24track
19-11-12, 13:45
Well, despite having the last few weeks from HELL!! Awful, worsening symptoms, feeling like there is no end to this (now year) of torture, I seem to have turned something of a corner.
A couple of things have occured in the last couple of weeks. The most momentous being that, sadly, my wife and I have decided to separate (after 33 years together!)
I initially thought.. here we go, fasten your seatbelts for even worse anxiety... not sure if I will actually make it through this on top of all the background stress and unpleasantness. So..I braced for substantial impact, psychologically!
I began to read again my Claire Weekes book Self Help for your Nerves... and it seemed to be an absolute godsend this time.
I now really understand that FEAR is the root of all this rubbish.. and by following the advice in the book it has really begun to diminish my symptoms.
I am accepting the terrible feelings and not fighting them, and importantly "floating" through the now occasional attacks of panic that there have been.
I feel sooo much more relaxed!! Stomach has stopped jolting/twitching, much less nausea, neck and shoulder muscles substantially relaxed and not hard and
frozen as before. Also, going outside I would previously feel dizzy, uncertain and generally vulnerable.. but now it's like it used to be a year ago.. I can walk along the street and feel "me" again!! ;) With each day I seem to be feeling more "normal". I understand that there may well be times of regression, but this time I am forewarned and forearmed!!
I'm guessing that by moving on in my marital issues it has been a real mental weight off my thoughts.. not that the future is going to be easy or all of the nasty surprises have been eliminated by any means. but it's incredible the difference that it has made to my anxiety. Only two panics recently, when before I would suffer at least 5 a day, and their severity is much, much less too!!! Yesss!!!!!! ~ Go to hell, panic monster!!!
Just wanted to say... we can beat this thing. Just need to make changes, but of course that's easier said than done, and knowing which to actually make. Just know that it's NOT a lifelong curse.
I wasn't aware that my unhappiness matrimonially was having such a deep effect, but recent events appear to tell something of a tale...
A couple of things have occured in the last couple of weeks. The most momentous being that, sadly, my wife and I have decided to separate (after 33 years together!)
I initially thought.. here we go, fasten your seatbelts for even worse anxiety... not sure if I will actually make it through this on top of all the background stress and unpleasantness. So..I braced for substantial impact, psychologically!
I began to read again my Claire Weekes book Self Help for your Nerves... and it seemed to be an absolute godsend this time.
I now really understand that FEAR is the root of all this rubbish.. and by following the advice in the book it has really begun to diminish my symptoms.
I am accepting the terrible feelings and not fighting them, and importantly "floating" through the now occasional attacks of panic that there have been.
I feel sooo much more relaxed!! Stomach has stopped jolting/twitching, much less nausea, neck and shoulder muscles substantially relaxed and not hard and
frozen as before. Also, going outside I would previously feel dizzy, uncertain and generally vulnerable.. but now it's like it used to be a year ago.. I can walk along the street and feel "me" again!! ;) With each day I seem to be feeling more "normal". I understand that there may well be times of regression, but this time I am forewarned and forearmed!!
I'm guessing that by moving on in my marital issues it has been a real mental weight off my thoughts.. not that the future is going to be easy or all of the nasty surprises have been eliminated by any means. but it's incredible the difference that it has made to my anxiety. Only two panics recently, when before I would suffer at least 5 a day, and their severity is much, much less too!!! Yesss!!!!!! ~ Go to hell, panic monster!!!
Just wanted to say... we can beat this thing. Just need to make changes, but of course that's easier said than done, and knowing which to actually make. Just know that it's NOT a lifelong curse.
I wasn't aware that my unhappiness matrimonially was having such a deep effect, but recent events appear to tell something of a tale...