do i have ocd?? please help

[xxemmziexx]

i know everyones sick of these messages but does anyone have an opinion?

im really fussy with what i eat with. i have to eat with a fork and spoon with flowers on and if i cant find that fork or spoon i dont eat.

i wear my earphones and u know they have a "L" for left and a "R" for right on each of the earphones i put them in my ear then take them out to make sure i have them in the right ears i keep having to check to make sure.

when i was yonger i ued to have my door ajar and i was lying in bed i looked to make sure me door was still ajar and when i looked i had to count to 3 and then breathe.

i cant do anything without someone with me

and if i dont like soemthing ill re-arange it

if anything is on the floor and i can see it in my eyeline ill move it.

i hate dirt and cant touch anything dirty without gloves then i was my ahnds after. if i have to handle my brothers clothes i pick it up with two fingers then run to wash my hands afer.

i hung the washing out the other day and each piece of clothing i hung out had to ahve the same colour pegs on and i spent ages looking for the same colour pegs..

when i was in primary school i got my ears pierced. but i wasnt sure my earings were still in, so like every 5 mins or so i used to touch my earing count to 3 then breathe like i used to do with my door.

what i usualy do now is that if there is something in my eyeline i dont like ill move it, and keep moving it till i cant see it.

i keep licking my thumb after every sentance i type
ive ordered my deodrant bottles and my body sprays from smallest to largets on my dressing table.

i constantly check for spiders and i know there isnt any there but is till double check over again, then when ive looked i breathe so i know ive done it right.

it takes my ages to turn my phone off cause i think i havnt done it right the first time.




(8) When you look you see right through me, cut the rope fell to me knees, fallen broken every single time (8)

[belly]

Hi,im not a doctor,but it does sound like ocd to me.I have some similar symptoms,i count things,always three of something,i obsess about what jewellery to wear,and change my mind several times a day,and take things off and put others on etc.I have a compusive shopping thing too.So u are not alone! I think whats important is if ur symptoms are affecting your everyday life,and making it a misery,which it sound like they are.Ive heard that cbt is good for ocd problems,im looking ionto it myself.Ive done stuff like ive said for years,i just got used to doing it.But i think if its stopping u enjoying life,i would get some help.You are not a pain!

[scoobygirl2005]

Hi.

Welcome to the forum. That definitely sounds like ocd to me, I have some of the symptoms you describe too. Have you talked to a doctor about this?

Scooby2005
x x

[mum2four]

Hello I totally get the fork and spoon thing except my issues before my meds was needing to have green handled cutlery if thay did not have the green the handle I had to go find a green a handle if my kids had the only green handle one I would have to ask for it in the end my kids knew the green ones were mine after going on meds thay were still giving me the greens ones but I dont care so much any more and it feels good now.

I still cant use the clothe line to dry my clothes yet my washing mashine is brocken and its also my dry (washer/dryer combo unit) we have orderd a new one but I cant bare to use the clothe line yet I have my clothes hanging in side and if anyone trys to convince me that using the clothes line is best I can feel the anxiety building in side me and I debate with the person to some degree before my meds I would have had a full on debate and gotten extreamly upset and stormed off in anyone had attempted to convince me to use my clothes line. I'm still not sure why it bugs me so much but I after putting on my air dry shirt the other morning for the first time in a long time I stood still feeling like I wanted to tear it off and throw it across the room. I ended up laying on the bed arms beside me rocking trying to ignore the feeling that it was giving me. I think it the fear of getting them dirty out side that in the wind and rain that bothers me so much so for now I will stick to air dry them in front of my heater in my room that seems to be hard enough to deal with first.

I use to wear rings till I began have a reaction to them and when I wear rings I'm contantly touching them and keeping the finger thay are on curled up so the rings cant fall off evan after touching them a fue times I had to look a fue times as well. I check on my neclace heaps as well the all ways looking for the join and it I cant find it I can feel the anxiety build till I find it and it has to be at the back of my neck if it's not I have to fix it up and make it right again. if it get stuck on the pendant I have to take the neck lace off and fix it up before putting it back on and makeing it even.

