"The nomorepanic maneaters"

[Granny Primark]

Hi everyone,
Once again the X Factor is back on our tv screens.
For the last 2 weeks i have watched it and have thought to myself that there are members of this site who have got brill voices and could do a lot better than some of the ones that have auditioned for this years series.
I know for a fact that ju is a great singer and also that wobbily lin sings like a lark. (pilark)
I am sure that by the time next year comes we could put together a group who would do really well.
Im not a great singer myself but im sure i could organise the choreography.
Manmoor and nicjay i really hope you consider auditoning. Im sure you do well with the rest of the maneaters.
If theres anyone else interested in being a member of this group please get in touch with me.
Il be your manager and will only take a 50% of your earnings if you become successful.
Looking forward to hearing from you.

Take care
LYNN

[wobily_lin]

hey lynn

Oi, ye won't get a penny outta me woman. I've worked hard to get my voice to where it is now. It's not easy being a pilark ye know. Takes a lot of hard work. So sod off.
And lynn I know you sing like a crow so ur in girl, ye can't escape. You have to b the lead singer...
Mandy moo can do backing vocals cos she used to lookin over my shoulder.. and Lindalou on guitar cos she is a hard biatch
O wot can we sing?????...hummmmm....'so matcho he's gota b so matcho', or 'I'm forever blowing bubbles'.....'sex on the beach'.... god the list is endless. I can't wait to get me teeth into Simon Cowell, me an Sharon will get pissed with Ozzy, and as for Louis oh just come ere an gimme a big cuddle.
Comeon you lot. We the maneaters....................
And watch out for that lynn one she wants all your money ................

Take care,

Lin.
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[clickaway]

Hey, I'll just be Mr Nasty and bag all the loot :D

Ray


http://www.anxietyrelease.org.uk/

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.
~Mark Sanders and Tia Sillers

[lildutt]

omg you nutters can i be one of the maneater lol
i was feeling lil down until i read this post
i knew loopylynn (mom2) would of cheer me up
and she has
lol thanks mom2
bellxx

[nicjay]

Lynn

I'm not a maneater well not in public anyways! I love all men but that would not be reciprocated if i was to try to sing. The men would run a mile if i were to attempt to sing-i definitely do not have the voice of an angel or the manners come that! I consider myself the silent type maybe i could just shimmy in the background whilst you audition.

By every other definition of maneater i still am one except i don't sing!

Nicola :D
xxx

[Granny Primark]

Im disappointed with how many want to audition so far.
Come on we really need get this group sorted and on the road.
Ive sorted out a couple of gigs so far so that should give you some encouragment to audition.

The first one is close by me and is in a gay bar.
The 2nd one is in the red light area of stoke on trent.

Im up for doing a solo if need be. Il sing "Over the hill and far away" or i might even sing "Climb every mountain" thats if someone will buy me a good pair of hiking boots.

If some of you cant sing how about humming?
Just dont take a shower for a month then youl do fine.

Look forward to some more volunteers

LYNN

[manmoor]

Hi Lynn,

I am deeply deeply upset that you think of me as a maneater. You have really upset me saying this. Just cos I love men dont mean I eat them. I could think of more better things to do with them. Lmfao Lynn yer an eejet hope I fooled you there haha. Im up for the job with Lin as me back-up cos shes always 2nd best anyway lmao.

Take Care

Mandyxx

[Ross]

lmao @ Lynn.

To be quite frankly honest, I dont think it would work. Lin and Mandy would definately eat Simon Cowell, poor old Louis Walsh would probably die of a heart attack and the gracious Ms Osbourne would definately be jealous of the other 'nutter' women in the Audition Room.

I somewhat feel I shouldnt have posted this, as Mandy will probably come and break me windys now, but hey ho, I have insurance.

If you dont take my advice and indeed continue with your efforts, I do know of a good voice coach, and have spoken to him regarding your proposed efforts. He would be happy to work with you all, provided he is allowed to sit behind 3inch bullet proof glass.

I wish you luck!

Ross xxx


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Is There Really Gravity, Or Does Earth Just Suck?

[Granny Primark]

Thanks for your post ross.
I really do think we may need a help with the voice coaching.
Another thing that we need is someone who can design the costumes. If i have to be in the group then i will really need that boob job i so need.
Also does anyone know of a good plasterer?
I think plaster might be better than foundation cream for a few of them that hope to be in the maneaters.
Also great news! Ive found another venue for the maneaters to sing at.
The home for the chronically deaf.

Thanks for all your good luck messages.
But really we dont need them if im the manager.

Take care
LYNN

[manmoor]

Ross hope you find someone soon to replace your windys before the rain comes lol. Lynn I could design the costumes as I've a good eye me for detail but they may be scant I can tell ye so I wont need much material so hopefully that'll keep the costs down a bit. The foundation well now please please dont let me do without me makeup cos without it I'm dog rough and thats on a good day. I do have a voice like an angel tho and thats a plus. Let me know when rehearsals start as I'm dying to get it on.

Take Care

Mandyxx

[t0rt01se36]

Thanx Lynn. Its me Lynn was on about (Ju.)

I'm up for auditioning but first if any1 wants 2 hear me on messenger, U KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What about a few gigs, entertaining old people some where?

I AM NOT A MAN EATER

The group should be called Panic ye Not. Just an idea.

[Granny Primark]

Ju.ann i did mean you.
I think your idea for a groups name is brill.

[manmoor]

This is to be sang to the tune of twinkle twinkle little star::::

We are maneaters Lin and me
Look at us and you will see
That we're just 2 nutty girls
Wanting men 2 dance and swirl
Wont you play along with we
no more panics where we'll be.
Linda_lou is on the drum
Lynn is sucking on her thumb
Ross is singing loud and clear
We are wishing we were near
Join our band and you will see
That we're mad as mad can be.



Take Care

Mandyxx

[stace81]

Lynn you know im in hunny!!!
No hot pants though sorry!!
xxxxxx

sford

[Ammeg]

A bunch of nutters the lot of u!! hey mayb thats a good name 4 y'all!!!
In which case count me in!!! lol
I fit in well with the lot of u!!!
But i will leave the man eatin to the rest of u as im a lady!!! lol
Gemxxxx

[scoobygirl2005]

Heres some lyrics from me lol. Loved your lyrics Mandy there were brill!

