Ktmx
05-03-13, 02:53
Hi everyone. If anyone has read any of my other posts they will know I suffer quite bad panic attacks and GAD.
Last year I moved to a flat and ended up leaving due to being obsessed it was cold and therefore haunted as nobody else felt it. Taking myself out of the situation made it better but I understand I ran away from the fear instead of facing it which is the only reason it got better.
Not long after my mum took ill and nearly died, I fell pregnant with the coil and miscarried and then my relationship ended. It didn't end on good terms and I've suffered a lot of trouble from my ex.
I'm finding my whole life from then is anxiety every day. I worry about everything, everything frightens me, I'm taking bad panic attacks and I mean everything and several times a day.
Late last year I got myself a flat for myself and my little one. It wasn't going to be ready til start of march and I got keys just last week. I have already started obsessing that I'm going to feel how I did in last flat, and worried its gonna be cold/ what if its haunted, what if I don't settle there etc. this is getting me so wound up. I've had the keys two days and already have been obsessing about it being cold/ the place going on fire and that I won't like living there.
I have felt safe at my parents for the last few months but sharing a room with my 3 yr old so can't go on. I am still at my mums just now.
Tonight my 3 yr old woke me up wanting to get in my bed, I got a fright and when she was climbing in the bed I'm sure I heard a noise like someone unzipping something. From that I freaked out it must be a ghost. I know I was half asleep and I currently have a flu virus and was burning up before I woke up so could all just be me being mixed up but from that I started panicking that the haunting thing was gonna happen again and I'm not gonna be able to stay in my new flat and I've wasted all that money and I'll never be able to be happy there or move out and be happy. This let to me freaking out about being possessed and lots of horrible thoughts came into my head mostly about hurting myself. Then I got scared I was gonna hurt my daughter although I never would and because I wasn't getting as upset as I think I should I'm now freaking that its not anxiety and I just want to hurt myself etc. I know it's a vicious circle and in my head but I can't help but believe it all because I'm scared if I don't ill prove my doubts right. I can't sleep and I feel awful I dunno how to go on like this.
Last year I moved to a flat and ended up leaving due to being obsessed it was cold and therefore haunted as nobody else felt it. Taking myself out of the situation made it better but I understand I ran away from the fear instead of facing it which is the only reason it got better.
Not long after my mum took ill and nearly died, I fell pregnant with the coil and miscarried and then my relationship ended. It didn't end on good terms and I've suffered a lot of trouble from my ex.
I'm finding my whole life from then is anxiety every day. I worry about everything, everything frightens me, I'm taking bad panic attacks and I mean everything and several times a day.
Late last year I got myself a flat for myself and my little one. It wasn't going to be ready til start of march and I got keys just last week. I have already started obsessing that I'm going to feel how I did in last flat, and worried its gonna be cold/ what if its haunted, what if I don't settle there etc. this is getting me so wound up. I've had the keys two days and already have been obsessing about it being cold/ the place going on fire and that I won't like living there.
I have felt safe at my parents for the last few months but sharing a room with my 3 yr old so can't go on. I am still at my mums just now.
Tonight my 3 yr old woke me up wanting to get in my bed, I got a fright and when she was climbing in the bed I'm sure I heard a noise like someone unzipping something. From that I freaked out it must be a ghost. I know I was half asleep and I currently have a flu virus and was burning up before I woke up so could all just be me being mixed up but from that I started panicking that the haunting thing was gonna happen again and I'm not gonna be able to stay in my new flat and I've wasted all that money and I'll never be able to be happy there or move out and be happy. This let to me freaking out about being possessed and lots of horrible thoughts came into my head mostly about hurting myself. Then I got scared I was gonna hurt my daughter although I never would and because I wasn't getting as upset as I think I should I'm now freaking that its not anxiety and I just want to hurt myself etc. I know it's a vicious circle and in my head but I can't help but believe it all because I'm scared if I don't ill prove my doubts right. I can't sleep and I feel awful I dunno how to go on like this.