Rennie1989
24-02-13, 10:52
Hiya guys
I often get one or two spells of depression a year but I can feel another episode coming. It was only two months ago since my last episode and I was off work for a week and a half and nearly hospitalised when I kind of went catatonic. It was really hard getting out of it and really hard staying away from another episode.
Recently I found out that my two month waiting list for 'high intense treatment' for severe anxiety and depression has increased BY FOUR MONTHS! I couldn't cope anymore and asked to have some help with medication. I was given Citalopram 10mg. I went on a high and loved it, but I've come down just as quick. It's been so hard with rent increase, crap weather, money problems and being forced to manage in my job that I'm really struggling to keep my head above water. I need to work to pay for everything, like my wedding coming up. I'm trying to find a new job but in this economy I'm can only thank that I have a job.
Everything keeps affecting me more than normal. My old friend won't talk to me anymore yet she'll talk to my best friend, work is making me knackered and I feel like I have no control, nothing makes me happy anymore and I really feel like giving up. Everyone expects me to be quiet about my illness and carry on like nothing's wrong but it's killing me inside. Why do people with back pain and diabetes get sympathy yet when I'm struggling with anxiety and depression I have to keep quiet and 'pull myself together'.
Sorry for the rant. I'm just so tired and really struggling. I hate feeling alone with no one to talk to (fiancé is ill with a fever and no one else really cares) and I can only be strong for so long before I break.
I often get one or two spells of depression a year but I can feel another episode coming. It was only two months ago since my last episode and I was off work for a week and a half and nearly hospitalised when I kind of went catatonic. It was really hard getting out of it and really hard staying away from another episode.
Recently I found out that my two month waiting list for 'high intense treatment' for severe anxiety and depression has increased BY FOUR MONTHS! I couldn't cope anymore and asked to have some help with medication. I was given Citalopram 10mg. I went on a high and loved it, but I've come down just as quick. It's been so hard with rent increase, crap weather, money problems and being forced to manage in my job that I'm really struggling to keep my head above water. I need to work to pay for everything, like my wedding coming up. I'm trying to find a new job but in this economy I'm can only thank that I have a job.
Everything keeps affecting me more than normal. My old friend won't talk to me anymore yet she'll talk to my best friend, work is making me knackered and I feel like I have no control, nothing makes me happy anymore and I really feel like giving up. Everyone expects me to be quiet about my illness and carry on like nothing's wrong but it's killing me inside. Why do people with back pain and diabetes get sympathy yet when I'm struggling with anxiety and depression I have to keep quiet and 'pull myself together'.
Sorry for the rant. I'm just so tired and really struggling. I hate feeling alone with no one to talk to (fiancé is ill with a fever and no one else really cares) and I can only be strong for so long before I break.