View Full Version : How bad is everyone's health anxiety?
Just as it says in the title really, health anxiety effects me everyday I will wake up with aching shoulders, headaches, twitching all sorts of symptoms that lead me to think the worst and it's all I think about everyday all day, was just wondering if anyone else suffers the same and if anything can help the aches and pains?! X
Hi Izzie :)
I am the same as you, i wake up with a new symptom everyday. At the moment it seems to be headaches, dizziness and brain zaps, last week i had a sore neck/throat (which once i stopped fretting about, disappeared) the week before it was joint and muscle pain all over.. and so on.
I don't go a minute without thinking about my HA or symptoms, never mind a day :roflmao: then once a new symptom comes up, i link it to the one's I had recently and come up with a ridiculous self diagnosis :lac:
Personally i haven't found anything to work to stop the aches and pains, except trying to not fixate on it, this really does amplify whatever you are feeling. However i know how hard it is not to do this. As soon as i seem to conquer one symptom another will crop up :doh:
Hope you feel better soon :)
Mine is terrible. Feel free to read my threads to see whats going on and the lengths I will go to when I have a symptom. My big fear is cancer and as soon as I get a pain or some symptom I google it with the word 'cancer' and convince myself thats what I have. I can even get so far as picturing the tumours position in my body. I then dont sleep, have bad dreams, don't eat so I lose weight which then I think is another symptom! I have even got so bad I have discussed with my ex husband what will happen to the kids when Im gone and begged him not to let me be forgotten. I join chat forums on cancer sites which, when I think about it is despicable as the people I talk to are actually living with or related to someone with this disease. My relationship suffers and everyone, including my kids, gets upset and stressed.
I have started a course of cbt which hopefully will help and I am seeing a psychologist on Monday.
I annoy the hell out of drs going back lots to see different ones for another opinion, I ring NHS direct, cancer research and macmillan helplines and I have spent hundred of pounds I can't afford on private appointments and tests.
I hope I may have made you feel less alone with this. Maybe you will feel more normal after reading how bad I am!
Andrea x
Thank you both for your replies! I can relate to both of them, Andrea mine effects my relationship aswell! It feels as if I am driving everyone mad never mind just the doctors! Does it stop you both from doing social things? I can't go anywhere without worrying about something bad happening to me! Hope you both feel better soon x x
Yes it completely does stop me from doing social things. I went out last weekend with friends for one of their birthdays for the first time in almost 2 months! I was looking forward to it all week, then when it came to that day i started to panic. I felt so anxious before i left the house, but i made myself do it and ended up really enjoying myself :)
I try not to do anything too physical, so that i can't injure myself in anyway. even a bruise makes me panic, which is ridiculous.
You are not alone in this by any means! I can also relate to feeling like a nuisance, and it annoys me when doctors brush you off as being a paranoid hypochondriac. This is truly something that you cannot understand unless you are experiencing it, or have experienced it yourself.
Take Care
TotallyBonkers
01-02-13, 15:47
This is a good question as it gives each and every one of us a chance to say how bad it can get, and then shows that we are not alone.
For me I can honestly say that my HA is not a constant thing that I live with (thank god).
I have said in a couple of other posts that my main fear is Cancer in particular of the Cervix, I honestly don't know why it is attached to that, but for some reason it just is.
It is to the point where I am too afraid to go for smear tests, and then when something happens to my periods out of the norm I then start to think oh god its Cervical Cancer. I have recently gone for a smear test as have some problems with my period and am now awaiting the results. This has set off my anxiety big time!
The time before this one was again when I had to have a smear as I had waited 9 years since the last one, this time it was 6 years that I went without getting one done. I am a typical Ostrich hiding head in the sand kind of person, which I KNOW is stupid as my logical side shouts at me, but the HA side seems to take over.
When I am suffering from my HA I can honestly say that thoughts of Cervical Cancer consume me, from the minute that I get up to the minute that I eventually drop off to sleep.
I feel distant from my husband and family, like I can not join in with them because although there physically my head is away with the fears of Cancer.
I get myself so worked up that I begin to shake (the kind of shake you do when you have a bad temprature) even though my temp is normal, which then means I tense my whole body up causing aches and pains all over the place.
I can not concentrate on anything, not the tv, not a book, not talking with family or friends it basically strips me bare when it comes to being social and interacting with others.
I play through scenarios in my mind of what would happen if the worse did happen, would my husband cope with the three children? How would the children cope without me? I then think of the end days when Cancer could finally take hold of me, wasting away, weak and frail and then feel that I could not bare for my family to see me this way, so would just want to take myself off somewhere away from them, the thought of them watching me die...well there are no words to describe how I feel about that.