In the tune of "I will survive." Gloria Gaynor.

Verse 1:

Once there were these people from a panic site
They couldn't win the x factor but they thought they might,
They used to sing songs and give each other a fright,
But then Mandy drove them mad and they got in a fight!

Chorus:

Oh no now go, go get your rescue spray!
And then you all will be okay.
With Lynn and Stace to help you through the day!
You will be okay!
Okayyyyy dooo doo do do doo dooo.....!

Scooby2005
x x

[manmoor]

Lmao Lucy oh aye trust me to be the one to drive them all mad lmao. Well done love lol.

Take Care

Mandyxx

[Granny Primark]

Well what can i say?
I am totally gobsmacked for once in my life!!!!
Mandy and Lucy what a brilliant talent you have for song writing.
Ammeg im really pleased you want you join, im sure you will be a major asset to the maneaters.
Ju ann I really think you would do well singing the ballards cus ive heard your lovely sweet voice.
Mandy im sure could find a suitable irish song for ju to sing.

Im really pleased now with response i am getting.
Lin have you got anymore ideas for the "Nomorepanic maneaters"? I know that you will like the idea of the skimpy outfits ya tart. lol
Looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Take care you bunch of maneaters/nutters
LYNN xx

[manmoor]

Also to be sang to twinkle twinkle little star (very original)

Lin my mate I love you so
Laura you make my heart glow
Linda special that you are
Shay your always in a bar
Dee and Ruth you like to gab
Lynn and Lucy your both fab
Tina you are such a hun
Not forgetting Daisybun
Your all mad as mad can be
Wish you all were wise like me.

And Ju please contact me so I can arrange a suitable Irish song just for you. xxxx


Take Care

Mandyxx

[t0rt01se36]

Runaway by The Corrs?

[scoobygirl2005]

Lmao Mandy great lyrics lol. :D

Scooby2005
x x

[Granny Primark]

Mandy what fantastic lyrics!!!
Dont know whod be brave enough to sing them to twinkle twinkle little star tho.
Ju i love "runaway" by the corrs.
I bet you sing that brill.
This idea of mine is really taking shape now. Im pleased about the response.
I may even take a cut in my fees now. lol

look forward to some more response.

Take care
LYNN xx

[manmoor]

Oh Lynn what wonderful news. I think all the proceeds should go to charity. You dont need a cut cos the laugh you have will make up for it. Would there be any chance of some liquid refreshments before we start?. I seem to sing better with liquid inside me. It's getting really exciting now and I cant wait till rehersals start. Lin says she'll put me up for a few nights and Ross has also volunteered but dunno how that would work at Ross's cos he aint got stone proof glass. Let me know dates so I can get flights sorted oh the excitement.

Take Care

Mandyxx

[Granny Primark]

Hi mandy,

There certainly will be some liquid refreshment.
I went to morrisons yesterday and the Robinsons orange squash was buy one get on free so bout 10 bottles.
Ive heard that you get very excited just make certain you are wearing a tena lady.
As reagards Lin well she is an angel for offering to put you up.
But Ross?
My god he must be desperate for some female company!!!! lol

Il keep you all informed, but if anyone else has got any more ideas about the type of music the maneaters can sing id really appreciate it.

Take care
LYNNxx

[mad_shell66]

haha you load of nutters!
shell xx

[Southern_Belle]

Hi Mandy,

Wow surely I did not know you had such talent! Loved the song!

Lynn, What a great idea! Of course I have to join as there can't be just one yank here (Lindalou)!

I suggest we dress up and sing like in the big band eras 1940's or the 1960's because that was when women singers were huge hits and you could at least understand what they were singing. Just a thought!

By the way I will lipsinc as I can't sing a note and will bring the whole group down but I am very good at it!!!

Bel

"Our thoughts are our reality"

[Ross]

Edited Because Im An Idiot!


*Repeat Post Removed*

[Ross]

*sulks*

MANDY: You have broke me Windy's enough, I would have thought you are bored of doing that now! Plus, theres only so many times I can replace them. I might buy some chipboard and cover them up while your down.

LYNN: I am not desperate for female company whatsoever, however, if there are any females out there, feel free to PM me [:P]


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Is There Really Gravity, Or Does Earth Just Suck?

[Granny Primark]

Bel,
Thats great news about you being in the maneaters.
Il see if you can stop with wobily.
Ross im rallying round now to find you some females to to pm you.
Ive got a bitch here, shes called sally, but she cant write cus shes a dog. But shes very obedient and loves to lick people.

Take care
LYNN xx

[Ross]

Lynn


<b id="quote">quote:</b id="quote"><table border="0" id="quote"><tr id="quote"><td class="quote" id="quote">But shes very obedient and loves to lick people.</td id="quote"></tr id="quote"></table id="quote">

Thats no good for me. Obedience is overated in my opinion!


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Is There Really Gravity, Or Does Earth Just Suck?

[Granny Primark]

Ross,

You little buggar!!!
And to think i thought you were quiet and shy.
Im just wondering if mandy has brought the worst out in you.
Ju i hope your still up for our group. At least i know you can sing if the others cant.
I think lin would be a a great scrapper, soz i meant rapper.

Look forward to any more suggestions.

Take care
LYNN xx

[t0rt01se36]

I've had a brainwave!!!!!!!!!!!

The song (whatever the title) by Panic Ye Not should b released 4 Valentines Day, for Charity.

What about The Variety Club?

[Daisybun]

Well I found my next venture lol. I can get my hands on some recording equipment guys, I helped produce the last CD I did so this should be great - loved the twinkle twinkle lyrics mandy. Yep we may be nutters but wow we couldn't be worse than some of those on X factor!

