View Full Version : Trying so hard to be positive
I am trying to only focus on positives but just feel like I am going further back. I don't even know if it is anxiety or depression now. I just can't stop crying. In reality I have so much to be happy about but feel so sad and unhappy. Just don't feel like I have a purpose in life any more and I didn't think I would ever say that.:weep::weep::weep:
Aw, I feel for you. I felt like this over the summer and it was really hard. I went into my counselors every week and just asked what the point of it all was. She suggested an anti-depressant for me, which really helped. But that could just be my situation.
Are you seeing a counselor or therapist? I hate that feeling, like you are stuck and can't get out. I felt like a huge weight was on my back all the time.
I hope you feel better :hugs:
Aw Annie, I really think you need to see the doctor, I know ssri in the past was bad for you but perhaps it's time to try a new one, big hugs xxx
I agree with Laura Annie; I think maybe you should see your GP again and see if she can help you, even if it's just until you bounce back a little x
I start my cbt on Wednesday...I just don't know what to do with myself. I have tried to do some housework, been out for a walk but had to come back because I was getting so panicky and just sitting here crying and feeling so useless.
Ditto! I think you should see your doctor too Annie. I don't know much about meds but maybe Laura is right. Talking it over might make you feel better - and you know we are here for you too. :flowers::bighug1:xx
I am scared to change my meds as last time I tried they made me worse and I had to go back to the others. I also would have to stop taking the ones I take now for a couple of weeks before I can take new ones.
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Thank you all of you for being there for me I really appreciate it :hugs:
Please Annie, phone you doctor, this blip is lasting too long and you are not getting any better, it is also a fact that cbt has a higher success rate when combined with ssri, I know you are scared hunni but really if you are honest with yourself right now you couldn't feel much worse than you already do, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. I never believed I could feel so much better on ssris as all the others I took made me feel dreadful too but this one now really has worked. Please phone the doctor xxx
I will phone, I have to get this sorted. I had a couple of emails from some of my students as they were expecting me back today and I feel like I am letting them down. This is one of them:
hi miss are you ok when are you coming back please tell me because i would like to know because i miss you mister sainder's said that you are not back till next year i do not believe him.
Another one said she is crying because she is missing me.
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I have also just realised that I forgot to take one of my tablets this morning so that won't help :doh:
That's so sweet but don't let it guilt you Annie, you are not ready to go back yet. Come on, be proactive with your recovery, pick up that phone and take a step forward, what you are doing has not been working, it's absolutely time to try sonething else. I honestly think it's depression now as well as anxiety and you need a hand to pull yourself out x
That's so sweet but don't let it guilt you Annie, you are not ready to go back yet. Come on, be proactive with your recovery, pick up that phone and take a step forward, what you are doing has not been working, it's absolutely time to try sonething else. I honestly think it's depression now as well as anxiety and you need a hand to pull yourself out x
What she said!! :yesyes:
They have no appointments until next Tuesday but I can phone tomorrow morning for an emergency one.
What she said too. Do it Annie - Laura is starting to scare me :scared15:!!! xx
I know I am worrying about my occupational health assessment on Friday as well.
Do that then Annie, get an emergency appointment. You are doing the right thing. I tried Prozac, fluoxetine, citalopram and cipramil on the past and none agreed with me but sertraline has been fantastic, I was so scared to take them too but I knew I was at a Point I had to try something. Sertraline is apparently the least likely to have a bad effect, that's what my doctor said. X
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Lol @ meche x
I will ask him about it, but because I am on tricylics ath the moment, they would have to be out of my system before I can try new ones.
It can only get better Annie, you have zero quality of life right now, if the road is tough to start for the first few days you have the most wonderful supportive hubby and we are all here to help you along, you could be feeling back to yourself by Xmas, isn't that a nice thought? :) xx
We'll all be with you in spirit tomorrow Annie (not to sound stalky or anything!!)
Pmsl
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She can do this cant she girls!!!!!!
I would have to go through the withdrawal of My current meds then 2 weeks of none before I could take SSRI's and that scares me and is why my doctor is reluctant to change. Maybe I should just speak to him about increasing my current meds as I am only taking a low dose.
Yes you could try an increase, but you need to do something, all this crying and fear is making you ill xx
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What is your medication called?
Perhaps just discuss meds generally with him Annie, and see what options you have. Mke sure he understands that you feel that your current type/dose is no longer working as well as it shuld though x
(sorry for typos - I'm typing with a lump of brie in one hand!!)
((you wait until I start my crisps in a minute and then see how bad my typing gets!!!))
Yes agree with Leah, I think sometimes the dose we are on just stops working and am increase is necessary. I love Brie, I want it!!!!!!
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My appetite has returned and I can't stop scoffing, need to get a grip!
I take Dosulipin but only taking 75mg at the moment. I also have Chlordazipoxide for when things gets really bad. I started taking those again just 5mg each morning (and I forgot it this morning!) The doctor has told me I can take 3 of those each day but have only taken 1. When I first started on Dosulipin I was taking 125mg so I know I can up the dose but wanted to try to manage without doing that (which I obviously can't). Thank you ladies you are the best and I really appreciate your support. :bighug1:
You don't need to thank us, that's why we are all here, we all need a bit of support sometimes, I just can't wait to see you feeling a bit brighter. X
Me too (on the brie issue). My herblist told me i cold eat as much cheese as i wanted to help my digestion/put weight on, so I'm happy as a pig in whatsit :)
p.s. told you my typing would get worse when i started the crisps!
Glad you are listening to your chums :) x
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I have 2 stone to lose for my sisters wedding next summer, I am matron of honour and I don't want to look like a big pig in a frock so I need to wire my jaws I think! X
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Hubby was nights last night and instead of going to bed he has crashed on the sofa which means I can't get my housework done grrrrrrr
I have phoned doctors again and waiting for doctor to phone me back x
Ok, I've finished eating so I can type sensibly with both hands now. Annie you know that I don't know a lot of anything about meds, but why don't you try taking 2, or even 3 of the 5mg ones today if your Dr has said you can, just to see if they make a difference? Just because you take 2 today, doesn't mean you will have to take 2 tomorrow, but you may feel better, and you will at least be able to report back to your Dr about how much additional support you think they're providing.
Annie make sure and tell him how bad it has really been!!! Xxx
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I think it's the antidepressants that you need to increase x
Annie make sure and tell him how bad it has really been!!! Xxx
Yes, don't try to appear better than you are. I have been guilty of this for years, and in fact I still laugh when I think of once when an ex-boyfriend said to thin air (when I was unable to say what I really meant/wanted to) "Excuse me, Mr Bush. We'll be out of your way in a moment when Leah stops beating around you." :roflmao:
I'm so glad I'm not the only one scoffing for Britain! Honestly girls - I haven't stopped eating for 2 weeks. I can feel the weight piling on. It's comfort eating so I've vowed once my scan is over and done tomorrow I'm back to healthy eating and running!
