Wedding tomorrow!

[ladymillion]

I suffer from agrophobia and panic disorder and i am currently attending CBT sessions for this. I am now on the graded exposure part of this which is scary. When i am severly anxious the worst thought that goes through my head is that i am in desperate need of the toilet and i fear i will lose control of my bladder. ( This has never happend, but the fear is so real). I go to the toilet all the time and i restrict my fluid intake because of this.

Anyway, my uncle is getting married tomorrow and i am worried already! It is going to be a hectic day! We have an hours drive to get to my Aunts house where we are getting ready and then we are going by taxi which is a half hour journey to the venue. One thing i hate is social events now due to anxiety and it is obviously going to feel like a life time to me and will be crowded!! It is a catholic wedding and i have heard these go on for ages!!

A bus has been arranged for all guests to go on to the next place which i am dreading i HATE buses. I am just feeling panicked by the whole thing.

Someone please help, I am only 22 and noone knows of my anxiety except my fiancee and immediate family, due to embarrasement.

[smithylou4]

you need to try and relax a little and think about the situation rather than panicking about the what ifs, think about the day and the worst that can happen, probably not a lot!
The more you worry the more you will need the toilet so try and concentrate on the wedding and what is happening rather than focusing on how nervous you feel. Try to look forward to the wedding, think of all the positive things about the wedding and focus on those. Your panicking about panicking at the moment! I do it all the time I know its crazy.

What do you hate about buses? If its the crowds of people, then just focus on looking out the window or talk to your fiancee, distraction is the best thing!

Try not to tense up and try to just relax a little its the only thing that will help you get through the day, I recently read something about anxiety that made a lot of sense and maybe you could think of this tomorrow.

"When you feel fear its not real. The things you think are happening aren't when something really frightening happens you don't feel fear beause you are in the moment and dealing with it. Fear is a negative emotion and not real."

Try to enjoy yourself and be positive, you will be fine. x

[ladymillion]

Thank you so much for your reply. I know you are right and i need to stop panicking and start focusing on the positives. Which i will try my best to do!! I think the reason i hate buses is the crowds of people. I will just try and talk to my fiancee. I just hope it goes well, and i feel ok. I will let you know how i get on thanks x

[panickyme]

Ahhhh Weddings I love them! You are going to have so much fun!!!! Try really hard to just have fun. Focus on Fun! Hopefully they have an open bar, and you can just get a drink to calm your nerves. Anxiety always makes an event that is coming up seem so much worse then it really turns out to be. (it's the what if thinking) Try this( what if I actually have a really good time!) Just hug your honey/hunni, and enjoy the day. It will be over before you know it, and it will all be behind you. ( I know easier said, then done) but you can do it, I know you can!! Good luck, can't wait to hear how it went. Ugh Catholic weddings are long, but you can go to the toilet anytime you want, as many times as you want, and they are beautiful! HAVE FUN!:yesyes: Debbi

[ladymillion]

Thanks so much Debbi, ur post made me smile. I am in the car on my way to my aunts just now. Im feeling not too bad just now just hopeing for the best! You would think i was going somewhere terrible the way i am going on lol!! Fingers crossed i have a good time. Thanks so much for your support and i will post tomorow to let you guys know how it went xx

[hellybelly1982]

Hope you got on okey. Hit the buffet and the bar and try and focus on being mindful of whats going on around you. Immerse yourself with the atmosphere and whats going on rather than focusing on all the what if's and negative, innaccurate thoughts. I'am not fond of crowds and the thought if going to a wedding is not something that would appeal but maybe do something nice the following day or relaxing that will give you something to look forward to and a treat for being so brave and doing so well :hugs:

[panickyme]

Can't wait to see how everything went. :)

[ladymillion]

Hi everyone, thanks for your supportive posts.
Well i went and i really enjoyed my day. I am glad i went. Dont get me wrong, it was a little anxious in the chapel and i was starting to get quite bad but i held onto my fiancees hand and he made me feel better.

I was dreading the buses they had provided but it turned out all good as i was first at the buses and i choose the smaller one, so it ended up there was only 14 people on the bus instead of a massive double decker bus.

The meal and party night was great i really enjoyed it and i was even up dancing just like i used to.