not fair

[ladypickie]

Feelig really down, friends are going out tonight. They go to the, should we say the more less tastfull pubs. Ive been invited, but because of the icey cold weather and the weather warning for heavy rain laters I have decided not to go. Because of my health I cant treak round in the icey weather. I get really feed up,staying in, but they wont compromise and go somewhere nice and cosy. They only want to do what they want to do, there rather selfish, to say the least. Ive suggested to one of them that we should have a night out to a nice pub soon, but I know she wont. She dosnt seem to like to go to tastefull places and even more so seems to get Jeal if I get any attention. Im tall and slim and she is rather large and always on a diet. She likes to be the centre of attention and gets jeal if I get any. Its really stating to upset me and making me feel anxious to, she knows Im deppreseed and lonley. The pain on my loneleness is really starting to hurt. when i do meet anyone, once they hear about my health probs, they just want to be friends. I understand this, but Im sick of being told Im a lovely girl and thats it....I so worry about whos going to be there for me in the future.....xxx

[panic12]

Hi, sorry to hear you're feeling down, My situation is similar I hate going out around town in nightclubs etc sends my anxiety up the wall, all my friends always go to them and invite me but I never go. Then I sit in the house all night getting worked up and anxious for no good reason. I'm 18 and feel like I should be more like my friends out in nightclubs enjoying myself but just can't, hope you feel better soon :)

[JackInTheBox]

Well, I have a couple of questions for you two, and please don't get me wrong buuut:

1-Do you have incapacitating health condition that makes going out (like on a bender/dancing/meeting people going out) prohibitive?

2-Did you ever considered making an experiment out of it? I mean just going, getting a couple of drinks with friends and just see how it goes?

I'm asking because I have friends that fall into question 1's category, nasty things as heart conditions and/or diabetes, the diabetes guy actually survived a heart attack last month (and he was 36). Both of them would sell their soul to be able to go on a bender with the rest of us.

Regarding point 2, I'm a pretty anxious/obcessive guy myself and sometimes I just don't want to go out, I want to stay home and mutter about whatever I'm obcessing/stressing about...that or get some funky anxiety topic on my head (specially HA) and stay home. I have learned that those are the days we really should go and have all the worst and inimaginable sorts of fun available to man without breaking any laws (that someone notices). Just go and have fun, meet girls or guys (whatever rocks your boat), do some dancing, annoy the cops, the bartender or neighbours...just let yourself go :)

And if by some reason you can't go out (short on $$, awfull weather, etc.)...invite people to your house! Offer them a couch (or the floor, or a bed) for a sleep over and just make a party out of it ;)

The point is....don't let your anxiety lock you up and turn your life into crap! Having/making friends (specially good ones) makes a world of difference when dealing with anxiety and HA!