Annie; you've absolutely done the right thing :yesyes:! xx
I have just taken the one I forgot this morning. I know it is my stupid foot that has got me in this state and worrying about my son. x
Meche hurry up and go to thorntons then, you only have a few hours of mindless scoffing left!!!! Stop off at my house once you have been lol lol x
Yes, don't try to appear better than you are. I have been guilty of this for years, and in fact I still laugh when I think of once when an ex-boyfriend said to thin air (when I was unable to say what I really meant/wanted to) "Excuse me, Mr Bush. We'll be out of your way in a moment when Leah stops beating around you." :roflmao:
:roflmao:
It is your stupid foot Annie!!!! That's what triggered you, that bloody foot!!!!! Xxx
I think maybe I will eat a banana..am I the only one who doesn't feel like eating?
Annie in a few weeks you will be scoffing too!!!! X
Great, now on top of my pork wrap, lump of brie and packet of crisps I now want a box of chocolates too! Thanks girls, lol
Oh well, at least my appetite is returning :)
Exactly Annie - you have a Campbells Condensed soup of things to upskittle you at the moment. You deserve to have some extra support; you've been strong for so long! :hugs:
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The very first thing to happen when I feel even the slightest bit stressed or panicky is that I don't want to eat. That's how I've ended up losing so much weight, that I'm now trying hard to put back on.
Anyone for a cuppa, by the way?
Well girls you have helped me without realising it, my dad is under anesthetic as we speak, I should have some news about tea time I hope. You are all keeping my mind off. Xx
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I am drinking diet Pepsi which is a bloody joke ha ha ha
You're scaring me today Laura so I will absolutely go to Thorntons and get mucho chocolate :winks:. The things I do for my NMP mates!
Sending good vibes to your Dad too Laura x
Oh Laura...I forgot today is the day for your Dad's scan and here I am pouring out my troubles...hugs for you :bighug1::bighug1:
bernie1977
05-11-12, 14:01
Sorry to hear you're feeling so bad, I hope the Doctor is of help. Sending you lots of :hugs:
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Hope everything goes well with your Dad Laura xx
That's what's so annoying about not being able to do housework, whenever I stress I clean
Dads last op lasted 8 hours, my house was immaculate!!!
My cat has OCD and I have to go and change his litter tray otherwise he is never going to stop meowing and biting my ankle!!
http://www.fatbuddhastore.com/includes/resize.asp?fn=/files/images/Mr_P_Mug_Teabreak%20(2).JPG&Wide=250
Oh Annie no don't be daft, I am fine. He is having a ct scan next week now and today they are going in with a camera to explore and try to fix whatever it is that is stopping him swallowing food. So once he comes round we should hopefully have a bit more info. Which is great because the not knowing is just the worst. I am remarkably calm. You lot are cheering me up :) x
I will go and put my kettle on!
Bernie...Thanks for the link you pm me, It is a lovely story. Bob the street cat if anyone is interested :)
:bighug1:Laura. Praying for your dad. xx
It's bloody typical, I am starting the cold I think, I have a scratchy throat, do you hear that meche, chocolate would soothe it!!!!!
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Thanks mech xx
That reminds me: you guys might like this blog post that my friend wrote on Saturday. She's copied out an excerpt from a book she's reading at the moment, which reminded me a lot of the CBT approach.
http://grumpymumtobe.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/being-as-alternative-to-doing.html
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Chocolate's good for whatever ails ye :winks:
:( I just went to empty my washing machine and everything was dry! I forgot to switch it on...honestly I am losing my mind x
If I have a cold and dad starts chemo, will I have to stay away from him till it clears up? I will wont I?
Nah Annie, that's just a sign that your subconscious wishes that it had a washing fairy to do it for you :winks:
Oh no!!!!! Stressing now, I will go get some first defence and see if that stops it
Yes you will Laura as anyone on chemo has a weakened immune system...but you can skype..I know its not the same but at least that way you can see each other xx
I think it depends on the strength of the chemo Laura? A colleague of mine had chemo for bowel cancer about a year ago, and she went home between sessions, so obviously didn't have to be in clean isolation or anything x
Nah Annie, that's just a sign that your subconscious wishes that it had a washing fairy to do it for you :winks:
Well what about the fact that I have come back from the kitchen without putting the kettle on and without my banana!
I had a cold when he had his big op to remove his esophagus and I had to wait a week to visit him, he will think I am taking the piss if I am Ill again this time lol x
maximus1975
05-11-12, 14:13
annie im right here with you im feeling desperate , i have had to up my meds this week with my dr , i dont give a dam about the addiction to them i cant carry on like this and neither can u, medication is designed to help people who are struggling and you are at the moment , i dont feel great about having to take an extra 2 tablets each day but if they improve me by 20% then so be it sending u a big :hugs:stay strong xxx
Well what about the fact that I have come back from the kitchen without putting the kettle on and without my banana!
You're still doing one better than me - I haven't even made it off my bum to get as far as the kitchen yet!
Dad had his spleen removed during his big op, they punctured it and couldn't stop it bleeding so they took it out. So dads immune system is already compromised and he takes antibiotics every day. I won't risk it if I am not feeling 100% it's just not worth it x
annie im right here with you im feeling desperate , i have had to up my meds this week with my dr , i dont give a dam about the addiction to them i cant carry on like this and neither can u, medication is designed to help people who are struggling and you are at the moment , i dont feel great about having to take an extra 2 tablets each day but if they improve me by 20% then so be it sending u a big :hugs:stay strong xxx
I hate taking any meds anytime but know I need to for this. I wouldn't even take all the painkillers for my fractured foot!
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Dad had his spleen removed during his big op, they punctured it and couldn't stop it bleeding so they took it out. So dads immune system is already compromised and he takes antibiotics every day. I won't risk it if I am not feeling 100% it's just not worth it x
You are right Laura...but hopefully your cold won't last long...plenty of fluids and hot baths and some hot curries to sweat it out!
Good idea, I will have curry tonight x
Lol Annie! I put my washing machine on over the weekend and hadn't even loaded it :wacko:. That was definitely a chocolate moment!! xx
It's definitely not just you Annie - I just tried to fill the kettle without taking the lid off first :wacko:
What are we all like? :roflmao: at least you have made me laugh
I could tell you other stories of the stupid things I've done Annie but then you would all know how mental I really am and may want to distance yourselves :wacko:! xx
I could tell you other stories of the stupid things I've done Annie but then you would all know how mental I really am and may want to distance yourselves :wacko:! xx
I don't think they could be worse than me. I mean who would go to a hospital appointment for their son and forget to collect said son up from school to take with them!! Honestly I got all the way to the hospital thinking "I'm sure I have forgotten something" I had to drive all the way back and my poor son was sitting in the school entrance saying "your late..my teacher said you are half an hour late!"
I shouldn't laugh..... but I did :roflmao:. Sorry Annie. At least we haven't forgot our sense of humour. I know once I lose that then I'm in big trouble! xx
I know Meche...and they say laughter is the best medicine. My friend just called and is on his way to see to me and cheer me up. He is really good because he can always manage to make me laugh and he said he is not going to let me sit here crying I have to get up off my butt and make him a cup of coffee!
I put the dog biscuits in the bin, instead of in the dog dish. I start a conversation and half way through my mind goes blank, this happens all the time and I never find the other half of the conversation that I lost, people look at me as though I am crazy.:wacko:
You have a lot of followers.:roflmao:
BobbyDog I am pleased we are not alone in this. I think I am getting worse at the moment though, I blame it on my hormones (menopause!)
