View Full Version : How long have u been off/out of work???????????????????
Just wondering ....
how long we're you out of/off work, because of your anxiety/panic disorder OR did your anxiety/panic cause you to eventually leave work, for good???
I had to quit my PGCE teacher training becausef a breakdown and severe panic attacks. This resultedin shocking and heartbreaking anxiety and partial agrophobia, would only because i had to, do school run. I've got small kids but, although I've always been maga ambitious now after a year and a half off, I actually enjoy being at home now!!!Yep money & mortgage issues and hubby on brink of redundancy BUT still, I don't know what to do now? References ? If I'm ready to go back? What should I go back and do?? I've got a good science degree and been doing 1 day a week volunteering as a student support worker at an out of school center. But I'm at a loss, don't know If I can be botherd with a career anymore and thats odd me saying that!!!They've made everything so hard now, experience this and that, masters degree courses cost loads? Just don't know.:weep:
I have been off since June now and would like to think I had a lot less stressful job to go back to.
Ive been off for a couple of years, I moved from England to Wales so had to leave my job then, and having suffered with anxiety/panic for several years I was advised by my doctor here to claim sickness benefits till I get better.
The thing is I have only gotten worse since then, I have tried to get help many times, ie professional help, but never gotten anywhere. I used to have a very good job previously, high stress, but I loved it, now I cant imagine ever doing anything similar.
Apart from my anxiety/panic problems, I have a very bad social anxiety problem, where I cannot be around strangers, especially groups of people, so I just locked myself away a long time ago and its never gotten better.
Now I am receiving some sort of help I hope to get better in time and back into the real world, but not until I am completely prepared and ready.
Ive been off for a couple of years, I moved from England to Wales so had to leave my job then, and having suffered with anxiety/panic for several years I was advised by my doctor here to claim sickness benefits till I get better.
The thing is I have only gotten worse since then, I have tried to get help many times, ie professional help, but never gotten anywhere. I used to have a very good job previously, high stress, but I loved it, now I cant imagine ever doing anything similar.
Apart from my anxiety/panic problems, I have a very bad social anxiety problem, where I cannot be around strangers, especially groups of people, so I just locked myself away a long time ago and its never gotten better.
Now I am receiving some sort of help I hope to get better in time and back into the real world, but not until I am completely prepared and ready.
Gosh it's funny , I'm the same you look back at what you used to do or what you've achieved and think ' gosh, how did I do that'??I feel like a complete different person in some respects, feel body snatched , or something. I just feel like its just me! I read on here work issues or people being at work and the latter, I feel so envious. I'm sorry you've had such a hard & difficult time but it's nice and comforting for me to know we're not alone. I sometimes feel like a failure never quite got ..... THAT BIG CAREER , for one reason or another and now because of anxiety my perspective has changed & I might never get back! Also I'm simply exhausted and thought being home anxiety or not that, it would do my head in but...... I actually like it, which has seriously surprised me! Oh life's tough and weird.
Takecare of yourself x
I was given a one week 'fit note' in May last year and convinced myself I was just a little off colour and slightly stressed.
I didn't take the fit note and went to work and completely unravelled. I lasted 3 days before I pretty much broke down. My anxiety wasn't a huge issue but a massive massive depression took hold, it was really scary. Then once my depression lifted, the anxiety slapped in and really wrestled me down.
My scores on CBT therapist tests the GAD and PHD ones have never come below 20 but I've been feeling a lot lot better and thought I was ready for work.
Alas, had a Occ Health and he ruled me out for at least 6 months. So it'll be around a year.
I don't know what to go back to, I feel like changing a job or finding a less stressful one would be like a safety behaviour
paula lynne
15-01-13, 22:11
I left nursing for what I thought would be a month off to re-charge the batteries, and of course anxiety and panic quickly developed into agoraophobia, and I never went back, that was TEN YEARS AGO......omg just realised!
Im a florist from home now, and in a way, Im grateful I got ill, because working on that ward would have given me an ulcer, drinking problem/heart attack by now......flowers are so much nicer than enemas and bed pans, dont you think Col? :winks:
Like Annie, I haven't done paid work since June. I left because of my employer's response to my mental health crisis. I've done some volunteering since, but I enjoy having the time to myself to pursue other things and as my husband is working full-time I haven't been pressured to find a job to support us as I was before whilst he (and I) was at University. I have an interview next week for a bursary award, to go towards the costs of setting up my own business :)
I was given a one week 'fit note' in May last year and convinced myself I was just a little off colour and slightly stressed.