Take care
Daisybun

'This too will pass'

[wobily_lin]

Lmfao Daisy, ye not heard us yet. Get the earplugs ready cos once ye hear me and mandy(even with a few bevvies), you be maimed for life i tell ye. Stone the crow comes to mind lol. But hey for charity i'll do anything, yes ross anything.... mandy moo, i cleared the cellar for when ye come and i have huge padlocks ready so i can lock ye up during the daytime.. ye know how ye hate the sun mandy moo... does things to ye, poor moo.....just let me know when ye be here ok so i can warn me neighbours cos i dont want them to b shocked when they see ye hun ye know... no offense but i gotta keep up with the jones innit.

I heard thru the grapevine that that laura one is a dark horse and she can shake a tamborine like theres no tomorrow.... ye see she shakes her ass the same so we be ok there i think...Ross will have to be tea boy sorry but ye just not good enuf mate.. I think we need a choir wot do ye think eh???? at least that was ye wont be able to tell who's in tune and who aint..... i will b on the drums. I do some head banging every day so using the drums instead of the wall wont make that much dif eh...Think we really need to come up with a song tho soon cos we gotta start practicin ye know.... O and that linda one she is good on guitar cos she loves all that leather and biker ****....tell ye the things ye find out bout ppl here, shocks me i tell ye....

I think we need some male talent in here too.... Zinn?? Cammy?? Dom?? Shay??? Bozz???? come on the lads...... or are ye thinking of makin your own group eh.... god wot would ye call it... hummmm now theres a thought... the mind certainly boggles...'the monsters', eh lol.

come on girls 'lets get physical, physical ,i wanna get physical, lets get into physical, let me hear ur body talk, ur body, talk let me hear ur body taaalk'.......lol

Take care,

Lin.
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[lildutt]

oii oii what about me have you forgotten me im a talented pole dancer lol

[Granny Primark]

Well this is the enthusiasm ive been wanting from you lot.
I just want some marracas i can shake.
Perhaps i could get a couple of coconuts.
lilbel im sorry sug i forgot about you,
I had heard about you and how good you were at pole dancing.
I really like the idea of getting physical lin.
I appreciate your ideas lin but just remember that im the manager and what i say goes. But it is a great idea of yours to include some males, but then we couldnt call ourselves the maneaters.

Seriously now tho, joking aside we will have to have some kind of meet up where we can decide whose in or out of the group.
Ive heard ju ann sing so i think it goes without saying that shes in.
As regards the rest of you well we have to sort out auditions.

Take care
LYNN xx

[chelsea]

given it lots of thought and id like to audition, but im not that great. but after hearing lin and mandy sing i realise that i could be what your looking for lol. if im not succesfull im prepared to serve drinks or maybe do makeup. i have boxes full that you can use as im fully aware that some will need more than others. so lynn i look forward to hearing from you soon. great idea lynnxx oh yes i also like the song Doing the lambeth walk Oi. or my old mans a dustman.


d purdham

[lildutt]

http://www.flowgo.com/index.cfm?action=view&id=12983&scid=9964
this is what i want to sing

[manmoor]

Bel lmfao god aint she got it all eh. So funny and just what I needed xx

Take Care

Mandyxx

[wobily_lin]

eh bell stop showing off your body woman... ye know it only makes me jealous... its ur boobies.. i so jealous of how ye can whip them ova ye shoulder and swing them about..... ur def the pole dancer for us babe ye got the part.........cass me julie, you hav to come up with some good songs for us to sing... come on now ye know ur gifted in that department anyways.... hum bell i think cass could def give ye a run for ur money with that pole dancing... she got big mamas lol... or me julie wot bout cleaning the mens dressing room eh ....... hummm back stage passes hummmmmm now theres a thought.... we are the maneaters and we live up to our name innit girls...

Oh I'm glad to announce ladies that we hav signed our first male of the group, can ye guesss............nope its not ross sorry......... it's our Dom. Oh he can't wait to get in there ladies so egg him on please he a lickle shy............

Take care,

Lin.
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[t0rt01se36]

Are we doing a cd then and not a performance unless asked?

I'll leave it upto some one else to choose a song.

[Ammeg]

hehehehehe- ur all nutters!!!
But it would be a honour to join in the craziness!!
Lets talk outfits ladies!!! I was thinkin pink leather dresses... knee high pink boots.... wot u think??? lol

[lildutt]

sounds kinky
lol special with mine and cass boobs

[wobily_lin]

Oh Gemma, I'm more a leather an hotpants babe. What do ye think eh??????? Oh I can see us now. LMFAO..........

Oh, and girls I have another announcement to make..... yes another male has joined our ranks. Can ye guess who???? Yes it's our one and only honourary girly himself, Shay.... yes believe it or not it's the truth. Gemma he fancies doing a bita fancy dress too so you two can kit us out.. god help us...........make up too.......... and god ye gonna need loadsa that for lynn, linda, laura and Dee, god get the trowel out and Dee the stillettoes..yipppeeee. Oh and lynn needs a good uplift poor lass. Was thinking some a those chicken fillet things........or some tennis balls b beta eh lmfao.............. come on girls lets play dressup.

Take care,

Lin.
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[Lindalou64]

Lin you my irish nutter and i have to say you get nuttier by the day but i love ya lol well u wont let me do the drums cant sings for chit so why dont i be the cleaner ....im good at that lol...........maybe found me a good man in the bathroom eh? now that would be worth cleaning a toilet.......lol......................Linda lou lunatic [8D]

[Granny Primark]

You cheeky buggar lin!!!! lol
ive got the chicken fillets theyre in the fridge but were having those for tea.
Tennis balls? My god i need something bigger than that.
Has anyone got any footballs?
I like the idea of the black hot pants lin, ive often heard people say "nice legs shame about her boobies"
Lindalou you scrubber!!!
Looking for a man in the loo?
You should be ashamed of yerself lol
Glad your coming in on this ammeg ask your sister for some advice on how to turn crap singers in to fantastic ones.
Im not surprised at all about shay id heard he liked dressing up,suspenders, high heels and red satin knickers and bra.

[Ammeg]

lol!!!
It will take more than me sister to turn us into singers lynn!!!
i agree about shay- bet he heard about the pink leather idea didnt he!!
Now we will have 2 put u all in high shoes.. so u can compete with me lushous legs!! lol

[t0rt01se36]

I'm worried now, cos my legs aren't designed 4 hot pants and the only leather I'd wear is shoes or jacket.

