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Buby
17-06-04, 00:11
heya ppl,

at school yesterday it was really hot! like majorly hot! and cos im scatty and weird and proper hyper wen im happy, i go all out wen im wiv my mates. so at lunchtime i had a bottle of water and i sprayed sum at the lad in my yr, we get on really well, but he got the rite hump, he nearly spat on me...i dint mind much cos im so laid back, (i dont see the point of gettin angry wiv ya mates,,,,,,its a waste of ya life) neway, i gave him the bottle and he sprayed my and cos i wear white shirts...my top went see-thru lmao. but i dint mind tht much eeva......neway....today i was sittin on the bench and the bell went for us to go in to class agen...well wen this lad went past me, behind me, he put his tie round my neck and tightened it! at the time i wasnt scared, but now i think about it, it was like 'omg wot if he had kept it there, and strangled me?' this has got me thinking about dying and, i know this is makin all the feelings tht i ave worse....but u no wen u jst cant help thinkin negative thoughts? well this is my life....FULL OF BLOODY NEGATIVE EMOTIONS THT DONT EVEN NEED TO B WORRIED ABOUT! its jst so hard to concerntrate on others things, i even cried at school yesterday....( i aint cried in months) and im wondering if thts my problem.....mayb i need to cry... is my thoughts makin my life worse and du fink this will bring my pa's back agen? i no i shud tell the teacher bout this lad, but i really dont see the point. it was 1 fing....for now neway. ( i ave way too mnay problems, so i dont need this to get to me too, and avin to write down wot he dun and stuff.) i ave these thoughts b4 and i no they go in a week or so, but its jst so hard wen u think u cant chat to ne1 personally, u no?

newayz....dunno wot im gonna do now, well im gonna stop borin ya wiv me problems....hehe....hugs Rach xxxx


p.s. do u think tellin my mate to b careful, cos shes in trouble wiv anuva mate, was a gd idea? cos i did tell her and this mate told me to b quiet bout it, but now shes nos i told my mate to b careful...and now im in trouble wiv her [xx(] oopsy..was this a gd idea? cos this gurl is quite hard....

andrew
17-06-04, 23:45
hi rach, as well as cry maybe you need to share your thoughts and feelings more often so you can maintain your well being. alot of people need to share to keep themselves sane, you need to find ways and means to keep yourself in balance.
dont let anybody put anything around your neck ok, if you dont wanna tell school then dont, but if it happens again tell someone in your family or batter him lol.
and try and post higher up the board under anxiety, i think you will get more responses ok.
catch you soon, you take care hun

Buby
18-06-04, 00:39
fank coo hunni, im alwyz writin in my diary and stuff, but tht dont work, i nearly cried earlier cos, i answered back to me mum. ive neva done tht b4. and i was so ashamed but if felt gd for a lil while. i think i need to cry agen hehe. ill prob cry myself to sleep tonite or summit.

take care hunni xx mwah xxxxx Rach x

andrew
18-06-04, 14:48
keep writing that diary, it is most prob helping - its just your struggling alot at mo. im off line till mon so wont reply but im sure others will so keep on posting or go chat ok. you take care hun andrew