suicide attempts n self harming

[khne08794]

Need sum advice. Ive always had suicidal thoughts. And really bad anxiety n nerves All my life. Im 27 years old
But for the last 6 month ive gotten worse ive tried everything from threatning to jump of
Bridges to stabing my self. Im ashamed. To put my family through it. I split up from my gf after 9 years bcos she cheated. So i took it heart. I drank everynight blaming my self. It come to being seen by doctors 4 times in a week the police werent to happy kickking my door in so many times . I just gave up on life me friends dident understand me .My dad took me away on holiday to sort is out but had to cover me arms and me. Body i was frightend in case
Ppl judge me. Alcohol has a part of my life n it does make do things i wudent do sober. Just dont know what to do

[Thumbelina]

Hi khne,

You are very brave to come and share on here.
You have to trust the people around you, your family, doctors - they only want whats the best for you. You have to follow everything they ask you to do now.
So many people break up wih their partners and have many other tragedies and later overcome grief, anger and dospair, so you can do it as well. Follow advises of your family just foe the sake of fhem if you dont see any point At the moment.
You can have new happy relationship and enjoy your life again, just listen to people who care about you and let your feelings your have now to pass as any ofher illness, and you will be ok soon.
The strenghts inside you has no limits.

[Anxious_gal]

If you still have a drink problem find a good rehab and go there for a few weeks.

I would also suggest going to some kind of in treatment program in a hospital for your mental health. Again they aren't all the same so have a look and try to find a good one.

Once the basics is done, lots of therapy,CBT and life style changes.

Also get a full health check up and get your testosterone levels checked, and tyroid as both can cause anxiety and depression.

You might have to fight to get the help you need, I know that's hard when you have depression, it's time to be your own best friend.

Don't be too hard on friends n family often people can't relate and have no idea how to help and really you should be being looked after by professionals.

Stabbings and sucide attempts :( that's some serious depression.

Are you on meds? Sometimes meds can make you worse too.
But meds do work best on people with very bad depression compared to mild or moderate depression.

[khne08794]

Ive had proponal. But wudnt get prescribed them any more bcos of overdozes. Unless i go to chemist everyday. And yeah im trying to cut out the alcohol. Im in a alcohol awareness course. They offerd rehab but ive nocked it back the reason y i drink so much alcohol us bcos i get really bad anxiety when nervous. Eg. Shakes . sweatsi havent worked in 10 bcos of it so its reallly affecting my day to day life. Apparently its panic attacks. For sum 1 like me were everyfriend goes places ,does things ,works and im just not normal. Ive had counselling. N everything

[speckles69uk]

Hey khne08794,

Welcome to the site, I'm sure you'll find lots of advice and support on here.

I'm also the same age as you, 27 and I often feel like this too and do have issues with thoughts of suicide and do self harm. I've never had a serious suicide attempt requiring hospital treatment, but I have often been on the edge.

Please don't be ashamed of your thoughts. I do understand what you mean about people judging you, but please don't let them. You are you, they don't know how you're feeling inside and they don't know what you go through everyday, so how can they be qualified to judge you. I don't think anybody should judge anybody in life. It's important that you focus just on you to enable you to get better, be selfish. As for normal, there's no such thing as normal, if everbody was the same, the world would be one big boring place.

I won' be a hypocrite and tell you to cut the alcohol out, because I use it too to cope. Yes it does mask the problems and make you feel better sometimes, especially when nervous and anxious, but deep down it doesn't work in the long run. As you said, it can make you do things that you wouldn't normally do, and when you're already feeling down, alcohol and bad feelings are not a good combination. I did see someone from an agency called ADS, he helped me to start by cutting my alcohol intake down. For me personally, I couldn't cut it out completely, but cutting it down does help. I went through a bad patch and stopped going, but I do implement the techniques I have learnt. Can I ask which alcohol awareness course you do?

Until I have dealt with the issues inside, the alcohol, suicidal thoughts and self harm will still remain. I'm only just starting to get some proper help for it. I'm currently on a waiting list for DBT, which is meant to be the type of therapy suited for treating conditions involving suicidal thoughts / attempts, self harm, drugs and alcohol, plus a load of other issue. Can I ask what support you do get? I am assuming you have access to a CMHT. I know you say you've had counselling, but have you been offered any form of therapy for helping with how you feel. I've had CBT and that worked for the panic attacks and confronting places and going out more, but not for my other issues. I can't vouch for DBT, because I haven't done it yet, but I am holding out hope because I do want to get better, I hate feeling like this.

If you ever want to contact me or PM, you're very welcome to.

Take care

Rebecca