[Daisybun]

Oh leather a bit hot there! Well when are we auditioning Lynn? Weather Girls eat your hearts out, the new Spice Girls are about to explode onto the scene!!!! Now we need an image - maneaters eh. I think I may have an idea for the guys, anyone see the Weather Girls vid Raining men - blokes in hot pants and raincoats - that would be a sight for sore eyes lol
Ross, Shay, Cam, Zinn - you up for a bit of a boogie, sure that we can teach you the rudiments of pole dancing lol

Take care
Daisybun

'This too will pass'

[redbaron]

The mind boggles, truly it does!

“There is a certain sort of man who ignores his own good qualities but is tormented by his bad ones, this is the man who writes about himself.”
-W. Somerset Maugham

[Southern_Belle]

Okay, somebody needs to get Dee for some really really strong pancake makeup for the guys if they are going to be in the group. (foundation) I will not perform with them unless they have full make-up on with wigs and high heels on.

Lin how did you know I shake my butt so when I walk???

I suppose someone has to the a diva in the group!!!

By the way, if anybody gets bored with your singing, I can still do some ballet, my tutu is somewhere around here....

Bel

"Our thoughts are our reality"

[Ross]

Daisy, I appreciate your enthusiasm in inviting me and the other guys to wear HotPants and 'boogie', but I am afraid I shall have to give that one a miss. See, a few months ago, I was in the local club, wearing me HotPants and having a 'boogie'.... anyways, you wouldnt believe it, but a few drinks later, these Biker Chicks came over and beat me up for looking a little bit of a ponce. Since them, I have developed a new phobia of HotPants, and Biker Chicks.

In terms of all this talk of boobies, and legs and leather..... I think I need the toilet. [:I]


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Is There Really Gravity, Or Does Earth Just Suck?

[Granny Primark]

Ross ive had a brill idea for you.
I want you to sing solo. (so low we cant bloody hear you)

Hey Belle weve got our diva, its ju ann.
Ive heard some great news today shes getting a keyboard.
After seeing some of the crap tonight on x factor weve certainly got a chance.
Ive made enquiries about getting a boob job but its far to expensive i will just have to make do with my jelly bras and toilet paper, not unless any of you lot can organise a whip round to pay for my boob job.

[Daisybun]

Ross, well what can I say :(. Nevermind, your trauma is noted, maybe you can do some backing vocals in a gold lamee number, something in the line of earth, Wind and Fire from the seventies disco era, wouldn't want you reliving that episode hun. Maybe some Nightfever John travolta moves would go down well with Lin and Dee in their white stilhettos

Take care
Daisybun

'This too will pass'

[manmoor]

Ross I got the perfect costume for you. It's made out of cardboard. I got 24 cereal boxes and glued them all together and painted them added glitter and sparkles and pompoms and boy your gonna look good. Now I'm gonna go start the lyrics for your solo lol.

Take Care

Mandyxx

[scoobygirl2005]

lol Mandy. And what are you going to be wearing then a barbie outfit hehe?

[Ross]

24 cereal boxes? Are you sure thats enough to cover the essential parts? I hope you took into considersation the I am left handed when the drew the Guitar on, afterall, I would look silly playing the thing wrong way round. (not that I wouldnt look silly anyways).

As for the John Travolta moves, Im not sure that my fancy footwork is quite up to that standard, but I will certainly give it a bash. *practices the MoonWalk and falls over* Damn!!! That hurt..... more practice is definately required. *rubs derier*


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Is There Really Gravity, Or Does Earth Just Suck?

[surreylady]

Right thats it, i want in lol. Ok so I cant sing but I can shake my behind pretty good!!! haha.
[:P]

Mandy xx

PS. erm not sure about the pink leather lmao

positive attitude brings positive results

[stace81]

Ross I have an idea. How about you wear a leopard print thong?!
I know you normally reserve that sort of outfit for the bedroom but hey its for a good cause!!!
Just a thought. xx

sford

[Ross]

Leopard Print? No you are right, that normally stays behind closed doors, but I must say, *looking in the mirror* I dont look too bad. *sings Love Shack by B-52's*

Definately not for public show though!


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Is There Really Gravity, Or Does Earth Just Suck?

[t0rt01se36]

Lynn I didn't buy keyboard.

If u really want a boob job, I could always buy keyboard, ask Council 4 a Lincense and busk in town, to get money 4 ur op.

ONLY JOKING

[Granny Primark]

ju,

Thanks for your offer. But im sure with the success were going get il be able to pay for my own boob job.
Ross you say you dont look too bad when you look in the mirror? is that cus youve got a cucumber in yer boxer shorts? and a mask on?
Only joking i think you will be the uks version of justin timberlake.

[redbaron]

OH GOD, Ross in leopard print! Schtop schtop this band is not ready yet!

Such images are not fit for human consumption!

Tho' I can see Ross doing a mean Saturday Night Fever bit, he strikes me as a fella that would try a medallion!

Now I'm off for a frontal lobotomy!

If what doesn't kill us makes us stronger it's a pretty fair bet it's going to hurt.

[Ross]

Right, all this nonsense of costume has to stop.

Remember, we are a 'group' so if I have to wear a Leopard Print thong, you all have to wear one. Thats got you thinking.

So here is a sensible suggestion..... Actually I dont have any sensible suggestions! Damn It! [8)]


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Is There Really Gravity, Or Does Earth Just Suck?

[t0rt01se36]

I agree with Ross.

The nonsense regarding this topic has to stop!!!!!!!!

Final decision on band name yet??

