nok_tok
12-01-13, 05:40
i suffer with anxiety panic etc im am in a complete state i cant stop shaking and been sick.....
me and my husband have been together 12 years...anyway a few months ago my partner joined facebook for the first time, i have been on there since 2008 (my partner knows this) and only have people i know on there (old school friends and college friends etc) he seemed ok with it!
i am open with him and say 'you can check evrything' he even knows my password...but still not enough, for 2 nights in a row i have woke up at around 2am finding him logged in on my go checking through messages
he says ' i know you have deleted messages'
tonight he tried to tell me that a guy from my friends ( that we both know from years ago) has messaged him asking if i was still with him or if i was single (my profile says married) i was shocked and laughed..i then figured it was a lie (which he told me it was) so he was trying to test me!!
well he thinks he has delved into something, i have been hiding? what? i have no idea, he looks reguartly through my whole profile, including messages looking for something....he says he can 'smell a rat' and knows i have been upto something...he has attempted to change my password (caught him doing this) he gets really annoyed that i have spoken (innocently) to male college friends in a message (2+years ago) nothing to hide! i leave all my old messages on there...
i deactivated my account as i couldnt take anymore, i said i dont care about facebook and just want things back to normal...but at 3am i woke to him on my facebook (reactivated by him) posting photos on there and asking why i wrote 'happy birthday x' to a male friend he said by writing the 'x' i am giving them the wrong idea...i write this to female friends also though...but i doesnt mean anything...
i sat on the bed tonight and he really had a go at me...i started shaking and no matter what i say he says i have changed on deleted somthing so i started to cry..i said ' i dont know what i can do right'
i started to check on my profile with him next to me on the laptop and he grabbed it away and pushed me back hard, so i pulled him back from his back and clicked his neck by accident (he had cirvical spodolsis) a pain at top of spine/neck condition which has been suffering with for about a year (but recently got better) and now he is in pain and sleeping on a bag of peas...
i am shaking and been sick and cant sleep i feel a nerveous wreck and if it wasnt for my kids i would probably top myself....worse bit is
that when i accidently hurt his neck i felt extremely guilty and feel sick as i am worried he is going to hurt tomorrow and he will hurt for weeks or something??
he has just started a new job aswell and now im just shaking and being sick
why is he being like this with me?
---------- Post added at 04:37 ---------- Previous post was at 04:29 ----------
by the way tonight he has been drinking around 8+ cans of lager and smoked some weed....i hate this
---------- Post added at 05:01 ---------- Previous post was at 04:37 ----------
he checked my profile after work...he seemed really off with me...
he says 'who's this' who's that'
is anyone giving you hassle on there?
when i looked at the computer after him he had deleted all seach history...is he hiding something?? or just trying to hide what he has looked at?
i have been throwing up all night due to feeling anxious,and keep going to the loo aswell...not sure what to do with myseld, this has really shook me up..my arms/hands are shaking
i keep thinking my husband will keep on as he has been 'on' at me about facebook for over a month now, we re-kindled our relationship and we were cool,(better than ever) then he becomes re-obsessed with it!!
i have 3 kids i rarely go out the house except the supermarket or school run, but i recently met up with a female friend, we were out 2 hours and my husband rang me 3 times asking when i was coming back!
iam happy in my relationship...have absolutely no desire to cheat, flurt or keep secrets....not sure where i am going wrong
i have now looked ignorant by cutting off my frienship with my (female) friend...it was good to have some friends/female company, i felt good getting out, change of environment....
i am going to a 'wellbeing clinic' next month for my depression hope thay can help me!!
---------- Post added at 05:40 ---------- Previous post was at 05:01 ----------
i keep wondering why is he doing this?
-could he be having a relationship of fb himself?
-has he got bored of me
- is he only just appreciating me?
