playing pool

[maximus1975]

couple of weeks ago an old friend got in contact with me and asked me if i'd like to join his pool team, and to join him for a practice session round his house i said yes, anyway on the day he was coming to pick me up i was a bag of nerves, there were gunna be three other people there i didnt no and the what if's were coming into my head fainting, anxiety attack and just generally making a foll of myself any way i got there took a bottle of squash with me, he had a load of beer in his fridge in the pool room and said help yourself i said i was fine on squash, once i settled down abit the nerves went away and i enjoyed the evening, we did exactly the same this tuesday again i stuck to my squash.
anyhow on friday we had our first match so we went to his house practised , then went to the pub we were playing against i was on lemonade . nervous but not really bad anyway i played the first 4 games and kicked ass so what did i do feeling great having not drunk for 8 days rewarded myself with four pints , i'd been really discplined before the match everyone had fish and chips and i had a horrible chicken sandwich on brown bread because of my cholestrol / pancretitis , and yet i really let myself down , ive been beating myself up ever since i feel very guilty i had a slight headache yesterday as i hadnt eaten much and the beer had gone to my head today im just feeling depressed as hell that i broke my promise to myself, i new all these matches would be in pubs and i told myself if i was gunna play in the team i was gunna do it sober i didnt even get past week one.
the crazy bit is i no how booze feeds my anxiety bigtime

[becky000]

Don't beat yourself up about it. We are all human and we all make mistakes - ALL the time! Just learn from your mistake and start again.

[Annie0904]

I agree with Becky, don't beat yourself up over it. You have set yourself a difficult challenge when the matches are all in pubs and your friends are all drinking. You did however do really well on the other days and you should be proud of yourself for that. The good thing is that you can see when you have made a mistake and are willing to try harder so just focus on those positives..you will get there! :)

[BobbyDog]

You were being so disciplined and that takes a lot of courage and will power, very well done. As others have pointed out, please don't beat yourself up over one small mistake. You obviously want to make the right decisions as far as your mental and physical health are concerned, but you are not a saint, only human. Look forward and not back.x