I hate death.

[j2]

I know it goes without saying but I have HA and have had it a long time. I am a mess right now because I have to have my dog put to sleep. I am not particularly attached to this dog but my kids are. The dog is 14 and very ill but the fact that I have to think about the death of this dog is bringing all of my fears to front of my mind. I am an emotional wreck right now and feel like I am going to jump out of my skin, break down and weep, pass out or all of the above. All this over a dog, I am such a coward and weak. I am a grown man who should be able to handle this. Sorry for the rant and I hope I have no offended anyone but I feel worthless right now.

Thanks for listening.

J2

[RVP]

It's normal, when our rabbit died I cried for about 5 minutes and I wasn't attached to the rabbit, and a rabbit doesn't hold the same value as a dog (in some cases lol) and this was before I had HA. Don't be afraid to have a little cry, it's not weak. I find it realeses a lot of pressure and stress.

[steveo]

I feel upset just hearing that your dog has to be put down. It's ok to feel emotional when an animal dies. I miss all of the pets I've ever had, (apart from my Sea Monkeys).

Allow yourself some time, maybe when you're on your own for 20 minutes, to allow yourself to get emotional. If you can, cry. It's a great release! Trust me, I'm a 28 year old guy and I've spent the last 3 months doing it!!

Don't ever try to contain emotions. Give yourself time for them, whether your a 6ft 6, tough muscle man, or a 5 year old girl, we are all humans and ALL feel the same range of emotions.

[meche]

Hi J2,

I'm so sorry to hear about your dog. Personally, you haven't offended me but I have to agree and disagree with you in certain areas.

Firstly, I completely understand why this would bring fears to the front of your mind. Death is something we never want to think about and for those of us with HA - well, it's like a bull to a red rag! Unfortunately it's part of every day life (humans, animals) and there is no escape from it. It makes us question our own mortality and the how's and where's! Although my HA is lying low at the moment, death is still an issue I find very hard to confront so please don't be so harsh on yourself.

Secondly; all this over a dog? As an animal lover this is a situation I have been in many times with cats and dogs and I'm not ashamed to say that as a grown woman of 39, a little piece of me dies each time I have to make that heartbreaking decision. I am neither weak or cowardly - just human!

Your kids are very attached to this dog and will be heartbroken. I understand that this has triggered your HA but for now just be there for them and give them huge hugs. xx

[j2]

Thanks for the support. I still feel worthless but at least I know you guys understand. HA has just beat me down for so long and to such depths that I don't remember normal. Thanks for listening.

[panickyme]

I'm sorry you are not feeling well right now, you will find the strength to get by for your children. I also suffer from HA and death just freaks me out. I know we all have to go, but just the thought of it sends me panicking. With that being said I had to put my dog to sleep last year, and just the thought of me ultimately deciding my dogs fate, upset me so much, who was I to make this decision (even know it had to be done, she was suffering) I had such a hard time with this, because I was turning the tables, and putting me in the dogs position, and going about it all wrong.(we identify with the dog) hope this makes sense. Major negative thinking, think positive time will heal the broken hearts, just love them. I hope everything goes well and you find the strength to get through this sad time. :hugs:

[kerri]

Hi, last week our cat died, it was unexpected but she was about 10. I understand how you are feeling as I was the same. Slowly coming to terms with it but I am still overcome with negative feelings and wonder what the point is.

[j2]

I hear you Kerri, I have so much and yet I wonder "what the point is too"