blondinou
02-03-13, 23:06
I just went out to the pub for two friends' birthdays and was with my boyfriend. Started feeling panicky before we left the house, about feelings of pressure on my chest. Tried to get on with my night out anyway, tried really hard. Really wanted to have a good night with my friends, I don't go out that much. But in the pub I kept getting waves of panic and I must have come across rude because I could barely hold a conversation with people due to my mind being filled with panicky feelings. I kept wanting to get out of the pub. I had to leave and come home. I've left my friends and my boyfriend in the pub and feel sad and disappointed and annoyed with myself.
I feel like I've got worse again recently... Keep checking my fingernails and lips to make sure they're not blue from lack of oxygen, and keep checking my pulse rate, and feeling like my breathing is going funny. I try to pretend it's not happening and usually succeed in getting on with my day, but I can't deny it, recently I've been feeling panicky more often. It just sort of creeps up and then like today you get a bigger panic attack that's hard to control.
Does this happen to anybody else? Periods of days or even months where you feel fairly normal so you don't really work too much on sorting your bad thoughts out, you just push it under the carpet because it's small enough to do so. But then it creeps in slowly or takes you with a big nasty surprise and then you feel like you've failed again and feel like you should try harder to control it. I shouldn't monitor the length time I've had anxiety/panic but I do - it's been 2 years since my first panic attacks and the longer I live with it the more worried I get that I'll have GAD and panic attacks for life and they'll become an inevitable part of my future. Please tell me that other people out there feel the same and what you try to do about it.
I feel like I've got worse again recently... Keep checking my fingernails and lips to make sure they're not blue from lack of oxygen, and keep checking my pulse rate, and feeling like my breathing is going funny. I try to pretend it's not happening and usually succeed in getting on with my day, but I can't deny it, recently I've been feeling panicky more often. It just sort of creeps up and then like today you get a bigger panic attack that's hard to control.
Does this happen to anybody else? Periods of days or even months where you feel fairly normal so you don't really work too much on sorting your bad thoughts out, you just push it under the carpet because it's small enough to do so. But then it creeps in slowly or takes you with a big nasty surprise and then you feel like you've failed again and feel like you should try harder to control it. I shouldn't monitor the length time I've had anxiety/panic but I do - it's been 2 years since my first panic attacks and the longer I live with it the more worried I get that I'll have GAD and panic attacks for life and they'll become an inevitable part of my future. Please tell me that other people out there feel the same and what you try to do about it.