[wobily_lin]

Well well well,

We not even formed the group and there are so many moaners here lol. Ju the name is the maneaters. or maybe the nutters. I'm happy with either me........ Ross we know u dont do sensible hun you're just not capable of it...... hey but neither am I so please do carry on lol..... Dom I see you in leather too now........can't for the life of me think why lol......... Right ladies and errrm ladies What is the name of the song we are going to sing???????? I want real suggestions please as all we are doing here is waisting time and time is of the essence here as with my crap voice I need to start practicing now for next year, to even get me doh in tune ye know... I'm gettin worried bout that and thats not good for my anxiety.
Oh and btw, I think i can get hold of a drum kit. I know a friend who has a friend who knows a friend etc ye know what i mean......... yes its fell off the back of a lorry... but beggars cant be choosers eh. It's for a good cause anyways innit...
Come on pull ur fingers out pplllllllllllllllllllllllllllll...........

Take care,

Lin.
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[Ross]

Ello Ello Ello. PC Plod 'ere. Im investigating the whereabouts of a stolen Drum Kit. I've been given the description of the aformentioned item, and it seems it is heavily damaged due to a fall from a moving lorry.

If you have any information that could help my enquiries, please do not hesitate to call.


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Is There Really Gravity, Or Does Earth Just Suck?

[manmoor]

Well well well,

"Fell off the back of a lorry" Surely it's bound to be damaged if it hit the ground!!!! But then again I trust your judgement Lin. Oh we have a new male interested in the band. Our Cam wants to join if he can play drivin bass. I told him I'd look after him so he stays beside me ok lol.

Take Care

Mandyxx

[Southern_Belle]

Well Lin I have a good song if the men sing somehow as backup how about "We are Family" by Sister Sledge?

Bel

"Our thoughts are our reality"

[lildutt]

mom you dont need the money for the boobie job lol i just give you some of mine
and hey hey dont forget about my lil song lol
bellxxx

[Granny Primark]

Thanks bell il have some of yours.
My hubby keeps saying my shoulder blades are bigger than me bust. Cheeky sod him. Hes certainly got nothing to brag about.
Ive been thinking about songs to sing. I think ju should sing "The hills are alive with the sound of maneaters"
I thinks ross should play the the maracas cus ive heard hes always playing with them. ive also heard youve got a big truncheon p.c plod. But i never believe rumours.
Lin you can play the fiddle cus ive heard that your good on the fiddle.
Bout time now that we should be thinking of rehearsals.
I know someone who works at Parkhurst prison and they said we could use one of there biggest cells there to rehearse in.
Anyone got any better ideas?

[Daisybun]

Not sure cam should play bass while driving, I'm sure that it would be considered dangerous and he could end up with a fixed penalty!!! I know having attended a Driver Awareness course! We are family eh, sounds good, not sure about practising at the prison, if Ross is in leopard skin thong may cause a riot! We could think about doing a Christmas song, rework Fairytale of New York, I'm sure we could do a great Pogues tribute between us, dave 316 could rewrite the lyrics, or Mandy moo and we could have a winner. May have to resort to red shiny thongs, short fluffy red and white skirts and santa hats.

Take care
Daisybun

'This too will pass'

[manmoor]

Oh Daisy what a wonderful idea hun. I've always pictured meself in red shiny thongs, red and white skirt and a wee santa hat oh the kind that flash would be perfect and now I'm going to get the chance oh thank you Daisy for that. I must say tho when Cam asked to play drivin bass I believed him (must be the Irish in me). Ross in thongs??? what about the cardboard outfit I made for him. I wouldnt want him to end up with a rash or owt. If we are doing the gig at Christmas we must start rehearsals so any offers of accomodation for me would be greatly appreciated but if all else fails I could always do a robbery and the prison would take me and I'd be on hand then for the rehearsals. Theres always a method behind me madness lol.

Take Care

Mandyxx

[dee2605]

I seem to be the only regular whose not commented!!!........gawd I love this and it has given me such a laugh!!! The Maneaters don't seem to have a manager (or maybe I missed that)......but maybe I could fill that role! Keeping you lot in order will be a job and a half but im prepared to be a martyr for the cause!.......geeza job!....pleeeeaaaasssseee!!![8D]

[manmoor]

DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE,

Your in love your so in. God a Scottish manager wow thats just what we needed. You do know the pay aint much but hopefully the laugh you get will make up for the loss of earnings. Oh and I need a bed for a week hope your up for that job too lol.

Take Care

Mandyxx

[dee2605]

Aww Mandy.....thanks! LOL Finally a job that might suit my dubious management skills gained within multi-national corporations!!!

First things first:
1. You all need contracts stating that you do not hold NMP or Maneaters liable for any accidents incurred while in the band. eg thongs chaffing your bums or cardboard outfits being set alight! These will be issued in the next week and must be signed & returned within 5 days....just put an X if you cant write your name.
2. The manger has final say on the songs sung (sounds like a thai meal) and suggests "Do they know its xmas" is rewritten by Mandy to reflect band members ideals...........eg "its xmas time, im having a panic attack, its xmas time and ross needs a effing good whack"......
3. Mandy can rent my spare room but will need to share with the rest of you....and no noise after 9pm as my daughter needs her sleep.
4. There's a recording studio in my village where The Jam record....but we cant have it.....but the portakabin in the Village Hall carpark is available!
5. Tried to book the Royal Albert Hall for our first gig, but that bloody Elton John got in first, so we'll be doing the Bathgate Miners Welfare Club instead.

Well thats all for the mo.......and please can all the singers ensure they gargle with TCP to protect their throats (and mainly to get rid of their bad breath as it's a major problem).

From your newly appointed Manager.

Dee (tc xx) lmao

[manmoor]

Dee,

No offence love but you dont expect me to pay rent for this room do you? Love your lyrics lmao. Hope you have a childrens play area near you cos swings and slides are the best rescue remedy ever invented. I must start on the lyrics oh it is getting exciting now.

Take Care

Mandyxx

[dee2605]

Rent free Mandy, but bring your own toiletries, toilet roll and sleeping bag. If you want privacy, bring a tent!......and a potty.

There's a park across the road with child friendly amenities!

Get working on those lyrics and dont come back till there finished!!

LOL

Dee

[Daisybun]

Woohooo we have a manager, or if it is a Christmas theme we're after a manger! What about Cam, Shay and Ross as Three wise men, could be interesting twist on a theme. I got the recording euipment Dee so we can use that portacabin, hope it is sound proofed. What about instruments, I know someone who has a shakey pear, some kazoos and a swanny whistle, and i can get my hands on some sleigh bells, a must if it's a Christmas record. I got a great garden some people can kip in if they bring a tent, also room for one in the summerhouse. Dee you are a slave driver, poor Mandy will be up all night writing that song.

