Just put myself into one of my worst panic attacks! Advice?

[Anxiety Jim]

Hi,

Has anyone got any advice of how to calm down? I can barely breathe, I'm sure i'll pass out any minute.

I've just been doing the most stupid thing I could, I was googling to try to put my mind at rest. It's done the complete opposite.

I've got an itchy mole / freckle that I've got an appointment about with a dermatologist on 11 April. But the last 3 or 4 days it's been painful too, all around the mole and right into what feels like my bone.

Trying to put my mind at rest I googled melanoma and bone pain, I was thinking 'you don't get pain with cancer, I should be fine'.

But then I found this, (If you have melanoma that has spread to the bone, you probably have pain.)

and I'm now in one of the worst panic attacks I've ever had, I don't know what to do. My first instinct was A+E but wouldn't know what to tell them. I'm so scared right now, I can't seem to calm myself down AT ALL! I'm sure it's spread and I don't have long left :-(

[Bekzie]

Keep calm you will be fine, it could be any number of things that are nowhere near as bad as you are thinking. You will see the doctor in April and that will be fine. All of us HA sufferers think the absolute worst of everything, its just the way we are. Take some deep breaths and try to relax. STOP GOOGLING! I am only just learning that myself its the worst thing you can do :hugs:

[Annie0904]

Your own doctor has already seen your mole and thinks it looks fine. If he didn't he would have sent you to the hospital much quicker. I am sure he has only referred you to reassure you about it. Deep breaths in, hold it and slowly let it out and like Bekzie has said STOP GOOGLING! you will come up with worst case scenarios when it is probably a harmless mole. Mine was itching a lot but it is fine.

[Anxiety Jim]

Thank you both,

I seem to be a little calmer since writing my first post, but my breathing is still not right. I'm getting cold and hot flushes through my whole body too.

Annie, I know I should take some comfort in what my GP said about it probably being OK, but I am in the highest risk category too (red hair, pale skin, burn easily and a lot).

Now I've been thinking about it I've had this bone pain before, about a month ago but it only lasted a day or two, i assumed I must have hit my arm on something, although there was never a bruise.

The thing that keeps going through my head is that every second I'm sat at home is a second more the cancer is spreading.

I've been trying to take my mind of it with a book, I've read a page 3 times now and don't know what it said. I can't concentrate on anything. I tried going to bed too, but panicked with the covers covering me and had to get out. I'm a mess right now.

I think it's my first panic attack of the year, I thought I was long past having them :-(

[Lilharry]

I think just remember the more you focus on something the more pain you will feel, especially if you're pushing and prodding it. It's a really typical thing for people wiht health anxiety to actually make their symptoms worse by focussing on them and checking them all the time. It sounds to me like the mole is inflamed and that could account for the bone pain - inflammation pushing on the bone. I"m sure I've had something like this before after knocking a mole and it eventually went away by itself.

[Anxiety Jim]

I know concentrating on the pain isn't a good thing, but I have had the pain for 4 days, and only related it to the mole yesterday, so I don't think it's psychological.

I've also linked the mole / melanoma, to my headaches I've been getting for 3 weeks, and to my liver ultrasound that showed "fatty changes" but now I'm thinking those changes in my liver could be the cancer that has spread.

I've got an appointment with a GP on Tuesday, but I'm not sure what I can say to him, I've already been referred to a specialist after all.

[unsure_about_this]

Hi

Please try and not to google your symptoms (or use similar websites). I know it hard since I been guilty of doing it in the past. It is good that you got an appointment on Tuesday with a GP even though you been referred to a specialist about your mole.
If you find it easier write it down when you go on Tuesday.

[almamatters]

Hi Jim
As you know googling is the worst thing you can do, google is always wrong with it's diagnoses anyway.
Please feel reassured that your GP has seen the mole, GP's know what they are looking for with these things and will not take chances if they think something is sinister.
Go through your concerns with your GP on Tuesday, even though you have been referred onto a specialist , your doctor can help to put your mind at rest. Take Care

[Anxiety Jim]

Thanks everyone.

I know I should avoid google, and I've been mostly good at it. But I managed to convince myself that I would find reassurance, thinking my symptoms wouldn't be able to be related to melanoma.

A fear of mine is that because I'm obese, the cancer has been spreading a long time as it makes it way through the fat to the surface. :-(

My GP told me once last year that he was concerned by how often I was going in to see them. So I'm worried they're going to start dismissing things that I go to them with.

[Lilharry]

I link my symptoms like you do too, but the only people who are truly qualified to do that are doctors. The fact that your doctor hasn't linked it, but you have goes to show that you are probably wrong. Your liver and your mole are in no way connected and the way you're describing your imagined cancer and obesity just sounds plain wrong. Please trust that your doctor understands how these diseases work and if there was anything to worry about they would investigate.