relapse/death

[cazzy]

Just getting over the withdrawal of diazepam and in middle of anxiety attacks and my Dad passes away in the same week ,.Omg ! i dont feel i can carry on , i hadnt spoken to him for 3-4 weeks , i had to give up caring for him 4 weeks ago . I found Dad had alot to do with how emotional and sad i was feeling , i was caring for him after he had heart attack and stroke , his behaviour become un acceptable , swearing at me, running me down and with his COPD his condition worstened and ended bed bound ...I feel so sick , going through this funeral thing is killing me , im having to empty his house and give it back to the council in 2 weeks and i aint buried him yet , we only so made ammends on Thursday when he was taken in for plurisy ,i stayed by his side , he was well alert and Happy but in pain . He took a turn for the worst 3 days later and fell unconcious in pain and passed away, The nurses were great they made it as easy and comfortable as possible for him. Im sick to my stomach how i went to see a doctor yesterday and told her im not coping , i need to blank this week out ,i told her i was suffering anxiety attacks prior to the week Dad died and now this has happened she was reluctant to give me anything and told me to contact crisis team, see my counciller in 3 days time . Altho she did give me 15 x2mg of diazepam , she seemed to fob me off , dont know wether its paranoia or she did have chip on her shoulder ..I feel i cant get on with life , flash backs are comming back , my dreadful past is haunting me and i feel i dont deserve a life , as im being tortured in the 1 im living in right now ....someone reasuure me please ....

[Daisy Sue]

Cazzy I am so sorry to hear your Dad has passed away. This kind of sadness and shock is hard enough to deal with on its own, but trying to cope with meds withdrawal and anxiety as well seems a massive thing for you to deal with.

Can you get any support with regard to funeral arrangements/house clearance etc.? Is there are relative you can ask to help you, or your local church??

It's going to be a rough few days either way, so just grit your teeth and do the best you can.. that's all anyone can do in such difficult circumstances.

[AuntieMoosie]

I'm so very sorry for your loss.

Just get every bit of help from anyone that you can to help take the strain off of you a bit hun.

I'd definitely contact the crisis team hun, they will be able to help you :)

Sending hugs :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[cazzy]

Thank you both ....how i managed to get through yesterday i dont know , but it helped phoning the crisis team and they so understanded and give me more helpful advice ,i didnt want them to feel sorry for me they was just i cant believe this is happened as the Tuesday i went to the Crisis Team as i couldnt feel i could cope with the Sunday . Sorry to rabbit on ,but i did get to see him and him see me . Anyway Crisis team told me to see another Gp as im still having the anxiety attacks and they can give me something for them and crisis team told me to tell the doctor to ring them , they were so supportive yesterday i felt ease ...i just need plucking up courage to go back to doctors but im afraid im going to be fobbed off with "Medication is not the answer to youre problems,breathing techniques etc are " im all full of anxiety wether to return to the doctors .... goodness i feel im talking,rabbiting on, confused sorry !!!!!