Really feel bad atm

[dooop]

I am 27 years old and have always really struggled to gain any direction in my life.

For years I've felt as if I have had to avoid social interaction because I feel stressed all the time. This has meant that I don't have anybody that I could genuinely call a friend (sounds amazingly pathetic to write that :shades:).

I still live with parents and have worked random low paid jobs with larger periods of unemployment throughout. My latest job finishes at the end of this month and it begins to hit me that I've got to do things all over again. Find a new job, then if I do get a new one to start again with new people and the cycle of always being tired then has a knock on effect on everything else for me. It's like I have to use so much energy being my awkward self that I need a weekend on my own to recharge. Never mind the problems I have sleeping in the week. I've had to cancel courses in the past because I've been so tired after not being able to sleep at all. Once drove twice without a nights sleep to go to appointments before I eventually quit the course.

I'm just really lost :wacko:

I've done CBT, done antidepressants and don't think either have had any impact. Seem to have to create my own distractions to get through days on my own. Watching TV, using twitter and watching sport just so I don't think about things. Like thinking too much about my life will end in something bad :doh:

I'm not sure this is making any sense :doh: Maybe this is just life but it's so grim. They tell you to get a job and that will help. Then it's get a girlfriend/wife. Doubt thats gonna happen but even if that miracle occured I don't feel like it's going to change me.

[BobbyDog]

Whey you had CBT did you focus on your Social Anxiety at all? The only way to really make friends is by going out, no matter how difficult that is or how uncomfortable and stressed that would make you feel. You will feel very anxious at first but that would get better in time.

Why not join a meet up in your area if there is one, or start one through NMP on their meet ups thread. You could also post on here for a pen pal.

If full time work makes you too anxious, why not try working part time for a while, or sign up with an employment agency, they could help you find work more suited to your needs.

[Lilharry]

It sounds to me like you have low self esteem. What about trying something that kick starts you into a different way of thinking? We have courses here called Outward Bound that are supposed to be really good for self esteem and getting to think differently about your life. They are outdoor courses that take you out of your comfort zone but at the same time build you up. Do you think you could give somethign like that a go? Or what about just doing something crazy like sky diving?

The other thing that I've found that's really helped me is to accept that I am an introvert and make peace with that. I'm no longer worried about the fact that I don't make friends easily and that I feel awkward in group situations - that's just part of my character and too bad what anyone else thinks. It is important to have friends that you can talk to and who can support you though. There are lots of community groups that you could join that are really non-threatening and full of nice people. I find that community gardens are a really great place to just hang out and be yourself and not worry what other people think. What kinds of things are you into that make you happy? It's really important to nurture those things.

[Col]

I am 27 years old and have always really struggled to gain any direction in my life.

For years I've felt as if I have had to avoid social interaction because I feel stressed all the time. This has meant that I don't have anybody that I could genuinely call a friend (sounds amazingly pathetic to write that :shades:).

I still live with parents and have worked random low paid jobs with larger periods of unemployment throughout. My latest job finishes at the end of this month and it begins to hit me that I've got to do things all over again. Find a new job, then if I do get a new one to start again with new people and the cycle of always being tired then has a knock on effect on everything else for me. It's like I have to use so much energy being my awkward self that I need a weekend on my own to recharge. Never mind the problems I have sleeping in the week. I've had to cancel courses in the past because I've been so tired after not being able to sleep at all. Once drove twice without a nights sleep to go to appointments before I eventually quit the course.

I'm just really lost :wacko:

I've done CBT, done antidepressants and don't think either have had any impact. Seem to have to create my own distractions to get through days on my own. Watching TV, using twitter and watching sport just so I don't think about things. Like thinking too much about my life will end in something bad :doh:

I'm not sure this is making any sense :doh: Maybe this is just life but it's so grim. They tell you to get a job and that will help. Then it's get a girlfriend/wife. Doubt thats gonna happen but even if that miracle occured I don't feel like it's going to change me.


No - this is making perfect sense to me and I'm sure it will strike a chord with many NMP sufferers!

Genuinely call a friend - amazingly pathetic - NO NO NO NOT AT ALL!!!!!!!!
it's bloody hard having anxiety and panic attacks, it's hard to be your own friend let alone have friends! I'm very chatty and attract people because of it, I've always been like this BUT even me since I became a GAD sufferer prefer to not socialise, I'm like a hermit in ways.


Please don't be to hard on yourself & that's what's soo good about this site,
You'll meet like minded people/friends on here , all ages, from all walks of life:winks:

[theharvestmouse]

I understand how it is, I went from having loads of friends to barely any. I get what you're saying about thinking too much may have bad consequences, I find the same thing. It's often when I am on my own of an evening with time on my hands that I can sometimes start thinking and it quickly can make you feel very hopeless.

Maybe you should give CBT another chance or look at alternative medication? As for meeting people, you could try searching for local groups of whatever thing you are interested in.

Just as things can change for the worse they can also change for the better, but it may take a kick start from one thing to start the ball rolling.