Hi everyone .
I was brave Annie, had the canal root treatment without an injection
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But my wife put my tracksuit bottoms in the washing machine with all my money and credit card. The notes are drying as we speak.
MissHDynamite
05-11-12, 15:26
Aww Annie.. glad your friend is popping.. have you got that kettle on! :) and speaking of which the other I was doing my cuppa.. put the tea bag in the sink and the spoon in the bin! :doh:.
Has the doc rang you back yet? and I feel the same as you re the tablets. I don't know if to up it or change it xx
ElizabethJane
05-11-12, 15:28
Hi Annie I have been on large doses of dothiepin and that combined with the mirtazapine and lithium as well. Dr J took me off dothiepin as I had been on it a long time. I did this fairly quickly as NICE guidelines recommend patients to come off it. Dothiepin was extremely successful in alleviating my depression and I didn't have any complaints after fourteen years of taking it! I think you can still be on dothiepin and taking another anti d as well. It might be time to see a psychiatrist if you are feeling that bad for a longer period of time. I hope you feel better soon. EJ
In case you are wondering why I am butting in, Annie has befriended me and is always so helpful
You're not butting in Ricardo - this is an open forum, where anyone is allowed to post on any thread they want to. I'm sure your input is most welcome :)
Butt-in all you want Ricardo. This forum is for everyone. xx
Ricardo..Pleased you have got your tooth sorted, will be back soon. My friend has just called to see me x
Yes Annie. getting there was the hardest part, you all know what i mean. root canal treatment, took an hour but no injection, they seem to inject liquid into the open nerve.
Got home but felt completely zonked as if i had climbed a mountain.
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oh thanks everyone else for the welcome
Hi guys, paving the floors here waiting for news ................
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Paving lol lol lol I meant pacing!!!!!!! Did you all imagine me laying a floor lmao x
Was about to invite you to come and re-tile my kitchen Laura :winks:
Doctor has still not phoned me back.
Laura I hope you get some news soon
Ricardo...You are brave to go to the dentist. I go to a specialist dentist who deals with anxiety sufferers and have to practically be sedated to have the mirror in my mouth! I used to be fine at the dentists until I had a tooth removed in hospital. It took 1 hour to remove instead of the 15 minutes they expected and I woke up in theatre! No wonder I am traumatised!
MissHDynamite
05-11-12, 17:32
Good Luck Laura :hugs:and yes, I was imagining you tiling the floor for a minute then lol...
Annie, did you enjoy your friends visit? x
Annie is that about your son or yourself ?
Annie is that about your son or yourself ?
Myself...about increasing my medication. I think I will just do it anyway as they have told me to at other times.
MissH.. Yes Thank you I did enjoy my friends visit. I also had a neighbour call in with a big bowl of homemade broth for me :)
MissHDynamite
05-11-12, 17:50
Aww how lovely :) Get a big warm bowl of that and snuggle in and relax with hubby :hugs:x
Laura, I PM'd you last week (via Annie) not knowing the anquish you are going through right now.Stay strong.
It takes a while to get a grip on everyone and what is happening in their life at the moment.
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So its Shake,Rattle and Roll Annie:)
I will probably feel more exhausted than I already am with the increased dose for a few days. I have my physio tomorrow so hope I cope with getting there...NO...I will cope with getting there!!
Ricardo sorry I didn't get round to replying yet and don't worry about pm me I don't mind. Dad is being kept in tonight, he was meant to get his ct scan next week but the surgeon has decided to do it tonight at 10pm which I find very concerning, not sure if dad is a bit out of it and confused, perhaps they mean to do it tomorrow morning at 10??? They haven't told dad anything at all about what they did today, I phoned the ward and the nurse just said he was fine and that's all I could get out of her. My sister is in visiting him just now so hoping she can get more info, the hospital is an hour and a half away from me I feel like it's a million miles. X
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Annie I am glad your meds have been increased hopefully that will help x
maximus1975
05-11-12, 19:42
annie glad your hanging in there laura im sure your dad will be fine , ive just come back from my stressbuster course wasnt easy sitting in a room with 30 strangers but i coped this week was centered on panic and anxiety so it was right up my street , its trying to teach me to turn those negatives into posotives
:bighug1::bighug1::bighug1: for you Laura. They never tell you much on the phone but they should tell your sister more tonight. xx
I hope your dad gets better soon.I don't want to know the details because every time i hear someone is very ill i immediately think i will get it or have got it already.
MissHDynamite
05-11-12, 20:15
Big big hugs to you Laura and all the family... :bighug1: :bighug1: :bighug1: Thinking about you sweetie xx. Good luck with the new dose Annie.. Things can only get better :hugs: xx And Max, let us know if you've learnt any good tips!.. Well done for going x
Yes Laura, don't take the nurse not telling you anything on the phone as indicative of anything - apparently they're not allowed to now, as you could be anyone (so we were told when my Dad had his op in September anyway). They also operate/scan etc. around the clock in a lot of hospitals now, to try & tackle these backlogs the media are always whinging about (and I suppose they don't need natural light or anything for those things anyway).
Evening ladies. How we doing tonight?
Laura; hugs to you my lovely. I'm sure you're dad will be just fine.
Well that's it. I have officially started my diet..... nearly! Just been trying on clothes & almost everything is tight on me :ohmy:..... shocking. I shouldn't be surprised because I've eaten so much crap lately..... just didn't realise how much. I'm depressed now..... need chocolate! xx
Evening ladies. How we doing tonight?
Laura; hugs to you my lovely. I'm sure you're dad will be just fine.
Well that's it. I have officially started my diet..... nearly! Just been trying on clothes & almost everything is tight on me :ohmy:..... shocking. I shouldn't be surprised because I've eaten so much crap lately..... just didn't realise how much. I'm depressed now..... need chocolate! xx
All my clothes are dropping off me!! I have lost loads of weight the last few months.
Sparkle1984
05-11-12, 20:43
Evening ladies. How we doing tonight?
Laura; hugs to you my lovely. I'm sure you're dad will be just fine.
Well that's it. I have officially started my diet..... nearly! Just been trying on clothes & almost everything is tight on me :ohmy:..... shocking. I shouldn't be surprised because I've eaten so much crap lately..... just didn't realise how much. I'm depressed now..... need chocolate! xx
I'm good tonight thanks. :) I'm just having a quiet night in. I went to a fireworks display on Saturday night and really enjoyed it.
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annie glad your hanging in there laura im sure your dad will be fine , ive just come back from my stressbuster course wasnt easy sitting in a room with 30 strangers but i coped this week was centered on panic and anxiety so it was right up my street , its trying to teach me to turn those negatives into posotives
I did a similar course to that - it was called Stress Control in my area, and it was a 6 week course. I found it really helpful and I hope it will help you too.
I used to be like that Annie. Whenever I was stressed I didn't eat but some reason this time round I've gone the opposite way. Luckily I can lose it easily. Starting back at aerobics & yoga next week so will feel much better.
