Edie
25-11-12, 13:22
I've just started university at the age of 31. As well an anxiety/depression, I have Asperger's and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. I applied for support through Disabled Students Allowances and was awarded a mentor who I see weekly to provide disability support.
My first mentor was rubbish. All she would say was, "have self-confidence," but never offered any practical help to overcome the difficulties that were causing anxiety. I now have a new mentor who is extremely effective. I have seen her twice now. But I fear this help may have come too late.
My course is in animal care. I have a lot of experience with cats, and also some experience with small wild animals from my voluntary job at a wildlife rescue/rehabilitation centre. In college I am expected to handle small domestic animals like rabbits and ferrets, and also farm animals such as cows, horses and goats. I have no experience at all with any animals like this, whereas every other student on the course does. Once I have seen other people handling animals I know what to do and feel confident about handling them.
I raised my concerns with my first mentor who told me there was no problem, I was here to learn, and I should stop comparing myself to others and have self-confidence. I still had concerns, but I thought maybe my judgement was off and if I asked my tutors about this they would get annoyed with having to provide constant reassurance, so I didn't talk about this with anyone else at college.
After a really bad week, I spoke to my new mentor about this in our second meeting on Friday afternoon. She told me that during the week she had spoken to my tutors and they also highlighted this as an issue. My tutors have offered me some extra help in this area, which is really great, but I'm going to have to quit my paid job in order to fit this in. I am willing to do this if it's going to be enough to salvage this, but I don't want to risk that it's not going to be enough and I could end up kicked out of uni and have no job. I am trying to arrange meetings at college to discuss this over the next week, but obviously no one's replying over the weekend so it's a bit of a frustrating wait before I can make a decision.
I was already annoyed with my first mentor for being so totally useless, but now I'm even more annoyed with her for failing to take my concerns seriously. I raised this issue in my second week and she brushed it off as anxiety without even checking with my tutors. My tutors' conversations with my mentor this past week show that my concerns were valid all along, and I could have got help weeks ago. I am really grateful that I now have a mentor who takes my concerns seriously, checks whether they are valid, and arranges support for me. But I'm a bit worried it might have come too late and I'm already too far behind. I just feel so angry that my previous mentor prevented me from seeking out this help weeks ago!
I really hope that by the end of next week I will be resigning from my job in order to focus on my studies, and not leaving college.
My first mentor was rubbish. All she would say was, "have self-confidence," but never offered any practical help to overcome the difficulties that were causing anxiety. I now have a new mentor who is extremely effective. I have seen her twice now. But I fear this help may have come too late.
My course is in animal care. I have a lot of experience with cats, and also some experience with small wild animals from my voluntary job at a wildlife rescue/rehabilitation centre. In college I am expected to handle small domestic animals like rabbits and ferrets, and also farm animals such as cows, horses and goats. I have no experience at all with any animals like this, whereas every other student on the course does. Once I have seen other people handling animals I know what to do and feel confident about handling them.
I raised my concerns with my first mentor who told me there was no problem, I was here to learn, and I should stop comparing myself to others and have self-confidence. I still had concerns, but I thought maybe my judgement was off and if I asked my tutors about this they would get annoyed with having to provide constant reassurance, so I didn't talk about this with anyone else at college.
After a really bad week, I spoke to my new mentor about this in our second meeting on Friday afternoon. She told me that during the week she had spoken to my tutors and they also highlighted this as an issue. My tutors have offered me some extra help in this area, which is really great, but I'm going to have to quit my paid job in order to fit this in. I am willing to do this if it's going to be enough to salvage this, but I don't want to risk that it's not going to be enough and I could end up kicked out of uni and have no job. I am trying to arrange meetings at college to discuss this over the next week, but obviously no one's replying over the weekend so it's a bit of a frustrating wait before I can make a decision.
I was already annoyed with my first mentor for being so totally useless, but now I'm even more annoyed with her for failing to take my concerns seriously. I raised this issue in my second week and she brushed it off as anxiety without even checking with my tutors. My tutors' conversations with my mentor this past week show that my concerns were valid all along, and I could have got help weeks ago. I am really grateful that I now have a mentor who takes my concerns seriously, checks whether they are valid, and arranges support for me. But I'm a bit worried it might have come too late and I'm already too far behind. I just feel so angry that my previous mentor prevented me from seeking out this help weeks ago!
I really hope that by the end of next week I will be resigning from my job in order to focus on my studies, and not leaving college.