is faster naturally because it is working for two healthy people. during my twin pregnancy mine went to 130 bpm and i was told that was normal. ive had two further pregnancies since then and have had a faster heart rate. as soon as the baby is born it goes back to normal

also i had bad ectopics and chest pain throughout my pregnancies and got through them all.

you will too!

if you have any fears just go to your maternaty hospital and tell them what you are experiencing. they can do an ecg and will because they are protecting you and your wee precious baby. get peace of mind even if it means going to your hospital and then try to enjoy the rest of your pregnancy, just remember in a few weeks you will hold a wee angel in your arms and feel love like youve never felt it before

i have went on , sorry

good luck

jackie

[hunny]

Hi
Thanks so much al of you for taking the time to reply
I wish i could feel normal and well and just not so scared all the time

Thanks again,i really appreciate it
Love
Hunny x

[**whenwillthisend**]

hunny just to add to the other replie you are going to be fine when you do go into labour all your worries will be forgotten and all you will be concentrating on is getting the baby out! i too have a heart murmur but its nothing to be worried about if the doctors were worried you would have found out by now, a cardiologist told me the only reason i needed to know is so if a doctor tells me, did i know i had a murmur, i can say yes i know, but ive been checked out and its nothing! 1 in 10 people have a murmur!
You are bound to feel exhausted you are nearly full term, so put your feet up and relax(something you wont get much of when the baby arrives)
and remember labour pain is forgotten, thats why we go on to have more babies!!! good luck