Sparkle; I was at a display on saturday too & had a really good night. xx
Sparkle1984
05-11-12, 21:03
The main firework display in my city is really good - they set off the fireworks to music and I think that's really clever. It seems to get better every year. :)
I am so sorry to hear how you are feeling Annie. You are not alone. I hope that your doctor can help you to come through this as soon as possible, it's not a good place to be.
Try not to be so hard on yourself and don't feel guilty about work....your health is far more important at this time.
Thinking of you and sending a big hug your way :hugs: Kitti :flowers: xx
Thank you so much Kitti xx
Annie, I have been so wrapped up in what has been happening here with the storm, I have really haven't had time to read post. Well my friend I just read this, and I am so sorry you do not feel well. I can't believe how you stuck by me, and thought of me feeling like you do. You are amazing!!! and very strong you will get past this, and it is my turn to send you many hugs!!!!!!!!! :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:Hope you feel better soon!!!! I think the name was Laura, sorry if I am wrong, but I hope you father is doing well, and that you are staying strong. :hugs:Debbi
Thank you Debbie and everyone else, tomorrow should bring some news, be it good or bad, at least we will have something to go on. Xx
Thank you Debbi, you have gone through such a lot with that storm and it must have been very scary. I have a friend in Ridgewood NJ and she said they have just got their power back.
Laura...:bighug1::bighug1::bighug1: xx
Keeping everything crossed for you overnight Laura! Update us when you know something, won't you? :hugs:
Did your Dr ring in the end Annie? Are you feeling any better than this morning?
I went with hubby & sister to a fireworks display tonight & really enjoyed it. I hardly felt anxious at all, and even managed to have a pot of mushy peas with mint sauce to myself (eating while out is usually unheard of for me, but I just did it!), so I'm feeling quite pleased tonight :)
reading through the comments, i wish i could do absolutely anything out of the house without being accompanied.
I know we all have different mental health issues,but i have 3 major issues in my life at the moment and have to deal with them all at once. i will expand later if you want me to.
I do still have all my hair and most of my teeth :shades:
The doctor still didn't ring but I took another tablet anyway. Have just woke up and feel really drowsy.
Laura & Meche...both difficult days for you today , thinking about you :hugs::hugs::hugs: xx
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Doctor has just phoned now...well the receptionist did and said I have to go to the surgery at 4pm x
Ricardo..you will get there..I really think cbt would benefit you.
best of luck at the surgery Annie xx
best of luck at the surgery Annie xx
I just had a real panic over it..I already have a physio appointment today and have cried over the thought of getting to the doctors especially with hubby being away. Hubby phoned surgery back and I will go tomorrow night when he is home to go with me.
MRS STRESS ED
06-11-12, 10:10
hi Annie im so sorry to here your not so good at the moment lets hope you get better soon sending you :hugs: :hugs:xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Jude
hi Annie im so sorry to here your not so good at the moment lets hope you get better soon sending you :hugs: :hugs:xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Jude
Thank you...I can't believe I have got myself so low down again, I hate feeling like this x
MRS STRESS ED
06-11-12, 10:20
Annie it happens lets just hope you can get back to yourself soon .I no its hard I always feel worse when my hubbys away aswell good luck and wishing you well xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx:hugs:
I took an extra tablet last night and feel so drowsy this morning. I really think my anxiety has turned to depression and I am not sure which is worse. Too much to think about this week..physio, doctors, CBT, occupational health assessment. My life revolves around medical appointments at the moment. I can't even phone my son to find out how he is because him being ill is making me worse. He keeps posting things on facebook so he must be okay :) xx
MRS STRESS ED
06-11-12, 10:37
I took an extra tablet last night and feel so drowsy this morning. I really think my anxiety has turned to depression and I am not sure which is worse. Too much to think about this week..physio, doctors, CBT, occupational health assessment. My life revolves around medical appointments at the moment. I can't even phone my son to find out how he is because him being ill is making me worse. He keeps posting things on facebook so he must be okay :) xx
Awh Annie I really feel for you anxiety depression ,you sound like you have alot to deal with at the moment ,its no wonder your low and when our kids are ill its awful. I no how hard it is my son to has health problems sending you and your son :hugs: :hugs: keep going Annie im sure you will get there xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
MissHDynamite
06-11-12, 11:36
Oh Annie.. I am so sorry you are still feeling this way :hugs:
But your not on your own.. I really do not know what is wrong with me. I dont know if these tabs are not suiting me or what but I feel horrible again. My body and head are in a constant state of panic! I am dreaming funny and waking up in a panic. Stayed in bed again until 11, just couldn't face getting up. My head is so full again, shaking and just can't settle. The thought of being poorly every day is making me feel poorly.. if you get what I mean. Bigs hugs again sweetie :bighug1:x
I have made it out of bed, showered and had some breakfast. I cried when my husband left for work. He won't be home until tomorrow afternoon. I have to phone doctor again in the morning for an appointment tomorrow night. I couldnt face going without my hubby for support. I am going to ask if they can check for vitamin deficiency and hormone levels. Hugs back to you :bighug1::bighug1:
maximus1975
06-11-12, 12:53
hi folks well i made it to the stress buster course week 2 so i was happy with that and didnt feel to nervous during the session, a lot of it was things i already new about but it was worth it just to be refreshed we went to the symtoms of panic /anxiety/depression , fight or flight, then we filled in a sort of wagon wheel with stress in the middle and then the boxes on the outside as to what we think feeds our stress . learnt more on breathing techniques to prevent hyperventilation , BORIS you'll be pleased to no we went into mindfulness all sorts of things really the session lasted 1 hour and 20 mins and i always come out feeling a lot better than i did before i went into the meeting , as per norm i was itching to ask people that were on the course why they were there ie what was stressing them but i reframed i did talk to one bloke who was there for anger management i get a great deal of comfort in seeing alot of people there knowing im not the only person mum came with me as usual which i appreciated nice to have some back up i am on a lot of meds but hey it got me to the meeting and thats the main thing i did have a very brief conversation with the lady afterwards about panic/agrophobia and she was very good in calming me down for something thats free i get a lot out of it so if your in cornwall the course runs through out the county at different venues during the year i would pop along.
and now to today i had an appoitment with a diabetic /pancreatic specialist i was dreading going to this as it was in town and out of my comfort zone at the moment, i tried to bottle it then told myself that wasnt gunna help matters so went for it, the lady was great we went through a load of stuff i said to her that pancretitis has given me depression and she belived this could well be the case , she predicted it could be up to a year before i finally get back to full energy i hadnt quite estimated how big a deal pancretitis is after you leave hospitol if leaves you with very little energy. one thing she did pick up on is that mitrazipine may well be making my depression worse i will discuss this with my gp tomorrow as it was round about the time i started taking it that my depression got worse, they switched me to it from citalopram to help me sleep better but personally i dont think its doing much for my depression. we then talked about my cholestrol and how that was giving me health anxiety she calmed me down by saying she see alot of diabetics with high cholestrol and not to worry to much at this moment in time and that im doing all the right things to get it down, i managed a walk through town afterwards which i couldnt have done a week ago so thats something to be happy about , im still no where near my normal self but have made it out and about a couple of times walked past loads of pubs and shops and not bought any booze need to build on these tiny steps now
Max, I am pleased you sound like you have had a positive morning :)
maximus1975
06-11-12, 13:08
i have compared to yesterday , are u feeling a little better today annie? i wish we all lived in the same area so we could meet up and beat this disease together especially agrophobia , i no in my mind that if i have a few beers i can do anything but then i risk getting pancrettitis again so i have to do these things drink free so my old friend who boosted my confidence is no longer with me so mentally im fragile but physically i must be getting better every day big:hugs::hugs:to u xx
You are doing well beating the alcohol and you will feel better in the end. I very rarely drink and even when I do it isn't much...honestly I can get giggly on 2 mouthfuls of Jaques! has it's disadvantages as at family events I always end up being the driver! I have my physio appointment at 2.45 today but that is not too much of a problem for me. He is so nice and helps to build my confidence. xx
Nice & good-looking Annie! It'll get you by everytime :).