I didn't take the fit note and went to work and completely unravelled. I lasted 3 days before I pretty much broke down. My anxiety wasn't a huge issue but a massive massive depression took hold, it was really scary. Then once my depression lifted, the anxiety slapped in and really wrestled me down.
My scores on CBT therapist tests the GAD and PHD ones have never come below 20 but I've been feeling a lot lot better and thought I was ready for work.
Alas, had a Occ Health and he ruled me out for at least 6 months. So it'll be around a year.
I don't know what to go back to, I feel like changing a job or finding a less stressful one would be like a safety behaviour
Hi, gosh I feel for you because now I've had a break for going on 2 years I'm stuck exactly like you, when you say that you don't know what to go back to or a complete change of job, Im exactly the same as you. Also at first I thought ohhh this breakdown /anxiety stuff will be gone in a few weeks, I my need to rest and recharge my batteries! Ha ha, was I nieve or what, more like 2 years:weep:
---------- Post added at 22:29 ---------- Previous post was at 22:27 ----------
I left nursing for what I thought would be a month off to re-charge the batteries, and of course anxiety and panic quickly developed into agoraophobia, and I never went back, that was TEN YEARS AGO......omg just realised!
Im a florist from home now, and in a way, Im grateful I got ill, because working on that ward would have given me an ulcer, drinking problem/heart attack by now......flowers are so much nicer than enemas and bed pans, dont you think Col? :winks:
Yep hi, Paula , I absolultly love flowers. I'd love to do something from home, Ive been pondering over this option for a while. Your an inspiration.
Collette x
---------- Post added at 22:31 ---------- Previous post was at 22:29 ----------
Like Annie, I haven't done paid work since June. I left because of my employer's response to my mental health crisis. I've done some volunteering since, but I enjoy having the time to myself to pursue other things and as my husband is working full-time I haven't been pressured to find a job to support us as I was before whilst he (and I) was at University. I have an interview next week for a bursary award, to go towards the costs of setting up my own business :)
Wow I envy you, fantastic news I remember one of your recent threads about this, well done you. Just shows not all is lost, thanks Elle, it's making me think something will come right x
---------- Post added at 22:35 ---------- Previous post was at 22:31 ----------
I have been off since June now and would like to think I had a lot less stressful job to go back to.
Annie as always I do feel for you, I know last year you've had some tough times, the plus side now I think for you, it's nearing the end of this work issue for you because one way or another it will come to a head. Hang in there your areal great person and contributor to others in need on here X
Thank you Col. i was just saying to my husband that I think I will go in to see my boss. Discuss my phased return and give it a try, if it works, good...if it doesn't I will leave and we will just have to manage somehow. When I look back to before I married my ex...how much confidence I had. I went to America on my own, could drive anywhere, really enjoyed my life and now look at me!
I just went back after 2 months off, probably my longest absence for 20 years.
Now I'm waiting for the warning as my employers love to kick you when you're down, or in this case when you're trying to pick yourself back up :sad:
I'm with you Annie, honestly I sit and rock and sob sometimes, in utter disbelief at what's happend to me and my life. This breakdown I had though, has been a long time comming when I look at how much I've done and the stress I've constantly had to handle! But I never knew panic/ anxiety could strip you of everything in your life, it's soo scary.
I think that's a good idea, you going back to see what it's like because that is the only way you will know for sure. That way whatever the outcome you can get some closure & move on:hugs:
---------- Post added at 22:52 ---------- Previous post was at 22:47 ----------
I just went back after 2 months off, probably my longest absence for 20 years.
Now I'm waiting for the warning as my employers love to kick you when you're down, or in this case when you're trying to pick yourself back up :sad:
That's so true and the irony of you trying to get better and you getting pulled down, it's like role reversal. Your ill, they aren't happy, your trying to get better, there making you ill but youd think they would be , happy! Twisted world.