Then logic brain kicks in again and I am able to reason with myself so that those horrible thoughts go out of my mind for a while, and then I am just back to the "normal" panic (which is far from normal) that I put myself through.
I drive my husband mad constantly asking him, do you think I have cancer? etc, etc and though he is very good I know it drives him potty, it drives me potty too!
What I do know is that if the smear comes back OK, then I know that the HA will instintly dissappear, until such time as the next smear is due.
It is a viscious circle that I am determined to break, but one thing for sure I am going to start going every time I am called for a smear from now on as I feel that is a major step in breaking this cycle of fear.
I dont go anywhere if I can avoid it. I even panic in the supermarket. Its a nightmare. I can't work when Im really bad. My stomach is so tied in knots I can't eat at the moment so I am losing weight. My HA tells me its lung cancer causing the weight loss even though I was my usual weight with a good appetite until I started worrying.
People on here have said I just need to believe the doctors and I know thats true but my HA is winning the battle at the moment.
If the pains would just go my life will go back to normal.
My partner is at his wits end that I wont believe what the medics are saying.
My health anxiety is really bad, especially at night. I have constant chest pains and despite the doctors saying its epigastric pain im convinced its my heart or lungs and I dont think I will ever believe them. I have had ecg's, bloods etc but still the pain persists and I feel that every day is my last x
TotallyBonkers
01-02-13, 16:45
andrea, I can really sympathise with the HA voice winning the battle over the rational voice...it is so frustrating at times when we try to be reasonable, but then bang back to sheer panic. Can I ask with your pains, do you find them worse at any particular time or is it constant and levelled out to the same amount of pain all the time?
I have had every cancer going in my body over the years. Breast,ovarian,brain,lung and I am back on to brain tumour. Everytime I get used to my symptoms another new one comes along. I woke up 2 month ago with vertigo and off balance and instantly thought brain tumour and now I have headaches and pressure in my head, awful brain fog which is confirming my fears. Seeing an ent specialist next week but seen a gp this morning and told him about thinking it was a brain tumour and he said there was nothing to suggest a brain tumour. So why when i put my symptoms in does brain tumour and ms come up.
My partner also gets frustrated with me and all my family suffer.
It seems a lot of us are suffering this horrid anxiety! I think about it literally every minute, my worries are more that something bad happens suddenly and I'm going to have to be rushed in to an ambulance! I always say I feel scared in my own body which is the best way to describe it for me. Hope everyone feels better soon I am starting counselling soon hoping it will help, take care everyone x x
almamatters
01-02-13, 18:12
My HA has been pretty awful for a long time. I am cancer phobic for sure, I have diagnosed myself with cancer in just about every part of my body. I wake up with random different symptoms everyday, my doctor is not concerned about me, and I am trying to trust him . I have to tell myself that they are trained professionals , they know what they are doing and if they are concerned about symptoms they will refer you for tests.
mrs way to worried
01-02-13, 18:20
Mine is constant and everyday I get to points so low I have considerd suicide and at some points have self harmed just to focus my pain else where it scares me so much I have had the same pains every day for 4 and half years they get worse everday and EVERY problem I have is on my right side even if I have a sore throat its only on one side ,trouble swallowing is one side ect ect ect :(
Yes it makes me feel suicidial! Not that I would dare do anything but it does make me feel life is just miserable, yes I find it hard to be convinced by doctors I leave feeling reassured then when I panic I forget it all and think they missed something, it's very tiring!
Started off when I put on BP meds I thought..BP meds at the age of 21? I'm fit young and healthy why the hell do I have high BP, started thinking I suffer from heart failure or conginental heart condition and instantly thought I was going to die. When you see people running marathons dieing and fabrice muamba having cardiac arrest at 24, Zyzz (who was a bodybuilder) dieing at 22 from conginental heart failure which wasn't picked up when he was born, all of these things make me worse. I've pretty much come off it..kind of, I don't think I have any heart problems as I've been seeing cardiologist's and they said my valve's and everything is working fine, the MRI showed my liver/kidney and every other important organ in my body doing what it should. (This MRI was about april time last year i think)
Anyways, now I'm suffering from brain anxiety, pressure in my head on the right side, making my face feel as if it's swollen, tinnitus and pressure in my ear, with twitching eye lid and temple to add into the mix.
I love it at home, but..I can just feel my anxiety worsen when I'm at home, I'm happiest when I'm around my friends and at uni, even if it means doing work :P
Overal, I would say my anxiety isn't as bad as some people's but who am I to judge when I don't know anyone here, it's definetely doing my head in, sometimes I feel as if I should just end it, even though I love life.