Sorry you're having another bad day. It won't be long before you turn that corner and life will be good again. Sending you big hugs. :bighug1:
maximus1975
06-11-12, 13:28
enjoy your physio xx
I really hope so Meche..I am so sick of feeling like this. My friend is coming for me at 2.15 to take me to the physio. We have been best friends for over 20 years (may sound strange when he is a man). I have always been there to support him and he to support me and he is good friends with my hubby now as well. He was there to support me through my divorce from my first husband and is perfect when I have a panic attack..he is the only one who can snap me out of it quick!
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I am worried my physio will not be happy because I am too scared to walk on my toes still and he told me to keep doing it :scared15:
Annie it truly breaks me up to hear you in such a state.I think your mind is racing from one thought to another and that in turn is increasing the adrenelin flow and your anxiety.
I like the point made earlier that we all put on a brave face when we visit the doctor as if we are embarressed to show our true feelings and the state we really are in.
I had the same effect on prozac as someone else said.first time i gained loads then two years later lost my appetite.
I will look up Setraline (secretly)
Annie and other friends, my daughter had yet another X ray today, this time for sinuses, everything clear. now she has seen a to neurologist,two GP's, had a brain scan and X ray, countless blood tests, eyes tested yet she has a constant migraine and photo phobia and at 24 sits at home with us crying. I am at my wits end.
Someone told my wife maybe it is related to my daughter's IBS and the food she eats,but we are going round in circles and I feel like a helpless father.
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http://twitpic.com/b8fovr/full
which one is me i sent this to Annie and caoline-j and they both picked the same, and both were wrong :roflmao:
Ricardo, I am so sorry that things are not getting better for your daughter. Maybe your daughter could have a food tolerance test done to see if it could be related to diet?
My physio went well. Physio explained about nervous system and how I as an anxiety sufferer will be more sensitive to pain. Still need to get my calf muscles strengthened more. :)
That's what they suggested Annie, but with IBS there is a huge list associated with migraine.we keep trying.
You sound better :yesyes:
Better than I was this morning but I often pick up again on an evening. Have just spoke to my son and he is still waiting for his scan appointment.
MissHDynamite
06-11-12, 17:43
Hi Annie.. glad you managed to go for your physio.. well done you :) It is nice to know he realises the difference in anxiety sufferers.. that will make you feel more comfortable for next time. Try and do the exercises he has given you in a CBT style. Tiny steps first to build up your confidence... and whilst your doing that I shall put your name down for the Marathon next year :D Glad your feeling a little brighter.. and lovely hubby back tomorrow :hugs: x
Hi Annie.. glad you managed to go for your physio.. well done you :) It is nice to know he realises the difference in anxiety sufferers.. that will make you feel more comfortable for next time. Try and do the exercises he has given you in a CBT style. Tiny steps first to build up your confidence... and whilst your doing that I shall put your name down for the Marathon next year :D Glad your feeling a little brighter.. and lovely hubby back tomorrow :hugs: x
I have been going to my physio every week for 8 weeks now and I don't know where I would be without him. The NHS one was rubbish...a couple of days after my cast was removed he took one of the crutches off me and said walk! I hadn't had my foot on the ground for 3 months! The private one has really understood about my anxiety and has been so understanding and built my confidence so much. I want him to move in with me so he can keep reassuring me and massage my foot and leg everyday :roflmao:
maximus1975
06-11-12, 18:49
interesting u say u pick up in mood in the evenings a bit im exactly the same i hate the afternoons , the specialist said today with my pancretitis that im gunna be of work for quite some time ( let alone my mental state ) i really struggle to fill the days then the depression and anxiety creep in , im gunna have to find something to do otherwise im gunna go insane
I know, that's how I have been stuck in not being able to move around...getting bored with daytime TV!
Hope you feel better by tomorrow Annie:flowers:
Thank you Arose. I start my cbt course tomorrow so hoping that will help xx
Sparkle1984
06-11-12, 19:24
Good luck with your CBT course Annie. Is it one-to-one or is it group therapy?
Thank you Sparkle, it is one-one xx
I like this little group,so tomorrow would you help me with my problems that i mentioned yesterday.
We all try to support each other Ricardo so I am sure my friends here will help if they can :)
Hi guys - how are you all doing tonight?
Annie; how are you feeling my darling? xx
Better than this morning Thanks...well I was until I checked my o2 account. They gave me a free upgrade last month, free phone. Then tried to charge me £150 for it. They said the only way I could get it back was to get my bank to claim it back, which I did and now they are charging me for it again and saying they will take it back from my account!! My hubby is going to sort it when he gets home tomorrow because it is stressing me too much!
Let hubby deal with it. You really don't need any added stress at the moment. It's always something isn't it! Glad you feel better than this morning though - that's a positive sign. xx
Lets see what tomorrow brings :)
Sparkle1984
06-11-12, 21:24
Better than this morning Thanks...well I was until I checked my o2 account. They gave me a free upgrade last month, free phone. Then tried to charge me £150 for it. They said the only way I could get it back was to get my bank to claim it back, which I did and now they are charging me for it again and saying they will take it back from my account!! My hubby is going to sort it when he gets home tomorrow because it is stressing me too much!
That's annoying; do you know why they tried to renege on the deal, or was it a complete mistake? I hope your husband is able to sort it out for you.
I don't know, they said it was a mistake but said we would have to ask our bank to claim back the money as they couldn't do it which I found strange. They have now added it on my next bill after promising it was sorted! People who don't check their statements would probably not even know they are doing it.
Sparkle1984
06-11-12, 21:46
That does sound strange, if it was their mistake then surely they should be able to refund you themselves. :lac:
They said because they are such a big company they can't! I contacted Trading standards and they say they are in breach of contract. daft things like that though get me so stressed.
Sparkle1984
06-11-12, 22:00
Yes things like that do wind me up if someone makes a mistake and doesn't do anything to put it right. Anyway, I hope it gets sorted out.
Hi guys. How are you all tonight x
Hi Laura..How are you? you are the one going through the hardest time, bless you xx
Annie, just checking in on you, how are you doing today, any better! Laura I hope you are hanging in there, and Annie I hope you son is doing well also. Sending you all hugs from USA, :hugs: and I will be thinking of all of you!