Good luck mark X
Good luck mark X
Thanks Col :)
Like Annie, I haven't done paid work since June. I left because of my employer's response to my mental health crisis. I've done some volunteering since, but I enjoy having the time to myself to pursue other things and as my husband is working full-time I haven't been pressured to find a job to support us as I was before whilst he (and I) was at University. I have an interview next week for a bursary award, to go towards the costs of setting up my own business :)
Wow Elle Kay you are in a very privileged position. It must take so much pressure off you to not have to find work. I envy your position.
I have not worked for a year (I was a social worker for 13 years). I live alone and have had to sell everything I own to pay my mortgage.
It was around Feb 2012 I took time off work at my last job, after a while off health were in touch, It came to a point where I couldn't afford to be off work no longer on SSP so forced myself back, in fairness I wasn't ready, 1 thing lead to another and I was fired (I could of taken them for unfair dismissal etc but couldn't handle the stress)
Around June I took a new job with my previous employer before the one above, I thought I could managE as I was going in part time, my anxiety pain attacks never left I just thought I'd crack on but it didnt take long before I was giving shifts away etc cos I couldn't face going to work! Cut along story short I'm back on sick, have been since around October November but I'm only getting ESA, what I find most annoying is I've heard nothing from work, my partner who is very supportive takes my sick notes in but I haven't had 1 phone call or text from my employer which I find very strange & disheartening, not sure what I can do but tbh I don't fancy going back there at all now.
Wow Elle Kay you are in a very privileged position. It must take so much pressure off you to not have to find work. I envy your position.
I have not worked for a year (I was a social worker for 13 years). I live alone and have had to sell everything I own to pay my mortgage.
Don't misunderstand me - I'm not some kind of spoilt thing, and we've had our downs certainly. I was made redundant while hubby was at college doing an access to university course, so we had no income for long enough, then we only had my wages from a part-time job (just 8 hours a week to begin with) during the three years hubby was at University. It's only in these last few months that things have started to change, with hubby getting a full-time graduate job, but by then it was almost "too late" and I'd fallen into my crisis period (probably from the stress of the previous 4 years). I'm sorry that your circumstances have taken a turn for the worst.
maximus1975
16-01-13, 10:05
i havnt worked properly since may i suppose , ive dabled in a couple of door knocking jobs but it was comission only and stressed me out to much, i was starting to get my confidence just before xmas then all the family came down from up country and i couldnt handle the family outings over the festive period without having a drink in secret every day for about 3 weeks i was averaging about 4 to five cans a day . the damage has been done im on my 3rd day without a drink and am suffering real bad anxiety
It was around Feb 2012 I took time off work at my last job, after a while off health were in touch, It came to a point where I couldn't afford to be off work no longer on SSP so forced myself back, in fairness I wasn't ready, 1 thing lead to another and I was fired (I could of taken them for unfair dismissal etc but couldn't handle the stress)
Around June I took a new job with my previous employer before the one above, I thought I could managE as I was going in part time, my anxiety pain attacks never left I just thought I'd crack on but it didnt take long before I was giving shifts away etc cos I couldn't face going to work! Cut along story short I'm back on sick, have been since around October November but I'm only getting ESA, what I find most annoying is I've heard nothing from work, my partner who is very supportive takes my sick notes in but I haven't had 1 phone call or text from my employer which I find very strange & disheartening, not sure what I can do but tbh I don't fancy going back there at all now.
