avoiding things and cancelling plans.

[hellybelly1982]

Hi everybody,
Does anyone else avoid things and cancel plans? Alot of my anxiety stems from not being able to sleep and having insomnia and being tired. I work as an office cleaner and have to be up for work at 5.00am and I'am home just after 8.00am. Normally I go back to bed in the morning for a nap as I only average about 6 hours sleep a night which is not enough for me. I was supposed to be going horseriding on monday (something I love and have been saving for the past two weeks) but today I have cancelled because I'am sitting here feeling anxious because my lesson is at 10.00am and I worry that I wont be able to sleep sunday night because im worrying that I will be tired for my riding lesson. And then I'm worrying that I'm worrying about it and that will cause me not to sleep and then I will be to tired and anxious to go anyway :wacko:
Also today I was supposed to meet a friend for a coffee but cancelled because I had to work, go food shopping and clean my hamster out and the thought of doing something else was making me anxious. Even though it only would have been for an hour and I could have easly fitted it in. It's no wonder I have no friends because I cancel all the time.
Does anyone else have the same problem? :hugs:

[AnxiousBaker]

YES! This i can relate 100% to this. This by far the worst thing anxiety does to me. I have often wanted to join a work outing or meet a friend, then when the time draws closer cancel, making up some rubbish as to why i cant go. The more you do this the more and more you become isolated. It is not nice at all. I have sort of started to think its how i am supposed to be! Although i do like "my time" it isnt how it should be 100% of the time!
CBT and/or medication, depending on your condition etc, can help in this. You need a bit of good old fashioned will power to help get better.
I am better than i was but it still happens...i am currently having one of these battles with my own mind over a meeting.

You will get there :hugs:

[hellybelly1982]

At the time when I make the plans I'am fine and I'am looking forward to doing whatever it is I have arranged but as time draws closer more often than not I cancel. I go out with my husband and we have nice days out, its just other stuff like meeting with friends (which I hardly have anymore) or seeing family or like I said before anything that involves me going out in the morning. I know its one of those safety behaviours which end up being completly pointless as it reinforces the negative thought but I cant seem to break it. I hate feeling anxious and I will do anything to avoid feeling it. I like yourself like alone time but I do wish I had some more friends, I just cant keep hold of them because im so flakey. x

[AnxiousBaker]

You are very similar to me and i expect many others! You are lucky you have a husband who you can enjoy time with etc. That is one step better than me, being single it makes it extra tough to go out to meet new people.
I arranged to meet a friend who i have not seen in a long time a month or so ago. I was really looking forward to a few drinks at a place i know well, so nothing to worry about, but the day before the meet my mind would not stop going over and over the "what if" routine. What exactly is going to happen? Nothing! Enjoy a drink with a friend... i fully get your situation i really do!
The only time i can go out is if i have taken some diazepam and id rather not do that all the time. No matter how good it is haha!

[hellybelly1982]

oh tell me about it, i love diazapam but my doctor never gives it to me because of it being so addictive.