Concerned mother

[Mudge of legend]

Hi All

New to posting on forums.. please bear with me. I am a mother of a depressive 19yr old with social anxiety and self harming issues. I can have bouts of panic ans anxiety myself and Im finding it hard to cope/help her at the moment.
I am hoping that I can get support and 'clues' for you lovely people so I can help her better than I am and feel better in myself too. Heres hoping ... x

[PanchoGoz]

Hi Mudge :)
I'm an 18 year old girl so I can kind of identify with her. Is she getting any help for her issues?

[Mudge of legend]

Yes, she's starting to. She has had one appointment with a therapist and is due for another after a month!. it felt like they had dropped her... but at least she can talk to someone other than me.
thanks for asking by the way.

[PanchoGoz]

At least that is something although it seems very few and far between. If I were her I would want to know that you were there for me if I needed you and if you didn't do anything else I would still be very comforted by that :) cook her a good few meals too, she'll miss them when she's gone, I'm at uni and the cooked meals are the best when I get home in the holidays :D is she still in education at all?

[Mudge of legend]

no. she had to give up her job because of bullying which made her harm terribly.. it then has spiralled into social anxiety and depression.. she's in her room most of the time.
Her self esteem, confidence and self love have all gone at the moment.. she cant remember a time when she was okay she says. The therapist mentioned that it was her dad who made her like this from when we divorced years ago.. so now she thinks she will always be this bad. I am there for her always... its hard

[PanchoGoz]

I'm sorry to hear things are so bad for her. I hope she can find herself again soon. Maybe it would help to encourage her to get out a bit more? Just for the odd walk and such.

[nd267]

I'm a 19 year old girl, and I can honestly say that going to the doctors about it was the best thing I ever did.
I would talk to my mum about the panic and anxiety i was suffering (which i understand isnt the same as depression) but, i found it really hard to actually talk to her about everything that was bothering me- at the end of the day she was my mum, and i could see how upset it was making her- which was not my intention at all!
Talking to a doctor or therapist will really help her- being able to talk to someone completely mutual is such a help, as theres no emotions getting in the way!
Hope this site helps and comforts you; its helped me a great deal just talking to like minded people, who actually understand what youre going through! :)

[Mudge of legend]

Bless you both nd and Pancho.. thats exactly why I wanted to come on here again. It took me nearly a yearto get her to go to the docs.. and the doc was horrid to her! typical huh? now i have to go with her every time so the doc takes her seriously... doc didnt even want to check out her harming wounds or even see them. surely that would have shown the doc the state my daughter was in?
ahh well we're over that bit now but i know what you mean about talking to someone else.. she can moan about me too.. she knows i get upset
thanks again.. and bless you