-is he pananoid? (im worried it will get worse)
i feel bad that i accidently clicked his neck, last time he hurt it he had to quit his job due to the pain he was in for over 6 mths, he has just stated a new job this week!
me and my husband have been together 12 years...anyway a few months ago my partner joined facebook for the first time, i have been on there since 2008 (my partner knows this) and only have people i know on there (old school friends and college friends etc) he seemed ok with it!
i am open with him and say 'you can check evrything' he even knows my password...but still not enough, for 2 nights in a row i have woke up at around 2am finding him logged in on my go checking through messages
he says ' i know you have deleted messages'
tonight he tried to tell me that a guy from my friends ( that we both know from years ago) has messaged him asking if i was still with him or if i was single (my profile says married) i was shocked and laughed..i then figured it was a lie (which he told me it was) so he was trying to test me!!
well he thinks he has delved into something, i have been hiding? what? i have no idea, he looks reguartly through my whole profile, including messages looking for something....he says he can 'smell a rat' and knows i have been upto something...he has attempted to change my password (caught him doing this) he gets really annoyed that i have spoken (innocently) to male college friends in a message (2+years ago) nothing to hide! i leave all my old messages on there...
i deactivated my account as i couldnt take anymore, i said i dont care about facebook and just want things back to normal...but at 3am i woke to him on my facebook (reactivated by him) posting photos on there and asking why i wrote 'happy birthday x' to a male friend he said by writing the 'x' i am giving them the wrong idea...i write this to female friends also though...but i doesnt mean anything...
i sat on the bed tonight and he really had a go at me...i started shaking and no matter what i say he says i have changed on deleted somthing so i started to cry..i said ' i dont know what i can do right'
i started to check on my profile with him next to me on the laptop and he grabbed it away and pushed me back hard, so i pulled him back from his back and clicked his neck by accident (he had cirvical spodolsis) a pain at top of spine/neck condition which has been suffering with for about a year (but recently got better) and now he is in pain and sleeping on a bag of peas...
i am shaking and been sick and cant sleep i feel a nerveous wreck and if it wasnt for my kids i would probably top myself....worse bit is
that when i accidently hurt his neck i felt extremely guilty and feel sick as i am worried he is going to hurt tomorrow and he will hurt for weeks or something??
he has just started a new job aswell and now im just shaking and being sick
why is he being like this with me?
---------- Post added at 04:37 ---------- Previous post was at 04:29 ----------
by the way tonight he has been drinking around 8+ cans of lager and smoked some weed....i hate this
---------- Post added at 05:01 ---------- Previous post was at 04:37 ----------
he checked my profile after work...he seemed really off with me...
he says 'who's this' who's that'
is anyone giving you hassle on there?
when i looked at the computer after him he had deleted all seach history...is he hiding something?? or just trying to hide what he has looked at?
i have been throwing up all night due to feeling anxious,and keep going to the loo aswell...not sure what to do with myseld, this has really shook me up..my arms/hands are shaking
i keep thinking my husband will keep on as he has been 'on' at me about facebook for over a month now, we re-kindled our relationship and we were cool,(better than ever) then he becomes re-obsessed with it!!
i have 3 kids i rarely go out the house except the supermarket or school run, but i recently met up with a female friend, we were out 2 hours and my husband rang me 3 times asking when i was coming back!
iam happy in my relationship...have absolutely no desire to cheat, flurt or keep secrets....not sure where i am going wrong
i have now looked ignorant by cutting off my frienship with my (female) friend...it was good to have some friends/female company, i felt good getting out, change of environment....
i am going to a 'wellbeing clinic' next month for my depression hope thay can help me!!
---------- Post added at 05:40 ---------- Previous post was at 05:01 ----------
i keep wondering why is he doing this?
-could he be having a relationship of fb himself?
-has he got bored of me
- is he only just appreciating me?
-is he pananoid? (im worried it will get worse)
i feel bad that i accidently clicked his neck, last time he hurt it he had to quit his job due to the pain he was in for over 6 mths, he has just stated a new job this week!