Can anyone else relate?

[ConfusedByLife]

I've never met anyone else who can relate to this, firstly cuz it is really embarrassing and secondly cuz it's not the kind of question you ask. But, personally I know I am scared of women. Ive was always an outgoing kid and did loads of things but was always fairly comfortable around "girls", then throughout my teens I seemed to get extremely self concious. I know everyone at this stage feels like this and is nervous with the opposite sex, but this is where I think I made a fatal error. Where some people evntually jump and go for it, I have failed to ever make a move on anyone. I always work myself up into such a state that it just becomes impossible to come off "normal" in a conversation and it just scares ppl off. I'm really at a loss to know where to go next. Im 23 now and I feel as nervous around women as ever. I know probably the best solution is to try one step at a time but this is hard when I know I will freak out and make a fool of myself. If only I could get past the first hurdle I know I wd be ok. Can anyone else relate or at least giv some tips to calm me down. It seems even the most nervous ppl on here hav partners and it's really beginning to get me down.

Cheers

[farrah2412]

hi there
one step at a time is right ---why not start by saying hello back to me!!!
take care
farrah

[juju]

hi
its prob just you that THINKS that u are making a fool of yourself, the other person prob doesnt even notice, try to concentrate more on wot the other person is saying and divert the attention from yourself. ask a lot of questions, get them talking( girls love talking bout themselves anyway ha ha) and believe me most girls like a man who is sensitive and not an arrogant prat anyway. i dont think that age has anything to do with it either, i wouldnt worry about that.
you will b fine,
it will all come naturally when the time is right.

take care
juju

we are all stronger people after having this

[vernon]

I was always the same scared of opposite sex and embarrassed, I always knew I wasn’t good enough for anyone and why would they want anything to do with me when the is lots of outgoing confident males about. The only time I could talk to the opposite sex is when I got drunk, so often got drunk to try and chat someone up, then me being drunk probs put them off. I met my wife at 27 so you have plenty of time yet and believe me when the right one comes along you will both feel comfortable enough to talk to each other. Take care hope everything goes ok. Vernon

[Dave777]

Hey what do I know? ...... even after a few decades of learning, I'm still scared, but it's a little easier;)[Sigh...]

Maybe it's thinking too much about the opposite sex side of it ..... just look at the person. Talk to the person, that minimises the terror factor:)


Dave

PS. PM me if it helps to chat

[in need of a friend]

At least its only one sex, its both for me. I have been hurt by so many people I just feel as though I cant trust anyone, therefore I generally dont talk to many people and now I dont know how to.

[ConfusedByLife]

Sorry, it took so long to reply but thanks for your input guys. Even if it doesnt make me feel any less nervous, at least it lets me know that i'm not a complete wierdo....yet, lol. Seriously tho, i really do appreciate it