Rvp that's similar to what I am feeling now brain anxiety the left side of my head feels like pressure and my left cheek feels like I have been hit in it, left sided earache and awful brain fog. My left eye feels odd like its tired and blurry, fatigue and vertigo on top of all that. Its horrible.
Last year I had the worst bout of HA. For at least 8 months, I couldn't bring myself to do anything. I'm constantly thinking about my symptoms, and imagined I had every imaginable cancer there is.
The problem with my HA is, I have no one to talk to. I know we have this forum and all, but it's just not the same as having someone physically to talk to.
My wife knows about my condition briefly and is supportive the whole time but most of the time, I just don't feel like sharing too much details with her. I fear I would make myself look silly and weak. My family depend on me as I'm the sole bread winner. So despite my HA, somehow I feel I need to be larger than life. Putting up a false front and showing "strength" is mentally taxing. I crumbled silently by myself countless times while everyone else is asleep. Although having said that, thankfully I was never suicidal.
I do enjoy periods of good times when I was symptom free. My latest HA-free period lasted a year! The feeling was great. But lately, it started again. sigh. Yup, like everyone else here, I hate that anxious feeling.
I'm feeling very bad right now, I've always suffered with social anxiety , low self esteem, achieveing most things in my life either just adequet or 2nd best, hence my current complicated situation but 'I've made my bed, so I must now lye on it' .
Lately things have become unbearable for me, its hard for me to talk about, as there are moral dilema's involved that I feel I cannot turn my back on.
I currently have a raging toothache , 2 hours sleep last night, I cannot see a dentist as my bout of conjunctivitus is still clearing up.
As for my family (parents), I've not spoken to my parents for 6yrs now, my mother thinks I'm 'evil' when really they've never shown confidence in my ability's as an adult & they gave me an extremely sheltered upbringing, I resent them for this as they wont admit & just give excuses, I have one brother who I've recently built more of a close relationship with.
I'm married & have 2 boys, 17 & 8 years, the 17yr old has left home after giving us serious problems giving me no other alternative but to out him after repeated un-acceptable issues in 2011, , 8yr old son has autism & has habit of shaking head from side-to-side at any source of light, this sometimes results in him self harming (possible epilepsy link)
My wife is lazy , yes lazy & she always has been, i've tried but failed to motivate & change her, she's never worked & is shy of housework, the current situation is complcated cus of our youngest son, I currently have no income to my own name.
I was made redundent in jan 2010 from my part time job as a delivery driver (a job which I really enjoyed as no-one to 'bother' me), with great hours to suit as my 8yr old is a real handfull, now more-so as he's got older.
I'm now classed as neither 'employed' OR unemployed as my youngest is a real handfull even when my wife does pull her weight.
Its now seems I'm 'behind in my NI contributions' so I'll not get a pension, but TBH I dont think I'll reach 65 & the way I'm feeling lately I've lost the motivation to carry on with my life.
Friends? I have no real friends, Its proven (yes I've been tested as I doubted) I have above average intellence slightly OCD, a perfectionist but I'm a failure when it comes to makeing / keeping friends, conversation, I can think of several intstances of sometimes humilliateing rejection, I seem to give out 'vibes' of expecting rejection. -
I fear for the future, I want out , I really cannot take much more of this situation
Hey Dave. This made me very emotional. I really feel for you not that thats much help I know. I hope you find this site useful for airing your thoughts and fears as you have no one to talk to. Have you tried any kind of therapy at all?
Hi!
I wake up most mornings in pain, my latest has been neck, shoulder and back between shoulder blades pain was at doctors on wednesday for neck and shoulder pain, she examined me had a good feel around areas and said all was fine, excepted it until friday! went back cause the pain got worse or felt worse and the back pain between shoulder blades was very uncomfortable and I read on the internet bout lung cancer (tut tut ) seen a different doctor and she too examined me listened to chest, heart did blood pressure and she said all was good, why wont I just accept that! iv even thought today that it could be a blood clot, im just so fed up of it.
I have CBT on the 8th Feb so hopefully it will help.. hugs to all on here as we all no what the next person is going through :hugs:
Baaaaaaaaad!!!! 2 years I've had this now, it was a shock then and heartbreaking. I suffered a breakdown and then never had b4 BUT started having panic attacks and everything and every symptom that goes with it. Two years on , not sooo shocking just F****** annoying. Just when I start to get myself back out to work I find it unbearable and have to leave half way through the day. I only do 1 day and if I'm a bit under the weather and then the health anxiety kick in - I've had it. I have to fight my way through the rest of the day BUT last week I just couldn't do it. Infuriates me, why oh why does it have to exist?
