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redbaron
05-09-06, 03:38
I had never thought about OCD as such, always associated it with people who had to wash their hands or kept thinking about turning things off, the stereotypical stuff. I came to terms with the fact that I had some mental health issues to sort out some time ago but thought it was more down to classic depression, anxiety that kind of thing. It was only recently when I spoke to a friend of a friend who was doing an extensive post-grad study into OCD and he mentioned it might be worth getting checked out that it even entered my head. The doctor confirmed with things that I described that it was a realistic possibility.

I have had a few things which with the benefit of hindsight might seem a little obsessive, only they never seemed obsessive to me before, that was normality.

Organising certain key things: I have a lot of LPs, CDs tapes, DVDs and videos. They must be ordered properly, by which I mean seperated off into sections, put in chronological order and preferably height order if applicable and they must be all on the shelf sticking out the same amount, I cannot stand them being out of place. I don't like going to someone else's house where theirs are out of place, it's all I can do not to organise them for them.

I hate it when you have books of a theme that don't go together because of vastly varying heights.

And I hoard on themes too, I'll get into a particular thing and I'll want everything pertaining to it, everything, sometimes particular themes will pass but others keep going, there is no real enjoyment from the things they are just things and the quest to have everything associated is a never ending one. It makes me broke which makes me have serious debt problems which makes me depressed, and yet next pay check, there I am again.

I am now on med (Cipramil 20mg) which is supposed to be potentially good for depression or OCD, maybe this will help.

I wanted mainly to ask, in layman's terms if what I am experiencing is akin to what other people who have been diagnosed with OCD experience, if it is then I have some research to do I guess, if it isn't then perhaps I have even more. I know little about this condition that is clear and I do not wish to be hypochondriacal about things.

thanks for your time.

“There is a certain sort of man who ignores his own good qualities but is tormented by his bad ones, this is the man who writes about himself.”
-W. Somerset Maugham

bluesparkle
05-09-06, 09:00
hi
well you are not alone...
i now know i have had problems since i was young but i guess i really never knew why i did certain things...
i have to have things in certain places... a few examples, cds in right place, things on shelves a certain way, keys hung up in right order, curtains must be straight, clothes put away in a certain order, there are far to many "odd" things that i feel i need to do to list but when i am really anxious and panicky it is alot worse. i am slowly recovering after being at my worst last year i hope that one day i will not feel compelled to do any of it but one thing i have learnt is that the less notice you take of it it does get better i mean like dont beat yourself up about doing it if you feel you have to then do it as the more i fight it the worse it would make me feel. i am not very good at explaining myself and i know this isnt much help but just wanted to let you know you are not alone. but please shout if you want a natter im sure others will be along soon.
take care
rach

redbaron
05-09-06, 10:50
Hi Rach,

no you expressed yourself quite well enough, and thank you for taking the time, you're right it does matter about feeling alone in this and I'm glad there are others who can understand. I guess from having thought things were normal then to have it all turned on its head and realise that most people don't do this makes one feel a bit freakish at first.

It is interesting that those who don't know me very well thought it was a joke because I'm so untidy, whilst those who know me very well have come across my particular routine things and were able to understand better. The reason I'm messy is because I haven't time to order everything properly so I concentrate on certain ones that can stay static and not offend me.

I realised recently having been off for 3 months that I am very ritualistic, I have to get out of bed at exactly the same time and do the same things in the same order every day, if there is a window in my routine I don't know what to do with myself. I find I watch a repeat of a program I've seen the day before just because I know it's on at the same time every day and there's nothing else to do at that time.

I don't know if that makes any sense.

“There is a certain sort of man who ignores his own good qualities but is tormented by his bad ones, this is the man who writes about himself.”
-W. Somerset Maugham

bluesparkle
05-09-06, 14:38
yes that makes sense too...
i am quite ritualistic too although i am trying slowly to break this... but i like things planned and when it has to change i find this hard to deal with... also like you say if i have some time with nothing planned it is awful as i dont know what to do with myself either... i get in quite a tiz!
or go and check things are in there right place again which i dont want to do.
i dont think it is freakish ... i think there are far more of us around than we think...
my mates that i spend alot of time with realised that i was doing things differently... moving stuff etc they just thought it was part of me it was then that i realised i had a problem with it.
hope you are having a good day
rach

redbaron
05-09-06, 16:03
Thx Rach you too I hope.

I know what you mean about the things changing, a really silly example is that because of the time I get up and the time I eat etc. I would sit down and watch Lovejoy on ITV3, but they keep changing the time from 12.15 to 12.35 and 12.20 and it affects the time I make my lunch and it drives me round the bend, I end up not eating at all and then I'm hungry so I eat later and that sods up dinner time.

I mean it's a tv program ffs, but it comes at a time when there isn't anything else regular to time my day by.

“There is a certain sort of man who ignores his own good qualities but is tormented by his bad ones, this is the man who writes about himself.”
-W. Somerset Maugham

juju
05-09-06, 19:10
hi hun,
it def sounds like ocd, i have had this myself, i went on fluoxitine (prozac) which is for ocd/depression and they helped me break all the cycles, the rituals/ritualistic thoughts, disturbing images etc, i still have to have things straight and even etc, but i dont go overboard no more/ my life revolved around it before, i didnt realise i had it cos i had done these symmetrical things since childhood.
pm me any time.
julie

we are all stronger people after having this

net
05-09-06, 19:26
i have to keep my books in order either alphabetical if by the same author and height. i also have to keep checking things. ive just recently moved my furniture around because my computer was offending me as it threw the balance of the room. i like symetry too. i'm on prozac and its eased the ocd

netty

the dreams of the future are better than the history of the past

redbaron
06-09-06, 14:05
I wish they'd make books all the same height so they could be ordered properly, like LPs and DVDs, I hate not being able to put books by the same order or of the same genre together.

“There is a certain sort of man who ignores his own good qualities but is tormented by his bad ones, this is the man who writes about himself.”
-W. Somerset Maugham