Is my Diazepam use OK?

[steveo]

Just wanted to check with you guys if my diazepam usage is OK and not going to cause too many problems in later weeks.

I won't bore people with my story again but here is my recent post about my current situation - http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=128264

Been prescribed 20mg Citalopram and 5mg and 2mg Diazepam.

Took 10mg Cit for a month and just recently upped it to 20mg. I've basically had a massive mental breakdown and developed severe agoraphobia. I've avoided taking Diazepam as I was scared to take it but since Monday, I haven't been able to take anxiety anymore so to help me get through the days I've started taking Diazepam.
Been crudely cutting my diazapams in half to take 1mg in the morning and 1mg in the evening. Been taking them before I'm having a panic attack as a precauionary measure to take the edge off my constant anxiety which I'm getting throughout the day.

Is this OK? How long will it take before I feel I need to take one purely because I know I only got through the day before by taking one?

I don't want to become reliant on them but I seriously need some rest from the terrible month and a half I've had!

[swgrl09]

I think that is ok. I too was given diazepam in 2 mg tablets when I started escitalopram. I use them as needed to sleep. If I am feeling anxiety before bed I will take one and in an hour I will feel better. I think at that low of a dose - 2 mg or 1 mg, as you are taking them, you don't need to worry.

[Vanilla Sky]

Its ok to take a low dose 2mg for short term use. I used them too in my first month of Citalopram.

[Kobey]

I take 6mg every now and then when I feel awful. I don't need it or rely on it. 2mg is an extremely low dose.

[clio51]

I too have 2mg, and take it when I'm anxious and feel it's not going down.was given dose of 3x2mg day from doc by only done this occasionally. So 1mg is hardly anything and may not be taking the edge of you really need. You will be fine on 2mg even twice day it will really help you in the beginning.

Have you gone to Cornwall with your dad?

[Charlie11]

Hi Stevo. I was given 2 x 5 mgs a day for 2 wks to help with side effects of Prozac and was told by my psych to take them even if I didn't feel anxious. Feel al to more positive now:)

[steveo]

Hi guys.

Yeah my dad drove me down here last night. I was very scared about the 4 hour car drive so I dosed myself up on 6mg diazapam. Felt very sleep for most of the journey and barely remember it to be honest because I didn't take my eyes of my laptop screen.

The agoraphobia is really starting to get to me now. Because of that I feel trapped in the house and that is making me more anxious. The citalopram dose has changed from 20mg to 30mg and I've just started on Pregabalin which is making me feel like im about 5 foot above Neptune.

This is the first day I haven't taken Diazapam in just over a week although I do feel rather nervous.

I feel that diazapam is only masking my symptoms for a bit (which is what it's designed to do).

I don't think I'm ready to cope without it at the moment. The change from Cardiff to Cornwall is still having an effect though.

Sorry to ramble on about my problems!!

[BridgetW]

I believe a such a low dose you will be fine. You are under a doctors care and keep your line of communication open with him/her. I too do not want to rely on taking a pill to get through my day. My therapist advised me that its not a bad thing, some people have to take certain medications in life. As long as they are taking correctly and talk to your doctor. I say enjoy your positive step in becoming less anxious.

Be Safe and Well
:D B

[clio51]

Hi Stevie

I know it's your home when you were younger, but do you feel comfortable there?
As are home is are safe place and your dad was thinking he was doing the right thing for you.

Don't worry about the diazepam, take it when you feel it's too much for you to cope with!

We you scared of being on your own(I presume you live in your own place) that's why you went home. There nothing wrong with this we all feel safe with somebody there they don't have to be in the same room or talking to us just the reassurances there,there.

Try taking tiny steps say just going to the back door, then down the garden.
Hope your feeling slightly better. Xx

[steveo]

I live with housemates in Cardiff. 2 good friends.

I seem to be the opposite to most people in here. I prefer being on my own. When the house is empty I am at my best. When it's full of people I panic.

Infact I literally just had a panic attack about 40 mins ago. Was sat quietly with my dad watching the TV and boom. Suddenly felt like I wasn't really there. Ran upstairs and gobbled up 5mg Diazapam. Took about 30 mins to kick in. No more panic.

But. My panic is also different. I don't get shortness of breath. I don't get tight chest, or fast heartbeat or shakey hands. It's extreme depersonalisation/derealisation and feelings of unreality. They suddenly strike and boom, I have to flee the situation.

This is the place I normally love most in the world. It's where I grew up, I love Cornwall as it's quiet and peaceful and I love being with my dad more than anyone in the world.

It seems I'm scared of people all of a sudden. I need to get to the root cause of this.

