wedding

[maximus1975]

just returned from the drop in centre quite busy in there today, i found it rather boring which shows just relaxed i was , the general chat was pretty dull alot to do with benefits at least the man that scared the hell out of me wasnt there so my anxiety levels werent to bad,
i have a wedding to go to tomoorrow originally i wasnt gunna go at all but now im thinking of just going to the church the anxious thoughts are though what if i have attack in front of120 people,
im def not going meal or evening do these guys are bug dribkers

[Annie0904]

Max I am pleased you felt relaxed today and good on you for deciding to go to the wedding. Try to sit near the back at the end so you can get out easily if you need to (I am sure you won't need to though :) ).

[BobbyDog]

I am sure you will be fine Max, you seem to know your limitations now. At least if you go to the church no one can complain.x

[kittikat]

Well done for today Max :yesyes: and I think Annie's advice about the wedding is spot on. I always sit near an exit so that I can make a quick get away if needed.

You are making brilliant progress...don't let this consume your thoughts and get you down ok. You can do it!! Kitti :)

[theharvestmouse]

bug drinkers? I don't blame you for not going.:)

[Col]

Fantastic max, yes I remember when you got the invite a few months ago and you were extreamly anxious!

Have a lovely day X

[Bekzie]

I hope you have a nice day

[maximus1975]

do i or dont i go that is the question ??

[kittikat]

How do you feel today Max?

Feeling ok...take a chance, I'm sure it will do you good and another step in the right direction. If you really can't, don't see it as failure, these things happen. You are still recovering. Baby steps ok. Go with your gut instinct.

Take care. Kitti :) xx

[maximus1975]

i feel ok nervous though imagining the worst u no how it is , picturing myself running out the church with everyone saying he's lost it

[Col]

Max I am pleased you felt relaxed today and good on you for deciding to go to the wedding. Try to sit near the back at the end so you can get out easily if you need to (I am sure you won't need to though :) ).

Annie's seating advice is great! I'd get dressed - see how u feel, if u feel ok then...... I'd get in car/cab - see how I feel and just take it literally - 1 step at a time.:winks:

[maximus1975]

dear me i just cant win i have mixed emotions about todays wedding i got through the service ok nervous but ok, i was with 15 or so of my very best mates, they started talking about the meal in the afternoon they couldnt believe it when i said im not invited!!! ive been mates with the groom for years and although ive not seen him as much as use to as i dont go in the local we are still good mates, this left me feeling really down coz i no having done the church i could have done the meal , im invited to the evening dou but everyone will of had a skinfull by then and its just not same as i dont drink causes my anxiety, there were loads of people there from up country who i go back years with as they holiday down hear every year, i barely got chance to speak to any of them such a shame, every wedding i've ever been to if u get invited to the church you go to the meal.
the worst bit was getting droped of and seeing all my mates heading of to the hotel,
i wouldnt feel so bad if a few had invites like mine but everyone i spoke to outside asked what i was having to eat i feel gutted and flat, i would have been better of not being invited to the church so hear i am sat here thinking what a great evening there all having

[Annie0904]

Max you did so well getting to the church and I am sorry you were so let down by not being invited to the reception. Be proud of yourself for getting through the service though. :hugs::hugs:

[maximus1975]

that doesnt matter to me at one bit im sat here feeling lonely as hell . its just another indication that im longer the person i was , they will all be in there now having a great time im so pissed of its unreal, i no some of my mates felt well sorry for me, i could see it in there faces , dont think i'll ever look at him in the same way again:weep::weep:

[Annie0904]

Max I can understand how you must be feeling rejected right now but it looks like your other mates were not too happy about it either. Don't let this one incident pull you back. Sending you hugs :hugs::hugs:

[maximus1975]

just had a txt grom one of the lads saying all my mates are asking where i am , i dont feel motivated to go in there plus £ 30 taxi there and back , he said they want the old me back yeh im a great laugh after a few beers but they dont see the panic/anxiety the next day .
ive been doing really well lately but everyweek something kicks me in the balls .
my self esteem has been shattered , why cant i just be normal have a few beers like everyone else and wake up and be able to leave my house ,ive generally feel totally fed up

[BobbyDog]

I know how bad you feel and I really do feel for you too. What you have done has taken so much mental strength it is unbelievable! I can imagine how you feel, I have been the one left at home many times. You must be so strong willed Max. Your family will be so proud of you and the ones closest are the ones that really matter. You will see that when you look back on this day.

[theharvestmouse]

Max don't feel like that, it takes courage to not drink and give in to what other people do. And don't fool yourself into thinking that those who have a skinful wake up early the next day feeling great, because they don't, they may be able to function a bit better than someone with anxiety but there are long term health implications anyway.

I am like you in that I can no longer drink because the next day I am a complete wreck unable to do anything. We are different people sober and there's nothing wrong with that.

[jackie13]

Hi hun

I think you have done brilliantly don't get sucked into the drinking thingy:) you can wake up and not suffer the awful hangover feeling, your friends might seem fine the next day but it's unlikely. Why not tell them about your anxiety through alcohol?

You know that I am an alcoholic well on Thursday I buried my best friend and sought refuge in 1.5 bottles of red wine been suffering terribly since, it's just not worth it.

Jackie xx

[jayjoe18]

Hi Max, congrats on making the wedding! The church for me would of been the worst as it's very informal! I know first hand how socially difficult weddings can be, just a thought though, does the groom know about your anxiety etc? Could this be why he didn't invite you for the whole day, meal etc?

[maximus1975]

no hun he doesnt no about my anxiety i heard there were alot of people at the evening dou that didnt go to the church , i just wished i had an evening only invite then i wouldnt of been sat there with all my friends