I feel so low and lost

[dread]

I don't know what to do with myself.
Ive had GAD for over 4 years. Was on 60mg cit, then weaned off, relapsed after 2 months and now back on Citalopram 20mg.
I had a relapse and just went back to work after a month off sick. I was feeling really positive a few days ago, and then suddenly though (during a training thing at work) that this was it and I was never going to get any better. I just feel like I'm not really here, that everything going on is disconnected from me. I think about what it would be like if the worst was to happen, and often find myself imagining how other people felt when they went through those experiences and it just makes me feel worse. I feel like a prisoner of my own mind, hopeless and lonely... I don't feel like any of this is going to get better. I keep telling myself "will any of this matter in 5 years?" but then the whole train of negative thinking just runs down any positives....gah. Sorry for the rant, I just need a bit of help today :weep:

[Baggs]

Hi dread,
There are two things that help me - Duloxetine and the chatroom. Talking to others who understand is a great comfort. I wish you all the best.

Baggs

[cattia]

Hey dread, I am sorry you feel like this. I agree that the chatroom is really helpful. I think when you feel so down and low it can be hard not to feel alone and connecting with others who feel the same way can really help. If you can, try to see this as a setback. No matter how hard things are, they will get better. You haven't always felt this way and you won't always in the future. These blips happen but it doesn't mean you're hitting rock bottom again.