lorac
16-01-13, 17:51
Hi
Its been a while since I visited this site but this week I came back because I haven't had a very good couple of weeks with my anxiety and let myself get sucked in again thinking that life had taken a turn for the worse and that I was the person I was two years ago. When I first came to this site I was suffering badly with anxiety and panic disorder and just walking into my garden was a problem I really didn't have a life I had to rely on others and couldn't face the world because of the state I was in, with much determination and help from a brilliant friend I started to tackle myself and face my fears, which really just boiled down to being afraid of the state I was in, that's what caused my problem. I discovered I wasn't really afraid of the world outside I was scared to show myself to the world because of the state I was in, I would shake, get dizzy, feel the need to run, thought I was going to faint and much more. Little by little I stepped back into the outside world, sometimes feeling better, sometimes feeling that I failed but each day I would attempt something no matter how small until I built up my confidence until I was able to function in the big wide world again I may not be able to go out alone but I have come to terms with that because I can go out and eat and pubs and shopping has become possible again in fact there isn't very much I cant do now. I have a life and one I enjoy, it may not be the same as the life I had before anxiety kicked in but its my life and i'm living again, and one I enjoy. To people who don't know me I probably appear the life and sole of the party to those who know me I'm (I@m) me again enjoying life.
I think the reason I wanted to post this is to let myself and you know that just because we have anxiety disorders it doesn't mean we cannot live our lives, I still have it, but I don't care so much because despite having a bad time right now I'm still looking forward to going out on Friday evening and I have learnt that despite how I feel before I go I will forget when I get there and have my couple of glasses of wine, and I will be up dancing with the rest of them because I am just another person in the world who is entitled to my life and I have learnt that when I look at others and think they are so much better off than me I may be wrong because I have learnt to appreciate life a lot more than the people who take it all for granted.
What I really want to tell you people is don't be discouraged by the feelings that you have because they really are not that important and they don't hurt you they just weight you down and acceptance of yourself really does go a long way, we are all so different and if I had found the courage a couple of years ago to face myself instead of hiding I would not have missed out on so much life.
I wish you all the best because you are really good people and deserve good things xxx
Sorry if this doesn't make sense to you but to me it does and I know even sitting here with my anxiety back on the scene again I am better and a far stronger woman than I have ever been.
Its been a while since I visited this site but this week I came back because I haven't had a very good couple of weeks with my anxiety and let myself get sucked in again thinking that life had taken a turn for the worse and that I was the person I was two years ago. When I first came to this site I was suffering badly with anxiety and panic disorder and just walking into my garden was a problem I really didn't have a life I had to rely on others and couldn't face the world because of the state I was in, with much determination and help from a brilliant friend I started to tackle myself and face my fears, which really just boiled down to being afraid of the state I was in, that's what caused my problem. I discovered I wasn't really afraid of the world outside I was scared to show myself to the world because of the state I was in, I would shake, get dizzy, feel the need to run, thought I was going to faint and much more. Little by little I stepped back into the outside world, sometimes feeling better, sometimes feeling that I failed but each day I would attempt something no matter how small until I built up my confidence until I was able to function in the big wide world again I may not be able to go out alone but I have come to terms with that because I can go out and eat and pubs and shopping has become possible again in fact there isn't very much I cant do now. I have a life and one I enjoy, it may not be the same as the life I had before anxiety kicked in but its my life and i'm living again, and one I enjoy. To people who don't know me I probably appear the life and sole of the party to those who know me I'm (I@m) me again enjoying life.
I think the reason I wanted to post this is to let myself and you know that just because we have anxiety disorders it doesn't mean we cannot live our lives, I still have it, but I don't care so much because despite having a bad time right now I'm still looking forward to going out on Friday evening and I have learnt that despite how I feel before I go I will forget when I get there and have my couple of glasses of wine, and I will be up dancing with the rest of them because I am just another person in the world who is entitled to my life and I have learnt that when I look at others and think they are so much better off than me I may be wrong because I have learnt to appreciate life a lot more than the people who take it all for granted.
What I really want to tell you people is don't be discouraged by the feelings that you have because they really are not that important and they don't hurt you they just weight you down and acceptance of yourself really does go a long way, we are all so different and if I had found the courage a couple of years ago to face myself instead of hiding I would not have missed out on so much life.
I wish you all the best because you are really good people and deserve good things xxx
Sorry if this doesn't make sense to you but to me it does and I know even sitting here with my anxiety back on the scene again I am better and a far stronger woman than I have ever been.