Annie, just checking in on you, how are you doing today, any better! Laura I hope you are hanging in there, and Annie I hope you son is doing well also. Sending you all hugs from USA, :hugs: and I will be thinking of all of you!
Thank you so much. I am feeling more settled tonight...will see what tomorrow brings. My son is still waiting for an appointment for his scan. How are things with you? I hope the weather isn't go to get too bad for you again. I thought my friend in Ridgewood NJ had power back but now she tells me it may take another week before it is back on. xx
Thanks girls, I am ok I guess, kind of washed out I suppose, I have walked the floors all day and been crying non stop but I have stopped crying now and just don't really feel anything. I spoke to dad again earlier on, he was joking and trying to make light, he isn't getting chemo on Thursday, I got that wrong, he is getting a laparoscopy, they want to view the tumour from the other side, then all his tests will be sent to oncology and they will all plan dads chemo mix. So he is back in at 8am Thursday. X
Aww Laura...wish I could be there to give you a real hug, have they kept him in hospital? :bighug1::bighug1:
No they let him home at 6pm, he asked us all to just let him be alone tonight and he will speak to us tomorrow. I think he just needs some time to soak it all up. X
Yes and it will have been a really tiring day for him waiting around and having all the scans etc. You take care of yourself Laura...I wish I lived nearer so I could help you out. xx
My poor gran is 85 and is recovering from breaking her hip, she has taken it so bad, she dotes on my dad, her blue eyed boy, I am worried about her too. And I have mum going into hospital in 2 weeks for surgery on her veins in her leg. I honestly don't know whether I am coming or going. Why does it always come all at once? X
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Thanks Annie you are so caring, don't you go getting all anxious and worked up over my stuff, we talked about this :) I will be fine! X
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My new motto is "you are never given more than you can handle" here's hoping its true x
No matter how old you are and how old your kids are you don't like to see them suffer so it will be hard for your poor Gran, bless her. I was just saying that to my hubby that everything always seems to come at once and some people get more than their fair share I think. xx
Awwwww my heart is breaking for you both. I wish there was something I could do. I wish I lived near you both. :weep: All I can do is just keep sending hugs. :hugs: Annie your friends in NJ. NJ is in such bad shape, and it is so cold, and frustrating. (I'm blessed, compared to what they endured) Did they make it through that storm, is there house alright? I feel so bad for them, and I hope they get power very soon, also. If I can do anything for you both to cheer you up let me know. Really thinking of you both. Debbi
Their house is fine but some of their neighbours were not so lucky, and there were lots of trees blown down in her garden. She was worried about her parents home as they had no power and are elderly but they managed to get a generator to them. Thank you Debbi for your kind words. xx
Got my phone bill sorted! (couldn't wait for hubby to get home to do it!) Got a lovely lady today who after I ranted on about it sending my anxiety levels up and crying down the phone, she told me she has suffered PND and has panic attacks so really wanted to help me...sorted :) x
MRS STRESS ED
07-11-12, 10:31
awh thats nice isnt it supprising how many people suffer with it ,how are you feeling today Annie hope your well and your son. I woke up with a shocking headache never could be worse xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx:hugs:
Uping my dose to 100mg has made it really hard to wake up on a morning...feel like a zombie! Just going to have a bath. I am going out at 12.30 for my cbt. Hope your headache goes..waking up with them always makes them last longer for me. Try a hot wheat bag over your forehead. Just had an embarrassing moment while typing this, doorbell rang..thought it was my neighbour so answered door in my pj's..it was the meter reader! I had to go out in my pj's to open the garage door for him! :blush:
Morning all!
Pleased you got the phone bill thing sorted Annie - it's always such a relief when you get a customer service rep who actually cares about providing a service isn't it?
I went dancing last night and managed to stay longer than the last time - nearly to 11pm! - so I'm having a sleepy start to the day and can't imagine taking my usual walk up to the butchers at the moment (I might have to be lazy and take the car!). I was asked if I would go to a demonstration dance in the city centre on Saturday to advertise the club. I'd like to go, but I'm not sure if I'm brave enough yet so I said I would see.
MRS STRESS ED
07-11-12, 10:55
AWH I would of felt embarrassed aswel I do things like that lol,:D thanks for the advice for my headache ,and good luck with yout cbt I got mine tomorrow xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx:hugs:
The customer services rep was quite happy I think to talk to someone who understood her and said about her putting her daughters shoes in the fridge and how she cried when she realised she had done it!
Leah that would be lovely if you can get the courage to do it :)
maximus1975
07-11-12, 12:17
go for it elle once you get there you may really enjoy it , annie you seem a little brighter today , laura still thinking about u lots xx:hugs:
Thanks max x. I was just talking to dad, he is in to hospital tomorrow morning for a laporoscopy, I am going to bring my gran down to my house on Friday to stay the weekend, it will give dad a break and mybey take grans mind off, the kids adore great gran or as they call her GG :) it will be good for them and it will keep me busy x
That will be lovely for your Gran Laura especially being around your children. I have been for my cbt and cried all the way home but feeling quite positive about it. She said I have severe anxiety and depression and possibly PTSD.
My friend who took me to the appointment bought me a little book called Keep calm and carry on x
Sparkle1984
07-11-12, 15:21
I feel pretty awful today - lethargic with low mood and I'm finding it hard to concentrate on things. :mad: I can't wait til hometime!
Hi guys - what a busy day I'm having! Can't believe it's nearly hometime.
Sorry you're all feeling a bit down today - :bighug1: to everyone! xx
Be kind to yourself and do something nice for yourself each day Annie. Let that be your purpose in life for now, that is enough. I'm sure CBT will help you. I'm half way through mine and it has made a huge difference and positive impact on my life. The only thing certain in life is change. You will not always feel this way. You are not alone. I wish you every success with your recovery :bighug1: Cat xxx
My husband came home and I managed to get to Sainsbury's with him for a few bits and pieces and didn't have the checkout panic this time so that was a big positive!
Have you decided about the dancing Leah?
Annie did they give you homework and little books to read through. It will get easier, my god you did sainsburys without panic, that's awesome!! Xx
No they didn't Laura but I gave her 18 pages of my life traumas to read through for her homework! I said I couldn't verbally go through everything because I would just cry. I didn't go in the food part of Sainsbury's..left hubby to do that. I only found a magazine and some super glue to repair yet another ornament that my daft cat has managed to break. :D
There you two are :hugs:you keep jumping threads
i got the CBT for dummies today to start off, Annie
So today was more about her getting to know who you are, next session will be better. And your meds should have settled a bit. X
Sorry you keep losing us Ricardo..we do keep popping up here and there :D I haven't seen CBT for Dummies..hope it will help you (although I am certain you are not a dummie!). Mine has left me a bit drained today but I know that is to be expected in the early days.
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I am going to see the doctor in the morning to review my meds. I am also going to ask about hormone and vitamin deficiencies as I am a lady of that age lol. I can't cope with all these appointments I have. Occupational Health on Friday is the one I am not looking forward to.
Why are you worried about Fridays one, what's that for? X
Work have sent me to see if they think I am ready to go back to work and how and when I am going to get back to work.
