Help I desperately need some hope

[memyself]

I really hope someone can offer me some hope for the future as at the moment I am extremely low and am having frequent thoughts of suicide and severe anxiety. I am currently on Propanolol, Diazepam and Trazodone. Over the last two years I have been on a lot of different anti-anxiety, anti-depressant, and mood stabilisers. I have seen 5 different psychiatrists and have been hospitalised 3 times for low mood. I am gradually becoming less able to do anything, going out to the shops is just so terrifying and a lot of the time I can't eat for the anxiety. I feel I am a total burden on my family who find it very difficult to hear me talk about my dark thoughts. Today I phoned Samaritans as I was so desperate to talk to someone. I feel I have lost myself to this illness and will never recover. Life is just about suffering and I have no fight left.

[BobbyDog]

I am sorry that life is so difficult for you at the moment. No matter how hard it is keep talking to your family about how you feel, because if you stop it will be more stressful for all involved including yourself.

Stay in contact with people here at NMP and perhaps go in chat for an informal conversation with people who may understand what you are going through.

[Baggs]

There is always hope. With me it was finding the right med, which is Duloxetine. As Bobby says, maybe come into chat - sometimes talking to others who understand can be a relief, you are no longer alone.

Baggs

[Emphyrio]

Yes - you should always hold hope. Sometimes it takes a while before you find the right meds that suits you - also, some people respond better to certain doses than others - for instance, I read that in terms of prozac - some people needed 2.5mg/day while others needed 80.

Also, have you thought about supplements? You should give magnesium glycinate a try - a lot of people with treatment resistant depression respond to it according to some research. Also, fish oil and multivitamins can help (esp b vitamins) - these can usually be taken alongside any medication you're on.