Take care
Daisybun

'This too will pass'

[Granny Primark]

Dee yer cheeky sod, lol
im the manager! lol I desperately need a boob job and other than fill my bra with bog roll or going on the streets to earn enough money, which would take me to the year 220 the only hope ive got is for these talented people on this site to get together and form a group.
Lillbels agreed to perform as a pole dancer, and im doing the choreography, ju ann is our main singer and if you like you can be the one who sorts out where we are first going to do our first gig.
When were at no next xmas with our first single just remember it cus of me and my desperate need for bigger boobs thats inspired everyone.

Take care
LYNN XX

[dee2605]

Blame mandy!!...she gave me the job!! lol.......but I'm happy to be tour manager and sort out gigs instead. So be prepared for the following gigs - we'll travel on an old rusty bus (bust......for Lynn!)

1. John O Groats Scout Hall
2. St Vincent de Paul in Dundee
3. Bykker Grove in Newcastle
4. Durham Miners Welfare
5. Barlinnie Prison Social Club
6. Cheadle Hume Old Folks Day Centre
7. Broadmoor (need special insurance for that gig)
8. Ye old Navvies Head Pub Brixton

Lynn - you realise we might only raise enough for a nipple or one boob at the most? So keep carrying the bog roll or you might me a bit lop-sided!!

Dee xx

[manmoor]

God aint it great that I'm tough skinned and dont get easily offended cos I get the blame for everything lol. As I am a scout leader Dee I coud get us a reduction on the hall at John O'Groats! Ain't Byke Grove a tv programme?????????

Dee your fired!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LMAO

Take Care

Mandyxx

[t0rt01se36]

I no longer want to be part of The Manesters or whatever you want to call yourselves. Sorry!

I've got enough stress in my own life to have time to concentrate on the band.

I haven't got a clear enough voice to sing solo anyway.

Julie x

[Ammeg]

ok so more importantly people- wot will I be doin???? hehe!!!
So we got two managers, afew musicians, a pole dancer...... hmmmm!! lolxxxxxx

[net]

have you got an accountant yet cos you'll need one with the success your bound to have

have you got a pole for the poledancing cos if not i can supply one.



netty


the dreams of the future are better than the history of the past

[Ross]

You lot can always dance around my pole if the worst comes to the worst.


------------------------------------------------
Is There Really Gravity, Or Does Earth Just Suck?

[Daisybun]

Are we having a band split already? Ju you leaving?Oh well, poledancers and a few kazoos it is then. We can take turns like in Do they know its Christmas and that Perfect Day song, always good then no-one has the pressure of doing solos and singing lead. This is gonna be fun, any news on the lyrics yet?

Take care
Daisybun

'This too will pass'

[manmoor]

Gemma I think you could be in charge of lighting. Your bright and you aint as mad as the rest of us so you would be dependable. Ross polish up your pole cos we're going to need it. Netty your our new accountant hope your good with figures!! The lyrics will be ready later today. Dee imagine the cheek of ye wanting to steal Lynns job your brazin you are. You can be the tour manager and sit at the front of the bus with the driver oh the driver we aint got a driver maybe Shay could do that no he cant cos his feet wouldnt reach the pedals so Dom could be our driver. Right need to go get lyrics finished busy busy busy.

Take Care

Mandyxx

[Southern_Belle]

Laughed right out loud at that one Mandy, thank ya gal.

Bel

"Our thoughts are our reality"

[anxious]

cookoo cookoo, the lot of you
mad muppets, lmao,

anx x

Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects

[stace81]

I dont think a male driver is such a good idea, we all know men are crap at directions!
Ross sorry hun but your pole just wont be long enough!!!!
Cant believe there has been a loss of a member already, a replacement will be needed, whos interviewing?!!
Come on Mandy get a bloody move on with those lyrics!!

sford

[Granny Primark]

Great news about the poledancer.
I was at lilbells yesterday and saw how good she really is.
My god the men are going go absolutely crazy when they see the outfits shes got.
I never realised she was a proffessional. Check out this site who she works for. www.palladiumpromotions.com
My hubbys volunteerd be the bus driver, cus thats what he does for a living, but im wondering if I could trust Dee sitting next to him!
stace im putting you in charge of interviewing, but if they really want be in the band then tell them yes if they can supply us with a crate of beer and a dozen bottles of plonk.
Ive never been against a i bit of bribary.

[manmoor]

More lyrics this time to away in a manger at Daisys request!

Away in a nuthouse no brains sense or wit
The no more panic maneaters were rehearsing their hit
Ju was singing lovely with Dee on a high
And Lynn giving orders while the audience sigh
Our Linda is drumming with Lin by her side
And Ross in his cardboard he's wanting to hide
The audience are laughing bet they've sussed we all mad
The singing is delightful but the drumming is bad
We could use more practise if this bands to succeed
A new brain and some sense is what we all need
So Scotty if your up there please beam me up now
And the no more panic maneaters will you please take a bow.

TBC..............

Take Care

Mandyxx

[Lucy36]

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!

Oh lynn

what ave you started here woman!!!!!

ffs my god this post really cheered me up

cheers lynn xxxxx

[Granny Primark]

Hi me old mate lucy,
Glad it cheered you up.
Laughter is what makes the world a happier a place.
Sod the meds.
Get them tatty scones ready for when i next come up to Glasgow!!!!

Take care babe
LYNN xx

[Granny Primark]

Mandy ive heard Robbie Williams wants sign you up to do the lyrics for his new album.
Pse dont desert us when you become really famous.