Sound a lot like OCD but the biggest guestion is do you fear anything happening if you dont do what you do the way you do it. For me I have come to relise that I fear that if things are not done the way it feel just right at the time then I get intence images of bad things like the necklace chocking me if it not straight or the ending up in court and then jail then insane or worse because I wrecked my clothes by using the clothes line and had to bye to many new one and went bankrupt ect. The cutlery issues was a fear of hurting my kids and I get intence images of some how hurting them.I really didn't know I was not meant to have these images till I went on my meds I have had them since I was kid I thought every one got them and use to wonder how other people coped with them and why I just didn't cope with them at all. Some people with OCD just get thoughts of bad things happening but if you dont have a fear then you may just be OCPD which is different to OCD in many ways and usally dosn't interfear to great with daily life.

[Lynnann]

I have to agree with Scooby a visit to GP would be the next step. You have taken the first by writing your post, well done!!I takes a lot of courage to look at ourselves and reach out for help!! you will find a lot of support on this site!! Thinking of you!!

hugs to you

lynnann

[xxemmziexx]

thanks,

i would go and see a doctor but i cant im way to shy. i dont want to tell my parents cause im worried they wont believe me, or just think im mad. i really very shy and find it hard to do things on my own. its really hard for me. i know i sound really selfish.



(8) When you look you see right through me, cut the rope fell to me knees, fallen broken every single time (8)

[Lynnann]

Hi Again,

You do not sound selfish,just shy!! Do you think you could write your symptoms down and show your GP! I am sure that if you could it would help to get it off your chest!! Don't think that the GP will think you are mad for doing it!! It would not be the first time someone who is shy has come to them with a problem!! Maybe you could print your post!!

I am sure your GP will understand.

sending Hugs to you!!!

Lynnann

[xxemmziexx]

i could try that. but what if i dont have ocd. what if its just me being really fussy. then id look really stupid and id have had wasted their time. ive been writning a diary for a week with the stuff i do in it.
x

(8) When you look you see right through me, cut the rope fell to me knees, fallen broken every single time (8)

[Lynnann]

Hi,

The diary is a good idea,

This worries you and you need to have a proper assessment!!
So there are two possible outcomes,

1, you don't have it, so that will put your mind at rest!!

2, You do have it and you can start recieving treatment

So how could that waste time?

Hugs to you

Lynnann

[xxemmziexx]

thats true, i just worry way too much. i nearly couldnt eat dinner today, cause i had to make mine and i tohught all the plates was dirty. so i ate out of a bowl that i was happy with.

xx ems xx

(8) When you look you see right through me, cut the rope fell to me knees, fallen broken every single time (8)

[Lynnann]

Hi,

You have to do what makes you comfortable until you get the help that you need!!

You found a way to eat , So you won't starve, Well done

Hugs to you

Lynnann

[xxemmziexx]

thank you so much with the help you and other people have gave me on this forum, ive joined at least 4 forums and this is the best one for help by far. xx ems xx

(8) When you look you see right through me, cut the rope fell to me knees, fallen broken every single time (8)

[xxemmziexx]

i will try and so something, im just scared thats all, im not sure if i will be able to do it but i will try. xx

(8) When you look you see right through me, cut the rope fell to me knees, fallen broken every single time (8)

[xxemmziexx]

ive been really stressed today, ive been in a bad mood all day at school. everyones been comming up to me and asking if im alright, but i just want to be left alone. ive had a constant headache all through school and i just cant think straight. i wanted to cry at one point but i held it all back. this is really getting to me. and im stupid cause i havnt done anything about it. i have low self confidence and everything is all adding up and driving me mad.

(8) When you look you see right through me, cut the rope fell to me knees, fallen broken every single time (8)

[batchelor]

Hi - It can be helpful to list everything that bothers you. Thats a good way of starting to get control. One successful thing I do is to write down a short list of things that ARE right and not a problem. Even one thing I am pleased about each day. Could be anything . Keep the short list or note with you during the day, and use it as a sort of affirmation to remind you that not everything is wrong.:D

[xladyjx]

Hi emmzie!

Im no doctor but as a sufferer it does sound like you have OCD hunni!

At least if you go to see the doc you will be able to start getting help and you will be able to stop driving yourself crazy over do i or dont i...

I know its hard to open up to ppl about this but trust me its better than keeping it all bottled up inside which I did for years and it gets easier the more you do it!

I can relate with most of what you said, esp the spider and door thing!!!

Hope to hear from you soon,
Take care

Love Jenny xxxx

[chillx]

Hi

My sister had OCD when she was your age. Her behaviour was very similiar to yours. The good news is she got help, medication and CBT. She is now very well and is no longer on medication.

There are people who understand what you are going through and will help you.

chillx