View Full Version : Really panicky, need urgent help!
Ever since I've had these swollen lymph glands a month ago things have gone downhill for me. I just had a panic attack and haven't had one in a whole year, I cant stop crying and I don't know what to think or do. I have seriously bad abdominal pain, have had it for weeks, legs feel numb and have a bad pain left groin. Have had really bad back pain and just generally feel like crap! I was diagnosed with IBS ages ago but don't really understand when I'm having the bouts as I have certain allergies and can never tell when its bad or not, or how to control it. I'm terrified for my life I have ovarian cancer after reading some scary stories on the internet, I don't know why I did it but I just cant stop searching cancers and the symptoms on what to look out for. I'm going to go to the doctors but don't want to break down in tears and tell her I'm worried about ovarian cancer because none of them take me seriously there so I don't know what to do, what I should ask her etc but I need to go because I cant stand this, I cant relax I'm a complete mess at the moment. I get so depressed that I literally start to think ''well if I die its not much of a loss because I'm already suffering with this anxiety anyway'' please help anyone, what should I say to the doctor tomorrow about all this? I don't want to go back on meds, should I go back to therapy? :weep:
---------- Post added at 21:44 ---------- Previous post was at 21:04 ----------
It feels like such a real thought, not like the other times, I really feel like somethings wrong please help!
Ok- I can COMPLETELY understand and sympathise with how you're feeling at the moment. Last year I had an unexplained pain in my abdomen and became convinced that I had bowel cancer. I went to doctor after doctor and had test after test becoming ever more hysterical and convinced that the doctors were missing something. Eventually I stopped being able to sleep or eat and I got to the point where I couldn't leave the house. I asked my husband what he would do with the house after I died and asked his help in drawing up a will- I gave up as I was in such hell that even if I wasn't dying of cancer, I couldn't keep going as I was anyway. I was barely making it to the end of each day. No one listened to me until one day my husband was at breaking point and called the doctors surgery and made an appointment with the first gp available. It was then I met my amazing doctor who medicated me in the short term but felt the longer term solution was CBT. I couldn't control how upset I was in front of the doctors but it was the thing that got me fast tracked into CBT and my gp was so concerned that she would see me every couple of weeks as well just to make sure I was ok. In fact she still does this.
So you aren't alone and I know how it feels to be SO convinced you're ill and not to be able to stop googling. I am on bowel cancer websites every day. Every single day. I even do this when I'm not having a scare and I have no idea why. And even though I have a husband and now a beautiful baby boy who I love more than anything, life feels too hard to cope at the moment, I hate it. I'm currently in the middle of another bout of anxiety about bowel cancer and haven't eaten properly for days. I'm also not sleeping and I can't look after my baby properly. It's just desperate. I'm seeing my doctor on Monday and don't want to go on medication either but if it is what's necessary to get me through the short term, I'll do it. But I'll be pushing for therapy as I think that's the only long term solution.
I'd tell your doctor exactly what you've written above and if you're upset so be it. For me I found that being as upset as I was was the only way to get the attention I needed. And I know that you won't be able to accept this at the moment but the mind is an exceptionally powerful thing and it will be turning what are perfectly innocent IBS symptoms (and I have ALL of them and they are IBS!) into something way worse. Anxiety will also give you a whole load of other symptoms that feel like the end of the world but it is just anxiety I promise you. I was crying coming home tonight because I don't want to live like this anymore and I need to get help. Please don't feel alone and don't feel like you can't get better because you can. What you're feeling right now will go you just need some coping strategies to get you over this hurdle and then the next. But you will be able to get over it I promise, just don't stop until you get a supportive doctor and the help you need.
When you feel the pains, just try try try to remember its your head doing this and that IBS is the only thing wrong with you (and that definitely can't kill you!)
Keep in touch x
---------- Post added at 21:56 ---------- Previous post was at 21:54 ----------
Oh and the "it feels real this time" sensation is something I totally identify with too. That sensation feels worse every time I have an HA attack. It is just your head and the way it is wired at the moment. It is just your head.
Wow I really didn't expect that, thank you so much for your honest reply. It's good to know I'm not the only one that suffers like this and I really do feel for you. I hope things get better for you soon and you can be truly happy with your family again :)!
I've been told from day 1 that my symptoms are all anxiety related but for some reason I'll never except that.. I just think that if I put EVERY one of my symptoms down to anxiety and ignore it, and if it is actually something serious, I wont get the medical help I need and it might be too late :(!
But right now I'm worrying that because I've had IBS for so long now and if it is actually ovarian cancer that hasn't been picked up then it must be spread all over my body and I wont get a chance. But I know how that sounds when its on paper and does look a bit irrational.
Again thanks for the reply and I'll definatly take into account what you've said
Take care x
I feel EXACTLY the same. I feel the same now. My issues last year were also attributed to IBS and anxiety and part of me hasn't accepted that either. You feel like you have to keep checking as its your body and you're the only one who can feel your symptoms and the doctors just aren't getting it. I understand that fear. But doctors are much better at this than I think we give them credit for. Misdiagnoses are much rarer than we are led to believe by the media. In fact they make headlines because they are so rare. I went to the doctors last week crying and explaining that I had bowel cancer, listing all the reasons why. The doctor told me I didn't and I actually argued with him! He said he'd practiced and studied for many many years and my symptoms were just not how bowel cancer ever presents. Was I going to trust his experience or google and the daily mail? Fear will make you doubt and when you feel like you're in fear of your life that's a hard feeling to kick but we have to try as otherwise we will be trapped in a very vicious circle.
---------- Post added at 22:28 ---------- Previous post was at 22:18 ----------
P.S what I find helps calm me down sometimes is to think of the symptoms you have and all the other things it actually could be and what's more likely. It was a CBT exercise. It made me see how innocuous symptoms like a headache or a twinge or being sick could be attributed to all sorts of illnesses but actually what's more likely? It helps calm me down sometimes and stops me from feeling like the big c is all it could be.
So I'd make a list and at the top would put "I think I have...bowel cancer." Then I'd force myself to list anything else it could be and IBS was always the top of the list and then I could have a stomach bug or period pains or something I'd eaten or indigestion...
Hi, I've been to the doctors explained how worried I was about ovarian cancer, but she was more happy that my lymph nodes had gone rather than question this new worry. She explained it was IBS and didn't think to run any physical exam on me. I'm trying to find a diet that will help ease this IBS, do you know of anything that will help? My mind is so more at ease but the whole ovarian cancer thing is still at the back of my mind, I don't think it will go until the IBS symptoms go because then there'll be nothing there to worry about. Thanks for all of your advice, I'm going to keep a diary and write down my symptoms and instead of google put down what the symptoms are more likely to be. I'm also going back to therapy again to continue with CBT. Thanks for all your help and I hope you also feel better soon x
IBS is easily created from anxiety :(
So I don't think its your diet that needs work my dear.
Work on the anxiety and that will help your ibs x
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