Madgirl12
11-11-12, 20:47
It started off okay, I went to an exercise class but I'd had to take a couple of painkillers before that, and realised I needed to lie down when I got back home.
So, I had a sore neck (I've been seeing an osteopath for a couple of weeks and could have really done with seeing him yesterday!), sore ears and the left side of my face was sore too, especially round my eye and round my gums and jaw.
So I was in pain but the worst thing was the constant stream of 'stuff' going on in my head. I get this a lot anyway, but when I'm in pain and feeling vulnerable it is worse, it's like I'm caged in with the pain. I've not had an episode like that in a while. So it was a stream of constant past conversations, 'dreamed up' conversations, comparing myself to others, constant worrying about the future and feeling awful. None of it good, all of it was damaging. But I can't find the off switch.
So as this was going on I spent the rest of the day and night tossing and turning in vain, trying to find a way of sleeping that didn't hurt. Kept moving from side to front to back, massaging head and neck, anything to try and get rid of the pain. Eventually I must have been so exhuasted that I managed to get to sleep. Woke up today and I was fine, if a bit achey and tired.
I've had a quiet day today and even managed to get some things done round the house. I just want to stop worrying about everything and having these thoughts playing on my mind. How the hell do I block it all out and just get on with living?
So, I had a sore neck (I've been seeing an osteopath for a couple of weeks and could have really done with seeing him yesterday!), sore ears and the left side of my face was sore too, especially round my eye and round my gums and jaw.
So I was in pain but the worst thing was the constant stream of 'stuff' going on in my head. I get this a lot anyway, but when I'm in pain and feeling vulnerable it is worse, it's like I'm caged in with the pain. I've not had an episode like that in a while. So it was a stream of constant past conversations, 'dreamed up' conversations, comparing myself to others, constant worrying about the future and feeling awful. None of it good, all of it was damaging. But I can't find the off switch.
So as this was going on I spent the rest of the day and night tossing and turning in vain, trying to find a way of sleeping that didn't hurt. Kept moving from side to front to back, massaging head and neck, anything to try and get rid of the pain. Eventually I must have been so exhuasted that I managed to get to sleep. Woke up today and I was fine, if a bit achey and tired.
I've had a quiet day today and even managed to get some things done round the house. I just want to stop worrying about everything and having these thoughts playing on my mind. How the hell do I block it all out and just get on with living?