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clarissa
17-08-06, 19:31
This is a heads-up to those friends who haven't experienced it yet, and an explanation to those friends and family who have...

Most of you have read the scare-mail about the person whose kidneys were stolen while he was passed out. Well, read on.......


While the kidney story was an urban legend, this one is not.


It's happening every day and it has happened to me! My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago.
It was just that quick. I went to sleep in my body and woke up with someone else's thighs. The new ones had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Who would have done such a cruel thing to legs that had been mine for years?

Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine?

I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and angry, ! I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans and Sheer Energy pantyhose.

Then, just when my guard was down, the thieves struck again. My butt was next. I knew it was the same gang because they took pains to match my new rear end (although badly attached at least three inches lower than my original) to the thighs they stuck me with earlier. Now, my rear complemented my legs, lump for lump. Frantic, I prayed that long skirts would stay in fashion.

It was two years ago when I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I was fixing my hair, and I watched horrified but fascinated as the flesh of my upper arms swung to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really getting scary.

My body was being replaced one section at a time. How clever and fiendish.

Age? Age had nothing to do with it. Age is supposed to creep up, unnoticed, something like maturity. NO, I was! being attacked repeatedly and withou t warning

In despair, I gave up my T-shirts. What could they do to me next?

My poor neck disappeared more quickly than the Thanksgiving turkey it now resembled.

That's why I decided to tell my story. I can't take on the medical profession by myself. Women of the world, wake up and smell the coffee.

That really isn't plastic that those surgeons are using. You KNOW where they are getting those replacement parts, don't you?

The next time you suspect someone has had a face "lifted," look again. Was it lifted from you?

I think I finally found my thighs... and I hope that Cindy Crawford paid a really good price for them!

This is not a hoax. This is happening to women in every town every night. WARN YOUR FRIENDS.

P.S. I must say that last year I thought someone had stolen my breasts. I was lying in bed and they were gone! As I jumped out of bed I was relieved to see ! that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept.

Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.



there's a place that I dream of when I sleep, so peaceful, so quite, I call it mother earth.

Coni
17-08-06, 20:08
Clarissa, that is so funny....it really made me laugh, particularly loved the bit about breasts hiding in your waistband lol!!!

Coni X

eeyorelover
17-08-06, 20:25
PMSL :)
Thnx for sharing that !!
xxx
Sandy

manmoor
17-08-06, 20:44
Lmao so so funny. Thank you.

Take Care

Mandy

xx

Southern_Belle
23-08-06, 03:20
Thank you for a huge laugh.

Bel

"Our thoughts are our reality"

suzanne
23-08-06, 09:48
That was really great. It gave me such a laugh. Did you write that yourself, if so very clever.

Well done

suzanne x

s shaw

LockedShut
26-08-06, 11:20
This may be mean, but that reminds me of my mother!

clarissa
26-08-06, 14:06
Sadly I did not write it, but when I am down I often read it, it never fails to make me laugh, I thought that I would share it with fellow fed up panicy people.
If I helped just one other person by putting it there, I am so pleased, I have given up reading some of the other sections as it makes me depressed.
Keep going, up is the best way.

there's a place that I dream of when I sleep, so peaceful, so quite, I call it mother earth.