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jumpwomble
01-11-12, 16:04
Hi everyone,

I started posting here because of my anxiety over a bout of what appears to be otitis externa but I've been having anxiety issues for quite some time now, so I thought I'd just write an introductory post. Thanks for reading this! :)

I have lived in the UK for a little over a decade now, I moved here for work and then met my partner and have stayed since. My family are all abroad and at times, it gets pretty hard going and lonely as I have always been extremely close to my family.

My anxiety issues started in my early 30s when I started having a series of minor (but irritating) health problems; before that, I was always more or less like everyone else, possibly with a slightly pessimistic view of life and a melancholic disposition but nothing too bad.

I can't think of one incident which triggered my health anxiety but I think it may be related to some on-going weird, dizziness issues that I repeatedly went to the GP for. They did all sorts of tests and began telling me it was all in my head, when I knew there was something wrong. I even got sent to various ENT specialists who told me various things and that it would eventually get better on its own. It didn't. I learned to cope with it for a couple of years but it was tough and whittling away at my emotional reserves. Eventually, I worked out that the root of my problems was extremely tight/sore neck and shoulder muscles caused by my line of work (at the computer). I went to a physio and everything was sorted out, but I think that left me with less faith than ever in my GPs. I RARELY ever went to the GP but whenever I did, they wouldn't usually be able to help me. :weep:

Naturally through the years, it got worse - whenever I experienced some irritating symptom or other, the GP wouldn't help, and I'd have to somehow get to the bottom of it myself by endless internet searches, etc. I think I've driven my partner up the wall because of it! And on the internet, of course, you can find all sorts of conditions, ranging from common to rare, and that is a very, very dangerous thing with a mind like mine! :huh:

So now, whenever I experience some "odd" symptom (I don't get anxiety over ALL health issues, only some... usually the vague but irritating ones that could have multiple causes), I focus on it obsessively... to the point of having insomnia at night! I spoke to my GP once about it and it was suggested that I visited a private counsellor for CBT to handle my anxiety, but it was really too expensive. :(

So here I am!

jumpy

nomorepanic
01-11-12, 16:16
Hi jumpwomble

We just wanted to welcome you aboard to NMP. We hope you enjoy your stay here and get all the support and advice you need.

Please take some time to read the website articles on the left as well for loads of advice and tips.

mollymalloy
01-11-12, 17:28
Hi and welcome to this site and forum, I have found it a great help and hope you do too.:welcome:

Sparkle1984
01-11-12, 19:07
Welcome to the forums! :) Here in the UK, CBT is available for free on the national health service, although there will probably be a waiting list for it.

jumpwomble
02-11-12, 11:32
I haven't been put on a waiting list for CBT. Hmmm.... It might be an idea, even when I am not feeling anxious about any particular health issue, because something might come up again eventually.

I don't think I'm hypochrondriac, in the sense that I don't imagine my symptoms nor do I think I've possibly got everything under the sun. However what I do is that I tend to catastrophise (is that a word?) my symptoms and think of the worst possible outcomes. Even when the possibilities are very remote, I seem to think they are quite realistic! People point out to me that I am irrational, but it doesn't seem irrational or crazy to me in the least bit.

I read the main article on Health Anxiety here and agreed heartily with most of it. A lot of the media seems hell-bent on sensationalising health issues and sometimes misinterpreting medical data and unleashing it on us, the untrained and slightly neurotic. ;) There has been an explosion of interest in alternative medicine and a corresponding decrease of trust in conventional medicine, I find, especially for "tricky" conditions such as allergies or odd symptoms etc. which a lot of GPs CAN be dismissive about. I think this might trigger off health anxiety in a lot of us, i.e the feeling we can no longer trust or rely on our doctors to keep us healthy.

And yet it is true to say that many of us have had bad experiences with dismissive, incompetent or downright bad doctors.... I have had my share of them, and I can say that they have shaped my health anxiety more than anything else in my background! I have got to the point when I often dismiss what my GP tells me/reassures me about, and assume that specialists, consultants etc. won't have a clue how to help me.

:(

jumpy

Serenitie
04-11-12, 13:22
:welcome: You will receive a lot of support on here

ricardo
04-11-12, 19:26
Hi jumpy.
read the left hand side bar there are many alternatives for help and of course the good people on here.