Help! Please read!

[HM2012]

Hi everyone! Been a while but having another bad spell :(
I had a good Christmas, my last panic attack was about a week
before Christmas! Until yesterday morning.
I've been applying for new jobs & this week I had my first interview.
The first part on Wednesday I went in feeling confident, I was so shocked
at myself because I didn't think i'd be able to do it! I passed & got called
back for the second & final part which was yesterday morning.
I was nervous about this because I knew it was the final one.
I tried not to let nerves get the better of me but once I arrived in the
car park I freaked out! I had a full blown panic attack! I couldn't breathe,
felt as if I was about to faint/die, I was so shaken up because it couldn't
have happened at a worse time! I sat in my car for 20 mins to try & calm
myself down, & I did, to a certain degree! I got out my car and said '**** this,
it's now or never' and went inside to do the second part of my interview.
They could tell I wasn't myself & I just wanted to get it over & done with!
I battled through & answered everything they asked whilst feeling DR/DP.
IT WAS HELL. I honestly thought there's no way on earth i'll get this job!
Left, went back home, went straight to bed because I felt terrible!
Two hours later I was woken up with a phone call telling me i'd got the job!
I didn't know how to feel, a part of me was over the moon, & the other part,
I kept thinking 'I feel awful, I can't do this'
Since yesterday happened i've been having mini bursts of panic attacks,
feeling lost touch with reality etc. I feel like i'm not here now whilst
typing this! It's really ****ing scary :( I don't start my job until the 28th.
I'm scared i'm going to get panic attacks when I start my job & I don't want
to blow it or ruin anything because it's the best opportunity i've ever had!
Can someone, anyone, please give me some tips/help me? :( xx

[spottitchsam]

hm2012.congratulations on getting the job.but you should really be proud of yourself getting there in the 1st place.you done well under the circumstances.all the best for the 28th.you will be fine just hang on in there.sending you some hugs hugs hugs.

[HM2012]

Thank you! This made me smile!
I need as much support/help/tips as I can get!
Please, please, leave some comments everyone :( xx

[Kayleigh100]

I once employed someone who I had met twice before and they flunked the interview (not saying you did by the way!) and that was because I knew they were the best person for the job. And they have been. 15 years later, we are still working together.

I also work with someone who is bipolar and wouldn't change her for the world.

So, congratulate yourself - forget yesterday's panic. You were the best!!! Yippee. Try now to look forward to the 28th. Is there anything you need to do to prepare?

[Lissa101]

Well done! You should be proud of yourself for not letting it get the better of you! I can relate because I've just started a phd after 6 months off and have also been having panic attacks and having to deal with dp/dr when I get worried and stressed (usually talking and meeting new colleagues sets it off). I find it best just to take it hour by hour, day by day and eventually you'll get in to your new routine and start enjoying it. Best of luck with your new job :hugs:

[HM2012]

Thank you for all your kind comments so far!
I managed to hold it together throughout the interview,
it was a different story when I got back in the car!
I'm just terrified of starting next Monday with a panic attack &
it ruining everything! I don't have a clue how to stop that from
happening! I don't have to prepare anything, I have two weeks
paid training starting on the 28th. I'm bricking it :(
I want to feel proud, happy, etc but this panic has overcome
me since the beginning of yesterday! Please keep giving me
as many tips/advice/help as you can! I appreciate it all!

[Kayleigh100]

When I get panics like that it does take me a few days to calm down. In those days I take each hour as it comes.

[Pinktel]

I would look at the cbt4panic you have time to start reading it and it's free for 30 days

[HM2012]

Thanks, anyone else have any advice?
I'm really struggling :(

[Pinktel]

The more I continue with the cbt4panic the better I get and I have had anxiety for 20 years.

It is a very inciteful course and I love the way he has made it free for 30 days plus you then get another 30 days for your money back once you have been charged. If you decide it is not for you I don't even think he expects the material back as you down load it. It is a genuine course which is not something you can say very often these days! I tried the linden method (it was more expensive than this course) it didn't work. I have seen 2 psychologists. They have helped slightly.

This is by far the best option I have tried. Cbt is THE gold standard treatment for panic and anxiety. Meds can help of course (I have never been brave enough for them) but they are a support, however they can't alter your thinking or beliefs, only cognitive work can do that. If you think about it, anxiety etc is something we are doing to ourselves through our own thoughts, how else do you expect to treat it successfully than through extra/different thinking? It's the only truly logical form of attack in my mind.

It's not a quick fix in many cases, but by god I feel better than I have done in months and I love the way I can work at my own pace, I finally feel more in control and confident.

[jency]

i was sent on an anxiety course which helped me a lot. it taught me how to manage an attack and how to keep my anxiety low.