[Spammy505778]

I had your symptoms two years ago when I had a break down , I couldn't even get into a car , the plus side you will get through this and find yourself again :D

[Consider]

I had depersonalization disorder with anxiety for the longest time. It happened after a head injury. I was better health wise but my emotions weren't. Couldn't place why, but I was in panic mode 24/7 rushing to the doctor's office. I was diagnosed with MDD with GAD and DPD after being rushed to the hospital fearing I would hurt myself. I also was diagnosed with a B12 and potassium deficiency. I spent a week there, and it changed me. I was prescribed Paxil and Remeron, and within 2 months, I felt a lot better. The constant DPD was gone and it was such a relief to wake up not feeling unreal. Keep on going steveo, be brave, you WILL get better. I promise.

[steveo]

Thanks so much guys.

I'm three months into this horrible breakdown right now. The anxiety is lessening slightly but the depression is worse than ever. Very scared.

Thanks though guys.

[Consider]

Are you still taking Pregabalin? Anti-seizure drugs do have a chance to worsen your depression or make you depressed which can in turn worsen your anxiety. I was on Neurontin, another anti-seizure drug, and though it took care of the anxiety, it worsened the depression. Just wanted to give you a heads up.

[steveo]

No i stopped them a while back. I could only manage them for 2 weeks. They made my DP/DR much much worse. I felt so spaced out!

[Consider]

How are you steve? Feeling any better?

[steveo]

Getting there thanks. Feeling a bit perkier over the last few days. My girlfriend came down to visit me which really changed me around. The weather is getting nicer and the evenings lighter. I hope I really am on the tail end of everything that happened to me.

How are you?

[Consider]

Doing pretty good. I am on my 2nd week of feeling better. Paxil has really been working out for me. :)

[gregcool]

Steve Ypu have my complete understsnding mate with the DP AND DR..i suffered that in a bad way 25 years ago and couldnt leave my flat for weeks..everytime i opened my front door,it felt very noisey out side.i could hear EVERY SINGLE SOUND..but all at once very close to my face..everything seemed in only 2d ..kind of flat but in my face..it was horrible..ohh i dont know how i managed..this went on for weeks and in the end i had to get someone to perminantly live with me..this went on for more weeks..then one day for no reason..it just all was gone.!!!! Just like that..the ringing in my ears,my racing thoughts , depressing feelings,anxiety..ALL JUST GONE THE MOMENT I OPEND MY EYES..i felt so free and happy..i could think them all back if i tried..i was on no medication.....I opend my front door and everything was perfectly normal outside..all the sounds made sence and everything was 4d again..my DP AND DR..all gone..i was very silly after this..because it was taking lcd for a while that caused this one nigjt...but now because i was so so relieved and norm..i was my happy self again..as if id come out of locked in syndrom...i started smoking drugs again.then after a week of smoking,one morning i made another joint and smoked it as norm before i left my flat.
Then BANG !!!!!! I couldnt believe it..I was instantly back in that place again ..all just switched back on..instant..i was soooo soooo..regretfull ..this time i was worse and had to se phycietrist and doctors put me on heavy medication which made everything even worse...i was soo soo depressed and much worse...all this lasted 5 years before it all startd to subside...i eventuall got my life back.but still with a small form of agaraphobia..but not very bad ..i just couldnt go on planes..but that was it..i could do everything eles..hights bridges etc...i thought id never get this back into my life again...But 9 years ago my friend beat me up in front of my family and other people.then said to me '''''because of you im going to kill myself..he went straight upto hes flat..and hung himself...that was it for me...i suffered PDS and have done ever since..bringing back all those feelings i just told you about...i have suffered all this time..thats longer than before..and most people on hear know i strugled to find any help...so just want to say...it does and can just go overnight...or ware off in time..so thats what im waiting for..although this time it was brought on for me by a trumatic event..the first time by drugs...so our minds recover differently to the way they were hurt to start with....just wanted to share with you..good luck..

[steveo]

Thanks for sharing your story Greg.

I've never ever touched any street drug and I don't drink or smoke anything either so mine has never been triggered in that way.

Mine isn't always constant too. It comes and goes with anxiety as well as the more I'm thinking about it and the more I fear it.

Some days are fine, some days, like yesterday, were hellish. Constant crying and scared all day yesterday from it.

[Snoodlester]

Hi Steveo
I wanted to say well done for going down to Cornwall. I too have a driving/travelling anxiety, and the thoughts of this journey is daunting. However, since joining NMP I have been looking at CBT4PANIC and found it very useful - I'm sure you've already come across it though. My anxiety is anticipatory and catastrophizing for sure, and I've been able to use the CBT for my travelling to great effect, I just hope it helps me with my other fears.
When I had my second 'crisis' a week ago, the out of hours GP gave me 2mg of diazepam as I couldn't turn off my anxiety at all. He told me to take it 3 times a day and gave me enough for 2 days. It really helped - it's a mild sedative to help you relax. Sometimes I think you need this to switch off the adrenaline.
Sue x