Hi mozzi. Also worried about lungs and had clear xray and bloods but still in a terrible state. Losing weight as not able to eat much, rationally its the anxiety, HA says another 2 symptoms of cancer. Drs have said nothing to worry about. I want a ct scan but they wont do one. Had back and shoulder blade pain last year. Dr said muscular but I didn't remember doing anything to it but it went after two weeks. Hope yours is better soon x
Its getting worse everyday. Its making my depersonalization worse and its making my life hell.
Hi Andrea15!
Thanks for your post good to no others have had same problems and it turned out to be nothing serious, its just hard to forget about pains so they pass, i'v had my neck and shoulder pains a while, the second doctor I seen on Friday was going to send me for an xray until I mentioned I had one months ago cause I was taken to hospital cause I had chest pains with left arm pain, she said she didn't think I needed another one when that one was clear, plus she said there not good to keep havin, she is probably right but it doesn't help me.
My last hospital trip turned out to be down to a panic attack, god those things suck!!.. :)
Grrrrrr. that darn Health Anxiety, I could write a book from all the things I worry about, but the latest is my heart, and it's been the heart for a little while now, and on top of that if I get any other weird feeling, I will also worry about it even if I have had test done, still worry. IT NEVER ENDS...........:hugs:
JulieJay92
02-02-13, 20:45
mine is terrible re heart and stroke
i have had ecgs done in the past numerous times but none since 2009 though all my drs blood tests etc were normal
Hi Panickyme!
I bet if you wrote a book it would be like alot of us had wrote the book aswell, its so hard to believe that one problem can cause so many pains and fears,
My doctor thinks she is reasuring me when she tells me HA is on the increase! It doesn't reasure me it saddens me to think there are more ppl having to go through this awful thing, I know their is help out there for it but the waiting lists are so long, and thats if its available in the areas, I was on a waiting list for 4 months! go for my first CBT next Friday so im hopeful..:hugs:
Awwww Mozzi I know it stinks. (and it is so sad) Here in the US when can get an appointment the next day, BUT.........it is soooooooo expensive. So I think many suffer because they can't afford it. Some insurances will cover it. I am so glad for you that your 4 months of waiting is finally here. Good luck on Friday, let me know how it goes.:hugs:
Thanks panickyme, I will post on Friday after my appointment, im nervous about the appointment cause I have no idea what to expect, but I will keep ppl posted so they will no what to expect if or when they are given the help, it probably takes longer here to get in for CBT cause its free on the nhs which is a good thing, it means ppl go for the help they so need..
Speak soon..:hugs:
I have to do my cbt at home and just talk to them every two weeks on the phone but Im seeing a private psychologist on monday so I have someone to talk to.
Is cbt working for you Andrea? I am fed up with HA now, making life hell!
It affects me pretty much every day. I don't have much family - my immediate family are dead and those that remain are not close to me. They phone me maybe a couple of times a year and when people contact you so infrequently, you can't go through all the problems you've had since you last spoke - just too much to say if I did.
I have a couple of friends but they don't live near me. I do text them every day but I notice when I am getting extremely anxious and worried about things, they don't reply. Maybe they don't know what to say? Doesn't exactly help me though...
Work is awful. My colleagues don't like me in the main. The way they interact with me compared to how they interact with each other is very different and I feel so upset most of the time I am there. I try to put a brave face on things and be friendly but they're not a nice bunch of people sadly and they snipe at each other a lot.
I really need to move house as where I live now is tying me to the job but I'm terrified of doing so. I know I have to do it because if I carry on living where I live, I will not be able to escape this employer. I can only commute to this town from my house sadly.
That sounds hard for you rb1978! I understand what you mean about your friends not knowing what to say, I suppose it must be hard if they don't experience what we are going through. Can one of your friend's not help you look for another house? You might feel more relaxed with other people going with you, hope you feel better soon! X
Luckily one of my colleagues (one of the two who actually seem decent) has offered to help me look for a house. It scares me cos I like the area I live in but if I stay there I don't see any way away from this job. Only one employer in my sector in the one town I can commute to.
Trouble is when you're unhappy you mull over health things a lot more - vicious circle.
Hi all!
went for my first session of CBT today, it was good, we spoke in depth about what my issues are and he came to the conclusion that it is H A I have, and that I will be be seen again for the course which he said will be between 4-8 sessions im really hopeful that it will work for me, I need it to work for me! I had my 10 year old son telling me that an ulcer on his lip was lip cancer, im disgusted with myself for allowing this to happen! :lac: and it is all what he has picked up from hearing me say. :weep:
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.