Your Dr has said that you're not ready Annie, and the occupational health person can't naysay that, so try not to worry too much :)
I've not decided for sure about dancing on Saturday yet, but I think I'm going to give it my best shot as I would like to go. They've organised it to last a couple of hours, with drinks/food after, but I figure I'm free to come & go when I like, so could just stay for as long as I feel comfortable and see how I get on.
Your Dr has said that you're not ready Annie, and the occupational health person can't naysay that, so try not to worry too much :)
I've not decided for sure about dancing on Saturday yet, but I think I'm going to give it my best shot as I would like to go. They've organised it to last a couple of hours, with drinks/food after, but I figure I'm free to come & go when I like, so could just stay for as long as I feel comfortable and see how I get on.
That isn't so bad if you know you can leave anytime you want. I just went with hubby to my friends to drop some little gifts off for my students at school and even made it into Tesco on the way back to buy a book! I am determined to beat this!
You seem to be feeling more positive already since your CBT, even if it did feel a bit traumatic - that's great! :D
Incidentally everyone, is there a Carol here who has sent me a Facebook request...?!
I don't know of any one called Carol.
I just wish I could stop feeling so exhausted. I think my anxiety has been taken over more by depression now.
I think it's natural to ping from one to the other to be honest. I know the first thing my Dr did when I went to see him in June was give me a diagnostic questionnaire to fill in to find out whether I was depressed as well as anxious.
Still, fore-warned is fore-armed, as they say - anything we know about, we can deal with :)
My therapist did that with me today and it came out with severe anxiety and severe depression plus possible PTSD. Is there any hope for me?!
maximus1975
07-11-12, 20:11
i came out of that test with anxiety and bad depression
I ticked all the boxes with feeling like that every day, then I panicked thinking "I hope they don't admit me to hospital! I found one of the questions very difficult as it said 'Do you ever wish you would be better of dead or feel like ending your life' I think those questions should be separate as yes I have had fleeting thoughts of I would be better of dead but would never do anything and I know they are fleeting thoughts as deep down I know my life is worth living and I want to be here, I just want to be here and well...Does that make sense?
Yes that makes total sense, and is practically what I thought when I encountered the same question. I have thought that I would be better off not here, and that everyone else would be better off without me, and in my worst moments I've even begged other people to let go of me, but on reflection I put this down to a desperate need to feel in control of my own life rather than an actual desire to be dead, if you see what I mean?
I do see what you mean...my doctor once said do you mean you don't want to live or do you mean you don't want to live as you are feeling now...it was the latter for me. The question on the questionnaire didn't seem to be worded right.
Yes, it shocked me to feel that I fit into that criteria (even if I only half fit because of the wording of the question), and I filled in the questionnaire while I was alone because I didn't want to risk my family finding out how bad I was really feeling.
You know those bloody questionnaires are anxiety on a sheet, I remember filling one out after having the kids, screening for post natal depression I remember feeling fivne when I started reading it, and I ended up in teaes by the end of it, bloody nonsense and causes much more stress at times, the doctor would be better just talking to to you instead of trying to squeeze you into a box! X
I saw my doctor this morning and he was so lovely. I started off telling him about my foot and he said "I am not worried about your foot at all..I am worried about you!" He agreed to the change of dosage on my meds. He assured me that I will get out of this and feel better again. He doesn't want to take me down the HRT route because of side effects but said he will if I feel I really need it. I am going to look up diet suggestions to help me through it. He was so sympathetic about it all.
So pleased your Dr was reassuring and sympathetic Annie :) I remember I very nearly cried and had to apologise for my wobbly voice when my own Dr "took my side" when I was feeling so low back in June - it was so nice just to hear someone say "of course you're poorly and not fit to work" when I'd been struggling on for so long and thinking it was all in my head.
In other news this morning..... *drum roll*...... I've applied for a job!!!
Not the one I mentioned the other day - that form hasn't got here yet - but a part time clerical one near my home. I've applied to the same company before and got nowhere, but with less experience than I have now, so fingers crossed this time :)
Will keep my fingers crossed for you Leah. I am feeling much brighter this afternoon. he doctor told me to start taking my tablets earlier in the evening instead of bedtime, that way I may not feel so drowsy on a morning. :) xx
Thanks Annie :) I expect I'll be totally terrified & wishing I'd never bothered applying if I even get offered an interview, let alone get offered the job, but I think it will be good for me to get back to some sort of work (though part-time this time, so I don't feel trapped in a rutt like I did before).
That's a good idea from your Dr. I only woke up at 11:30 this morning after the Snoring Symphony last night (I seriously thought I was going to have to sleep in the living room!), so I'm having a very drowsy, lazy day.
Hi ladies. Sorry not been around - work has been so busy and not had a chance to log-on. Honestly - work is really interfering with my social life :winks:!
Leah; huge congrats on applying for the job honey. Wishing you all the luck in the world. Work has helped me so much throughout my issues - it's a welcome distraction.
Annie; glad you got to see your doctor. Sounds like he was lovely and sympathetic to you. Great that you're feeling better today - that corner has turned! :bighug1:xx
I hope so Meche...It is costing me a fortune in tissues with all the crying! :D
maximus1975
08-11-12, 14:57
hi annie so have u been signed of work for a while? my dr was not keen on me being of work but i think there comes a time when our anxiety/ depression is that bad that a break is needed
MissHDynamite
08-11-12, 15:09
Afternoon all.. just had a catch up read..
Annie well done for the Sainsburys trip.. every little helps (or is that Tescos :)). Glad to hear your doc is getting where your coming from now, its so much easier when you feel they understand. Good luck with the upping of the tab and hopefully taking it earlier will ease the tiredness x
Miss Leah.. your a brave one. Applying for a job is a huge step and just shows how much your mental health has improved over the weeks :). Keep up the great work x
Laura.. have been thinking about you. I think its a great idea having gg over for a few days :) Good luck with the form filling! x
Catch up with everyone else in a minute lol xx
You need an Andrex puppy Annie :D - that would make you feel so much better! xx
Max..I have been off work since June but that is due to my fractured foot.
MissH...I got to Tesco as well as Sainsbury's
Meche..My cat would probably eat the Andrex puppy!
How do you feel about going back to work Annie? Does it fill you with dread or do you think it would help? xx
Fills me with dread at the moment! My doctor realises that and won't let me go back until he thinks I am ready. xx
maximus1975
08-11-12, 15:38
the only reason i asked is im keen to get back to work but my dr doesnt think im ready , guess he thinks im to low xx
I have learnt from experience not to go back too soon. When I was at my worse with anxiety 8 years ago I kept telling my doctor I was going back to work and after a couple of times of breaking down and being sent home again my doctor said "Now you will listen to me and go back when I say!"
maximus1975
08-11-12, 16:07
yeh ive been there before ,years ago i can remeber going into work and having to go home again several times , i hate being of work though gives me way to much time to think, how an earth do you no when the time is right?? why cant i just relax and say to myself ive been through a tough time just been diagnosed as diabetic just had pancretitis , instead i beat myself up all day long about not being able to work and claiming sick pay
AWWWWW Annie, how do you feel today? I hate working, every morning getting ready, I am a nervous wreck, at work, nervous wreck, come home nervous wreck, it stinks! So you listen to that Doctor, and stay home! just get you better. It is mentally exhausting! and I only work 3 days a wk. This anxiety/panic is such a curse, I'd like to know what I did in my life before that was so bad to deserve this! lol Debbi
You have to do what is right for you Annie. Take as long as you need - it's important you feel physically and mentally well again.