[Lindalou64]

LMAO MANDYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

FLIPPIN 'A'......LOL GOOD TUNE I THINK THATS GONNA BE RUNNING THRU MY HEAD AT CHRISTMAS AND I WILL GET SOME LOOKS FOR SURE...I THOT THE DRUMMER WAS THE BEST SHE CAN REALLY HOLD A BEAT...LOL SHE LOVES TO BANG!!! AND BANG AGAIN LMAO....LOVE YA U NUT ..................LINDA XXXXXXXXXXXXXX[8D]

[Daisybun]

Hey Mandy what brill lyrics to the tune. They are going to be a hit. I've got a country tune that I had put the words to Away in a manger too, one that you can do a bit of a jig to, could be interesting thought, a barn dance version. Could just see the guys in dungarees and straw in their teeth, not to mention what you could do with bales of hay lol. There could be some dosy doeing and stripping the willow just for fun, not to mention baskets (cases lol).

Take care
Daisybun

'This too will pass'

[tnt808]

Do we have anyone playing bongo's? I mean because I will gladly volunteer my time and my "bongo's". That is if you don't mind a lil' one attatched to one at any given time.

[Granny Primark]

Lol tina, glad youve volunteerd to play yer bongos and we certainly wouldnt mine the attachments!!!
Im certain the males in the audience would love to see yer bongos.

[lildutt]

lmao mom that was suppose to be are lil secret never mind lol
i bet i will have all the men pestering me
and tina lol at you about the bongos
bell xx

[manmoor]

Wow this is getting better bongos hay bales attachments straw. Hey we could be the clampets and Lynn could be the granny I bet one of the guys would make a good Jed cant be Shay he's too short Dom's hairs too long Cam's too tall so Ross your nominated for Jed!!!!. Lindaaaaaaaaaa trust you to take the wrong meaning outta the thing lol.

Take Care

Mandyxx

[Lindalou64]

LOL MANDY WHAT THING????

YA MEAN THE THINGYYYYYYYYYYY..................LOL

LOVE YA.XXXXX [8D]

[Southern_Belle]

Okay..... I have thought long and hard as to what I can contribute to this group, I will be the Cook! Might as well as I have to cook every night anyways, right so if you want me I'll cook for everyone. I'm looking up all british and irish recipes as I type. I know that Ross will be looking over my shoulder all the time and curry will be served! Promise no grits!



Bel

"Our thoughts are our reality"

[tnt808]

Yay Laura!

Curry is a must...can you make it w/tofu? Super spicy? Like put hair on your chest spicy!!




"Be The Change You Want To See In The World"...

Take Care of You,


Tina

[Ammeg]

mmmmmm-
can u make me something with squash (ur version lol) in it please laura??? I wanna try it!!
thankyou!!
gemxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Daisybun]

I thought it was the men we were eating lol
We're gonna need a mighty big tour bus at this rate

Take care
Daisybun

'This too will pass'

[Southern_Belle]

Well Daisy we need to keep our strength up don't we?
Yes Gem dear I will make you some good ole' USA squash! Tina, I may need some help with the curry bit as I have never cooked it before, just added that for Ross' sake as he always is trying to get me to eat it...

Bel

"Our thoughts are our reality"

[Ross]

If your having Curry, I advise your Tour Bus has a 'convinience' on board. :D


------------------------------------------------
Is There Really Gravity, Or Does Earth Just Suck?

[t0rt01se36]

The good news is that I want to re join The Man Eaters. The bad news is that I want to be Promotions Assistant or something and NOT a singer. I really enjoy doing desk top publishing and spreading the word around.

[manmoor]

I've just been re-reading this old thread and if anyone needs cheering up today this thread is perfect for it as its so funny :yesyes: xxx

[Granny Primark]

Omg mandy id forgotton how funny this thread was.
Its cheered me up today and made me feel like the old loopylynn again. (mad, insane, crazy and in need of growing up! lol)
Happy days mandy! Wobbilylin was so funny and there was always so much laughter and support going on in the chatroom both day and night. Never any arguments just genuine clean fun. It certainly helped me a lot.

Take care
LYNN xx

[bottleblond]

lmfao rofl pmsl..... your all nuts, barkin, needing yir bumps felt (no not them bumps mandy). :doh:

Sure, ye can't take that one anywhere but ye have to go back and bleedin appologise,

Brilliant thread!!!! Loved it and it had me in stitches (no, not them stitches mandy) :unsure:



lisa
xxxxxx

[pink daisy]

Can I be a MAN eater??? Do i Qualify??

[Granny Primark]

Defo kate!!!!
But man? lol More like men! lol
You no need audition when we start organising another group for x factor youl be my number 1 band member.
Hope youve got your basque and suspenders ready!
My nora batty stockings have been washed along with my granny knickers.

[manmoor]

Pink course you can be a man eater :D but you do know that there are other qualities attached to the job too :ohmy: one needs to have a good singing voice and also be good at making costumes at short notice :yesyes: I'd recommend Lisa for the hiring and firing job as shes got a very good head on her shoulders and can be quite sensible when she puts her mind to it and keeps off the facepacks :lac: (not that they do her any good anyway) :doh: Granny you've now been reinstated in your old job :yahoo: but mind the pay terms and conditions so dont be getting above yer station now :roflmao: xxxxx

[pink daisy]

Mandy

I can sing in Tune does this count? lol And i am good at designing costumes but cant sew but I know a lady that does.. But I need to be in as this maybe the only way to get to meet Simon 4 real!! lol

Daisy

[manmoor]

Lol Pink hun your hired :yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes: xxx

[bottleblond]

Mandy, how rude!! i'll have you know that it's them face packs that keep me youthfull good looks!! aye aye aye ok, you win, tosh they are and a bloomin waste of money, anyway sure ye can't improve on perfection!? :shades:


Love Lisa
xxxx

[Granny Primark]

Pink im not bothered if you can sing in tune. I just need to know that you can sing solo.
So low we cant bloody hear you!
Forget about the face packs lisa use what i use a paper bag over my head.

Take care
LYNN xx

[bottleblond]

Aye Lynn, that's me, a double bagger! i got to wear two incase one falls off and i give some poor begger the fright of their life. lol

Lynn, i can sing a brilliant rendition of "show me the way to go home" after 6 cans so i recon i should be on lead vocals. Don't be giving that Mandy one lead coz it will only go to her head and she sounds like a cat on heat anyway :ohmy:.

