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View Full Version : After having kids are your HA now about them?



lealea
29-08-06, 04:12
Hi all,

I have suffered with health anxiety for many years and have 'had' many illnesses (which funnily enough I never actually had)... The anxiety was always under control (but barely).

Since having my son, who is now 1, I have found that I have transferred all my health anxieties from being about myself to now being about him. In his short little life I have already thought that he has had autism, several viruses and now Im freaking out about Meningococcal. In the past year I have not worried at all about my own health but an obsessing more than ever about his.

Over the past week or so, after a news story about a girl dying of meningococcal disease, I have been overcome with worry that my son will contract it. I am constantly checking his temperature and checking his skin for spots. I can feel it getting out of control, which lead me to find this forum to express my worries.

My husband is sick to death of hearing me talk about anything health related and I feel that I have no one I can talk to - either for reassurance or about health anxiety.

Lea

Lea

carly123
29-08-06, 09:27
Hi Lea,

I have three children (all boys- think of the injuries!) and I am just the same. I still worry about my own health, in fact probably now more than ever, but now have the added stress of worrying about theirs too. It's fairly under control when they're ok, but the second one of them shows signs of illness, I freak out. I'm careful not to scare them, but my partner thinks I'm nuts the way I panic and fuss. And yes, my main worry is meningitis too.
On the plus side, though(if you could call it that), they've all got through some nasty illness or injury-
My eldest- 11wks early...constant chest and ear infections in first year, (more recently)fitting when temp. is high.
Middle one- nearly cut his finger off after falling with a glass in his hand (my god I've never seen so much blood!)...bad reaction to mmr-his feet swelled and covered in blisters, had viral meningitis, 5 days in hospital.
Youngest- first four months, if he choked on his bottle he'd vomit the entire contents of his stomach (projectile).

But, hey, it [OK] they're all fine.

Unfortunately, that doesn't stop me almost having a coronary every time I hear the slightest squeak!

Don't worry, it's natural - it's just that for people with HA it's exagerrated and more difficult to live with.

If you ever feel you need help to calm down and get things into perspective, just post on here and someone should be able to help...

Take care,

Carlyxx

jackie
29-08-06, 10:13
funny enough i have never done this as i am so determined not to put my kids through this

but i know how hard it would be not to fear for your kids and obsess about them. you must really love him to worry so much

are you in councilling?

I HOPE YOU CAN LEARN TO GET A HOLD OF THIS I REALLY DO< TRY TO SEE HIM AS THE HEALTHY SON THAT HE IS

JACKIE

jackie
29-08-06, 10:15
OPPS AND BY THE WAY< YOU CAN TALK TO US ANY TIME

JACKIE

Princess1970
30-12-16, 15:14
Hi, I'm new here and have exactly these worries about my own 9yo daughter, she has had all available meningitis vaccines and I'm still terrified. She's the youngest of 4, never worried like this about the others (all in their 20s now). I just cannot get a lid on this. I know that statistically it's highly unlikely she'll contract it but live in constant fear. ��

Lam123
30-12-16, 15:38
I do the same thing, I'm usually calm, but as soon as something changes with him, I'm a mess. That's where I find myself so overwhelmed, worrying about him and myself.

JuliaSugarbaker
30-12-16, 15:44
My younger daughter started my HA! A swollen lymph node in her neck that I was sure was lymphoma. Turned out the poor girl had an ear infection that lasted a few months and she needed tubes in her ears.

I've been a mess ever since, but I fighting hard to beat this, we all will.

swajj
31-12-16, 00:29
Is your HA only about your child's health or is it about your own as well? Regardless, you need to think about how you are going to affect your child's mental health if you don't stop your irrational fears. I could have gone down that road when my anxiety was at its worst. I actually started to but I recognised that it was my HA and I did not want to project that onto my child. So I told myself I would not be able to forgive myself if my irrational health concerns affected my child's mental health. It would have been extremely selfish to do so. All parents worry about their children's health to a certain degree. Of course we want them to be healthy but that should include wanting them to be both physically and mentally healthy.

NoraB
31-12-16, 07:17
Since having my son, who is now 1, I have found that I have transferred all my health anxieties from being about myself to now being about him. In his short little life I have already thought that he has had autism, several viruses and now Im freaking out about Meningococcal. In the past year I have not worried at all about my own health but an obsessing more than ever about his.

My son is autistic and he's one of the happiest kids I know. ;)


Over the past week or so, after a news story about a girl dying of meningococcal disease, I have been overcome with worry that my son will contract it. I am constantly checking his temperature and checking his skin for spots. I can feel it getting out of control, which lead me to find this forum to express my worries.

I think most parents will go through a phase where they do this. I remember lurking outside my son's door to see if he was still breathing when he was a baby. I agree with swajj though that you have to be careful that you don't transfer your HA to your child. It's highly unlikely that your child will contract meningitis but it is likely they will develop irrational fears as a result of yours so you do need to tread carefully here.

ScaredLizard
01-01-17, 02:43
I have two children that are living and one that died. I worry about them obsessively but if they aren't home or are doing well my anxiety turns back towards myself.

Last night both my kids got sick and I FREAKED out that it was ecolai food poisoning. It wasn't and they are fine today. It was hormone related.