ahh Cameron youve had a rough time 2012. there must be something about febuary because 2011 feb 7th thats when it ALL came crashing down for me. its a shame i remember the pinacle point being the 7th because 2 days later its my daughters birthday SO, i never will forget the 7th, now. take your time, sod work communicating with you and just put your energies into you and getting yourself right. x
---------- Post added at 11:10 ---------- Previous post was at 11:06 ----------
i havnt worked properly since may i suppose , ive dabled in a couple of door knocking jobs but it was comission only and stressed me out to much, i was starting to get my confidence just before xmas then all the family came down from up country and i couldnt handle the family outings over the festive period without having a drink in secret every day for about 3 weeks i was averaging about 4 to five cans a day . the damage has been done im on my 3rd day without a drink and am suffering real bad anxiety
Maximus i remember all the stress you went through at home and then all that deliberation over the sales job with solar energy. so have you left the sales job now then??? watch the drink Maximus, seriously anxiety is bad enough and the symtoms that go with it without, you getting dependant on alcohol. ive been tempted by this BUT seek help if u think this is or becomes out of control.:winks:
maximus1975
16-01-13, 15:25
yeh ive jacked that job in , then i hit the booze for 3 weeks i stoped on sunday im not going down that road again ,its left me with real bad anxiety im really ashamed of myself
paranoidtree
18-01-13, 18:19
I managed to last for 8 years in one job with only having a week off here and there when it got too bad, then 2 years in my next job which was even more stressful before finally having a breakdown last January. I was signed off for 3 weeks by the doctor and the employer promised to support me in my recovery from anxiety - oh my they really didn't. my manager made it all ten times worse! In the end I handed my notice in and left. I ws very lucky that my husband agreed that I could not work for a while (we could afford up to 6 months without me working).
Then I applied for and got a job as a school librarian, it is part time and 5 mins walk from my house. I ended up not working/unemployed for around 3 months. This was mainly due to when my new job started last November. I am happy in my new job, there is no stress (well apart from Year 4 are terrors!) but the job suits me more. The people I work with are nice and my manager is actually really supportive (something I have never had!)
I think the length of time a person needs varies so much and can depend on what experience they have had in employment. I didn't want to start my new job last November as I was so scared that it was going to be like where I worked before, thankfully I have been lucky.
Princess2206
19-01-13, 14:30
I am off since 4th of December. I hoped I will be ok after couple weeks after taking medication but I still don't feel good and ready. My work was the biggest trigger for my anxiety/ depression so my doctor told me that I can't go back till I feel much better. My work still paying me my normal salary but I worry they stop and I just can't afford it.:(
hi princess, yes thats a worry , work cutting down or off, your wage!
weve been destitute for nearly 2 years with 2 young kids and a new house with huge mortgage - the timming of my breakdown couldnt have been better! i had to quit my pgce - hurrendous BUT when your that bad, what are you suppose to do???
I have been off since 2nd July 2012. My job was not a trigger for my current state of mind, however there are people I work with who are not exactly helping my current state of mind either. I know some people will know this already but both my sister and dad died suddenly within 4 months of each other. I initially coped on auto pilot trying to support other family members when my sister died, she was 43 with 3 children and a loving husband. I began having panic attacks and plunged into depression 3 months later. My poor dad suffered so badly with losing his daughter and died of heart failure in July. There are a couple of people who I work with can't understand why I 'need' all this time off. I sometimes feel they think I am swinging it. Believe me I WANT to get back to work, I am on half pay now and cannot afford it. I have also been informed that if I don't make progress in my recovery I could lose my job. So nice to be kicked when you're down. The comments that have been made regarding my situation by these collegues is quite sickening and inhuman. Normally I have a lovely independant life with 2 beautiful children, nice house and happily single for now. At the moment I feel like a quivering empty shell who can barely function even though I am trying so hard. The question is would I rather be a hard faced, incompassionate person with no soul who can slag off someone in my position and make me feel uncomfortable when I try to contact friends at work or would I be suffering like I am now? I think I would rather suffer as I WILL recover in time and they will always remain hard faced, shallow people. I am sorry to keep posting about my losses but I am hurting and having a bad day today worrying that I will never get back to work and it helps to write it down.
I have been off since 2nd July 2012. My job was not a trigger for my current state of mind, however there are people I work with who are not exactly helping my current state of mind either. I know some people will know this already but both my sister and dad died suddenly within 4 months of each other. I initially coped on auto pilot trying to support other family members when my sister died, she was 43 with 3 children and a loving husband. I began having panic attacks and plunged into depression 3 months later. My poor dad suffered so badly with losing his daughter and died of heart failure in July. There are a couple of people who I work with can't understand why I 'need' all this time off. I sometimes feel they think I am swinging it. Believe me I WANT to get back to work, I am on half pay now and cannot afford it. I have also been informed that if I don't make progress in my recovery I could lose my job. So nice to be kicked when you're down. The comments that have been made regarding my situation by these collegues is quite sickening and inhuman. Normally I have a lovely independant life with 2 beautiful children, nice house and happily single for now. At the moment I feel like a quivering empty shell who can barely function even though I am trying so hard. The question is would I rather be a hard faced, incompassionate person with no soul who can slag off someone in my position and make me feel uncomfortable when I try to contact friends at work or would I be suffering like I am now? I think I would rather suffer as I WILL recover in time and they will always remain hard faced, shallow people. I am sorry to keep posting about my losses but I am hurting and having a bad day today worrying that I will never get back to work and it helps to write it down.