Ok i'm running like the wind now before me Mandy catches me and gives me a thick ear!!! :noangel:


xxxxxxxx

[Lindalou64]

LOL Mandy and Lynn i forgotten about this myself, hell where did my drums go.........oh i remeber now i left them in the bathroom wasnt i cleaning it and got involved and got BUSY.....LOL .........basterd stole my drums.....

[Granny Primark]

Dont worry about about your drums linda.
You can play your maracas instead.
Im hoping I can be the one to do the choreography ive always been good at handwriting.
Oh soz thats caligraphy isnt it? At my age I forget me damn name and which jar me teeth are in.
Me hubbys always reckoned ive got talent and would go far. The bloody farther the better.
Nowt wrong with the sound of a cat on heat lisa I just hope mandy doesnt go shoving her bum in the air when shes singing!

Take care
LYNN xx

[bottleblond]

rofl, lmfao, pmsl....oh Lynn the bleedin vision you just gave me then was hilarious!!! i'm scarred for life now! pmsl

Lisa
xxx

[Lindalou64]

Lol Lynn Good One ...................poor Dopey Mandy ........but You Know We Love Ya.........where The Hell Ya Been Anyways

[manmoor]

Well now that Lisa is going to get a good slap for laughing at my expense :yahoo: Granny I think its time you took yer job seriously and by all means ask me for advice about anything as my general knowledge is most excellent (I have 5 Pcse's) :roflmao: Linda get them drums looked out lovie cos we is going on tour :yesyes: As most of the other people from the original group of maneaters has retired due to getting well we do need to recruit new members so if anyone is interested feel free :yesyes: xxx

[pooh]

I can play the xylophone and do a mean number on the triangle, so I'm quite a versatile musician. I'm not too bad an actress should we have to fake a band member fall out to get extra press coverage.....only problem is....I don't look good in anything green and slinky, or pink, or orange or cerise for that matter.

I, unfortunately am also unable to wear high heels due to a standing on the bed hanging curtains falling off and damaging ankle accident some years ago in which I fainted, came round and promptly spewed on the newly fitted carpet. Would flatties be ok?

I'm willing to travel (but due to a slight agoraphobic problem, not by plane train or on motorways, however I believe were there is a will there is always a way, or a quick prescription from the doctor, anyway...).

I am also willing to give up the child, cats, b/f and home to pursue the celebrity and fame of being a Maneater (but not my weekly episode of house and chance to drool over Hugh Laurie).But still it's a level of committment I'm sure will be appreciated by band management.

Oh! Do you have the services of a band beautician? It's just that until i get my brows looking less like the australian outback (bushy), I really think it could impact on the image of the band.

Look forward to hearing from you about any available positions.

Lynne x

[Granny Primark]

Right change of plan!!!!
How about if we audition for the next Britains got talent?
Pooh im amazed at just how much you would give up just to be famous.
Forget the prescription off the doctor cus you cant travel by train, plain or on motorways.
Ive got the ideal solution. Ive got a pair of skates size 6 and ive also got a pushbike. You can take your pick pooh.
Ive got some dog shears for your eyebrows, so you wont want the beautician. And ive also got some pollyfilla so no one needs go to the expense of collegen injections/face lifts or anti wrinkle creams.
Mandy your not the only one with qualifications. Ive got 2 A levels.
One in mugging and the other in theft.
Any suggestions as regards what the maneaters can sing would be welcome.
Me hubbys suggested we sing "over the hill and far away" (ive never heard that song)

Take care
LYNN xx

[t0rt01se36]

Retired?? Me? naahhhhhhhh, count me in. Won't b travelling 2 X Factor so this is the next best thing.
Wheres that Panic bus when we need it?

[manmoor]

Pooh your in hun :yesyes: The next Britains got talent sounds the bizz ladies I think if we practise enough in the next few months we'd walk it :D I cant believe that Granny has never heard of Over The Hill And Far Away its a really old song :ohmy: :yahoo: Ju-Ann I'm glad your back to join us as your the only one with a good singing voice so far. Pooh I think we might ask Phill to play the Diggeredo cos if its good enough for Rolf Harris its good enough for him :roflmao: xxxx

[pooh]

YAY I"M IN! I"M IN!

I'll have to start work on my acceptance speech for when we win the Brits.

In the meantime Mandy, I ain't walkin' anywhere, as Granny assures me I have a choice of skates or a push bike, I'm going to opt for the skates. Will just get myself along to Halfords for safety helmet, knee pads, shin pads, elbow pads, safety goggles and safety gloves, and bubble wrap the rest of myself incase I fall. A girl can't be too cautious!

Thank you so much for helping me out with the eyebrow problem Granny, got me thinking, might have to hire an industrial strimmer to do the legs and bikini line too.

Mandy, I am well in with the idea of Phill and his diggeredoo, but are australian's allowed to take part in BRITAIN' got talent? Someone may have to use their talents to ensure he's able to participate.

I was giving the small matter of what to sing some thought. What about "Flying Without Wings"? We could add the twist of actually stage diving off the stage onto the judges just to show that we really can fly without wings.

Thank you SO SO SO much for letting me be a part of this.... I'm off to start on my acceptance speech, so many people to thank.... my mum, dad, sister, doctor, psychologist, pyschiatrist, pharmacist...............

[Granny Primark]

Pooh its a pleasure!
Ive had a brill day today ive found out primark is giving us discount on our clothes for the show!
Half price for knickers, jelly bras and black socks!!!!
How good is that?!?!?!
So the outfit is sorted!
Im planning my acceptance speach at the brits.
My first thanks will go to my dentist for my teeth that are now sparkling clean and in a jar in the bathroom,
then I will thanks Boots chemist for all the anti wrinkle cream ive bought from them.
And last but not least........
tena lady!!!!!!!!!!!!
What would i do without my tena lady?

Take care
LYNN xx

[pooh]

Excellent news on the outfits! Think Tena would give us sponsorship? lmfao

[kellie]

omg pooh you better hope the do sponser you cos half the friggin country will be sueing when you lot make em pmsl.
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
kellie xxxxx