severe mental health anxiety

[lotus]

Hi, just needed to share

I constantly worry about having all sorts of mental health issues. I mostly think I might be an undiagnosed and untreated bipolar. I cannot accept that I can feel this horrible, helpless, severely suicidal and out of control because of anxiety/depression. I have periods of intense anger, hate, and irritability, which I think are the bipolar hypomanic moments. And also, when I first started taking Citalopram many years ago /I'm not taking anything right now/, I believe I might have experienced regular hypomania, but I'm not sure. I thought I looked pretty and wanted to buy new clothes and have my hair done and put on a lot of make up, wanted to go out partying, and was much more social than usual, I went on dates with guys /didn't sleep with them though/... I don't know. I think no one is taking me seriously. What should I do?

I constantly read about diagnoses on the internet and freak out all the time. Everything I read about seems to fit me in terms of symptoms. Even now as I'm typing this I feel like I'm losing control and going crazy, and I feel nauseous and want to call an ambulance to take me to the hospital. What is wrong with me :((( I want to have a proper diagnosis and treatment. I don't believe this is anxiety... Even if it is anxiety, it must be really severe, since I have constant mind chatter, constant feelings of going crazy and losing control and losing my grip on reality, sensorimotor ocd, pure-o ocd, social anxiety... how is it possible that I have so many things all at once :(((

[Paulac]

I could have wrote this post myself, in fact Iv wrote something almost the same, asking if I could have health anxiety about mental illnesses instead of pysical illness, I constantly think i have to have something more than anxiety cus I really feel like I'm loosing the plot!! Iv diagnosed myself with every mental illness u cud think of, bipolar being one of the more recent ones, lol. I think just because u feel soooo bad at times doesn't mean u have bipolar, alot of people have bad depression and feel suicidal at times during there dark moments. I think the whole citalopram thing sounds pretty normal to me, just sounds like u were getting the benefits of them, they wer helping ur mood so naturally you would feel better and want to make an effort, I definitely relate to this, wen I'm feeling crap I cudnt care less wat state I look but as my moods improve I want to look nice n feel good, Iv started citalopram again and I do find them really helpful. I think maybe cus u have this bipolar thing in ur head ur looking for any wee sign or symptom to prove u do have I done exactly the same.

Have u ever actually spoke to a doctor and told him ur fears, maybe it wud put ur mind at rest if u did. Sorry for the longggg reply but u really do sound exactly like me n I hope I maybe helped u even a tiny bit.

Paula x

[lotus]

Thank you Paula

Doctors dismiss my concerns about being bipolar as hypochondria. One doctor said I might have some emotional instability, but that's not bipolar. I think they don't take me seriously. I'm in a great deal of distress as I feel I don't know what's wrong with me and can't accept this is anxiety....