Hi Katy , im sooo sorry to hear about your loss. two of the most important people in anyones life really! im sooo sad for you! Those poor kids to have lost their mum.
all i can say is HOW DARE your work collegues behave like this and not understand your time off, hope nothing bad happens to them, thats all i can say because you never know how trauma will affect you! You dont know me but I was always as strong as an ox and larger than life and love to travel abroad. NOW after my breakdown 2 years ago, im a shell of my former self, i know thats a bit of a cliche but TRUE. I dearnt go to he other side of my city. so let those idiots think what they want. What right has any one to behave like this as grief effects people in different ways and with you its not only upset you tramendously , it has now made you ill and your panic although its a product of your grief is also a matter all on its own. Its not like a cold that will go in a week, it has a mind off its own you can not just get yourself back to normal , it can take weeks, months and years. As for loosing your job because of your conditiion , its not that easy in the UK for them to sake you because of health, seek advice MIND and CAB.
:hugs:
Thanks Col for your kind words. 2012 completely knocked me for six and I am usually a strong person. You are right, everyone deals with grief differently and I have never had to deal with it before. When I see how well my sisters husband and 3 girls are coping, I almost feel ashamed to be in such a state as they are doing so well. I know it is the years ahead that may be difficult and I want to be there, be strong for them as I love them like they were my own. They were a beautiful, happy family and it is so cruel.
As for work, you wouldn't believe some of the comments that have got back to me and the pettyness. The thing is I want to go back ASAP, however the thought of going back to an office containing these people fills me with dread. I feel like putting in a grievance but I'm not strong enough. xxx
6 years, I hated work and had my boss cut my hours from 40 to 20, didnt really help so he was nice enough to give me a job in the wharehouse (COMET).
Then I had him cut my hours to just 10 a week, one day I stayed in bed and that was that.
I didn't realise at the time that it was because of anxiety, strange I know.
Katy I know what your saying but, I would defiantly put in a greivance XX
Fenrir, sounds like a rare nice boss that you had. Hope your better now.
1 month today on Fluoxetine, feeling alot better and hoping to hear about CBT next month when I go back to the GPs.
Thanks.
I'm wondering what people in the US do for this ... I know we have FMLA but that only allows 12 weeks off without being fired, but no pay ... If we are lucky our employer offers disability (short or long term) insurance, but sometimes mental health isn't covered or doesn't count. I personally don't have it because I am a part-time worker so don't qualify for their benefits anyway. It is extremely hard to get on the government version of disability.
I guess what I am trying to say is I wish I could be off of work, it would really help me take time to take care of myself and focus but cannot afford to miss pay. Any americans know of other options besides what I mentioned?
wendy35107
23-01-13, 23:09
I've been off a totally of 13 days in the last rolling year.
I'm on my final written warning with my employer! They just find ways to kick me even harder when I'm down.
I've had about 4 occasions when I've been off, the longest for 4 days and I get disciplined. It's pretty hard to take actually when it's out of your control.
I've been off a totally of 13 days in the last rolling year.
I'm on my final written warning with my employer! They just find ways to kick me even harder when I'm down.
I've had about 4 occasions when I've been off, the longest for 4 days and I get disciplined. It's pretty hard to take actually when it's out of your control.
Only 13 days and you have a written warning? That isn't good :(
Hi Wendy that is harsh, I know most companies go with the 3 bouts of sickness rule, although its only 13 days it's 4 different occasions, I know it's out of your control but all sickness is.
I'm not defending your company btw as I'm in the same position as us all here, just shedding some light on the way these companies work.
Hopefully with the new ad campaigns regarding mental health, there will be more support for people in our situation from friends, family, bosses, colleagues etc
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