Having a horrible day..

[ReissG]

Seeing my therapist later!
I swear my anxiety won't leave me alone. I get over one fear and another one comes along, it will never ever end :(
I've had this gland in my neck since I was about 9 (probably younger but this is when we noticed it) and it was huge, my mum thought it was bloody cancer lol (wonder where I get my worrying from) anyway the Dr told her it's a very common lump in boys (something google DOESN'T mention, funny that) and it's just a normal gland!
Well leaving the Dr's yesterday I was a free HA patient, I had nothing else to worry about...
My anxiety crept up on me yesterday, telling me to touch it, touch the lump I've had since I was a little boy, so I did and now my head keeps telling me it's got bigger and it's growing AND I'M BELIEVING IT!
I'm noticing other little lumps around it, digging around in areas and finding more lumps!
I was only touching it 5 or 6 days ago and It was fine!
I hate it, it feels like a never ending bad dream, one problem goes and my head makes me find another.
I don't want to go to the Dr again with another "lymphoma" scare because this is getting ridiculous now. Although the anxiety isn't like it normally is, it's still there, at a controllable level.
Seeing my therapist maybe he will help me out, maybe just talking about it will stop it from effecting me....sigh I don't know anymore, I'm finding it hard to cope. I made sure my next Dr's appointment was BEFORE christmas so I could have an anxious free christmas and I'm starting to thank myself for that!

Anyone else ever get like this? Where your mind just goes looking for things to worry about? :wall: :meh: :shrug:

[Elle-Kay]

Yes, it's very common for anxiety to "transfer" from one thing to another. The reason for this is that the anxiety isn't caused specifically by the trigger thing in the first place - it's caused by an exagerrated underlying natural response to things we consider as posing a threat to us. For example, my anxiety makes it very hard for me to travel away from my "safe" place, but the anxiety isn't triggered by being away from home itself, it's triggered by the perceived threat of being anxious whilst away from home. This leads me to stay within my safe zone, which reinforces to my mind that travelling beyond that is somehow a threat to me, which in turn leads me to be anxious about travelling. It really is a Catch-22 situation, and the only way to jump out of the loop is to learn - through hard work and constant positive reinforcement - that the anxiety trigger isn't a threat. Hopefully your therapist can work on this with you.

[pepperutchie]

same here with me...as i have my health anxiety these days bigtime, from being obsessed with one pain into another and as long as you got yourself busy from investigating everything and giving them the much needed attention it will grow and grow and even give you a whole pile of tthings to worry.Youl be fine

[Stands mum]

Sorry you are feeling so bad today.