For me personally I've found work a godsend. Don't get me wrong, there have been days when I've struggled to get out of bed and days when I've been at work and felt like crap but it's been important for me to keep a routine. That's just how I deal with it. Plus I'm a bit of a control freak and don't like anybody doing my work :wacko:... probably the real reason! xx
peterf1966
08-11-12, 16:16
listening to yr posts annie you sound like a strong woman !!! and im sure you will pull through this !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! even yr students are missing you !!!! so you must have something about you eh? i like you used to get upset and cry at everything im 46 and im quite an emotional guy even crying at sad films ( yes i do ) but i used to sit and cry till my face was all mottled and flushed , and i sat in front of the mirror and had a chat with myself (yes i know what you must be thinking)
and at the end the face looking back at me through the mirror smiled ,something i hadnt done in ages, i couldnt understand why the hell i felt so bad and just wanted to cry all the time, after all i have a home a job etc and im not that ugly (well maybe at 6am when i get up for work i dont look my best) and reading about yr situation sound quite familiar to me hence i say with confidence YOU WILL COME BACK FROM THIS AND BE YOU AGAIN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!take care pete:
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exellent reply debbie !!!!!
Max..When I can wake up on a morning without going straight into panic mode and being able to deal with my daily chores at home, that is when my doc will let me go back to work and it will be a phased return.
Debbi...I once said to my counselor I don't know what I have done in the life before to go through this and she said "You have enough trauma in this life so don't start adding what trauma's you might have had in the one before!!!
Meche...I know, I am thinking, I hope my supply hasn't got all my resources and files in a muddle!!
Pete Thank you very much for your kind words..I have some lovely students..one of them sent me a best teacher certificate today and that really touched me (I also have some very difficult students!) We do have to chat to our selves sometimes Pete..I often say to myself.."come on Ann, you are going to get up and get on with life today" (I don't always listen to myself though :) ). I know I will get there..I just get a bit impatient sometimes :)
maximus1975
08-11-12, 16:30
ggod words pete yeh you will beat this annie and so will i , for me its all about a decent diet , staying way clear of booze , fags and just getting myself better slowly , i guess we are gunna have to realise its gunna take time which is tough as i want to click my fingers and be well now , have u any hobbies that you do in the day time? how do you fill your day ? once i get on top of my agrophobia i want to get back into my golf again its quite a big step and i dont think im ready quite yet my brother was trying to get me to go today but it didnt feel right upset me that he can do what he wants and yet my mind holds me back , the golf course is about 2 miles away so its a little bit out of my comfort zone at the moment , when i got really poorly last time im not sure how i got my confidence back to play golf i guess it will just happen ? its my health anxiety thats holding me back my heart attack phobia , plus the fear of having an anxiety attack on the course fills me with dread xx
Great advice as usual annie. You are the best. It's true, I have enough going on now, to think like that! :)
Max..My hobbies, reading, trying to learn Italian (not with much success). I also have a diploma in holistic therapies but only do it for family and friends not as a job. I find it relaxing myself giving treatments. I was tracing my family tree and have got a long way back on my mothers side and part of my Fathers side. I say I was as I have given up for a while after finding out that my great, great grandparents on my fathers, fathers side both hung themselves...not what I wanted to know in my fragile condition!!! It was interesting though finding out what happened to their 6 children who all seemed to do well in the various places they were brought up in. xx
fozzy is crying
08-11-12, 16:46
Max..My hobbies, reading, trying to learn Italian (not with much success). I also have a diploma in holistic therapies but only do it for family and friends not as a job. I find it relaxing myself giving treatments. I was tracing my family tree and have got a long way back on my mothers side and part of my Fathers side. I say I was as I have given up for a while after finding out that my great, great grandparents on my fathers, fathers side both hung themselves...not what I wanted to know in my fragile condition!!! It was interesting though finding out what happened to their 6 children who all seemed to do well in the various places they were brought up in. xx
Ann,
You missed out teasing Bears.
Fozzy
You're a busy lady Annie. It's important to keep occupied - well done. I start back at aerobics and yoga next week. I used to go 3 times a week but that all stopped in February and it's my biggest regret. I've put on a few pounds and feel so slugglish - it hasn't done much for my confidence. xx
Ann,
You missed out teasing Bears.
Fozzy
Oh yes my favourite hobby is teasing bears and eating my husbands yorkshire puddings :winks:
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You're a busy lady Annie. It's important to keep occupied - well done. I start back at aerobics and yoga next week. I used to go 3 times a week but that all stopped in February and it's my biggest regret. I've put on a few pounds and feel so slugglish - it hasn't done much for my confidence. xx
I really need to do more to keep fit when this silly foot is healed. I used to do yoga when I was in my teens but don't know if I would manage at my age :D
Annie - if I can do it you can. When I first started going to yoga with a friend we got told off because we kept laughing at the funny positions we were in. I felt like I was back at school being told off by teacher :lac:! Oh and yoga makes you fart (even more laughter) ...... sorry but it does! :D
Annie - if I can do it you can. When I first started going to yoga with a friend we got told off because we kept laughing at the funny positions we were in. I felt like I was back at school being told off by teacher :lac:! Oh and yoga makes you fart (even more laughter) ...... sorry but it does! :D
I can get in the positions but the problem is getting out of them again!!!:ohmy:
Just get a second hand game of "Twister" - cheaper than Yoga lessons, but all the fun of the crazy positions :winks:
I've done my family history too Annie. I did my Dad's side (one of the reasons I kept my maiden name when I got married). I haven't found out anything worthy of "Who do you think you are" (there was one relation in the 1700s who fell into a canal and drowned one night - most likely because he was drunk! lol), but I find pleasure in knowing where I came from, and knowing that I have a long continuity with this county :)
I must admit Leah, I have really enjoyed doing my family tree and finding out about my ancestors. One of them was the town crier in Whitby. Another was in the navy and died and was buried at sea just off the coast of Ireland. Unfortunately I have not found out that I am the heir to some great fortune :D
No, me neither! It's not fair is it? :)
little scientist
08-11-12, 17:53
My aerobics class has just been culled permanently :( gutting, as its the only decent timed one I can get to. Looks like I am going back to the drawing board in trying to find a new one :(
Hello :)
Can I suggest that you don't "try" too hard. Fighting or reasoning with the mind only gives it more power and fuel.
Have a look at this vid, and related vids:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DuwUIRhwfJE&feature=related
It's a guy called Mooji who teaches how to be separate from and at peace with your mind. Give a couple of vids a chance. It may come across as religious at first but it really isn't, perhaps slightly buddhist but overall a genuinely good way to help with thoughts and feelings.
Thanks...I have already watched some Mooji videos...they are very good. I am also signed up for CBT4Panic which I am finding helpful.
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This Mooji video you just posted is very inspiring, I had not seen this one before..Thank you :)
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