Unprotected Sex - Anxiety Sky High - Need Some Reassurance / Kind Words

[jso123]

Hi Everyone,

I went on a night out and got really drunk. I think everyone knows where this is going. Basically ended up sleeping with a girl, used a condom at first and then it came off and continued. I am normally really good at staying protected during sex as I know this anxiety issues I have take over my life the next day.

So here I am, had an unprotected roll with a bit of a loose woman and devastated anxiety-wise regarding STD's and HIV. I really hate being this way. I mean I know its good as its a stark reminder to be safe, but I literally sentence myself to shame, worthlessness, self hate and death thoughts. (Not that I am suicidal but just conveying the severity of the feelings).

Anyway I am going to get the tests done asap. I have a few questions. I know 3 months is the limit for HIV test but by getting one done right away, there is still some reassurance I can take from that right? Then look to get another in 3 months?

Secondly if someone can give some reassurance on the likeliness of the worst case scenario happening off a 1 time event, then that would ease my mind.

I have made a decision to cut alcohol out of my life. Not just because of this incident but how it makes me feel the next day generally. So some good has come from this situation...I am just so scared, sad and alone right now.

[annie.hall]

I don't know the the delay you have to wait for HIV to show in tests but I really don't think you contracted it. If you say she's kind of a loose woman, she MAY have HPV, because it's a very common STD. But I think it's highly impossible that you caught it unless there were visible warts... I think the worst case scenario would be HPV and there are many strains of it that are asymptomatic to men. But remember that not everybody has STDs and that the chances are really low since you slept with her only once. Unprotected sex with untrustworthy people is never a good thing, but I don't think you'll make that mistake twice. This doesn't define you as a person anyway. People make mistakes, that's how we learn. Don't be too harsh on yourself, it's not gonna do you any good. I hope you'll be better soon. :)

[ecila92]

It's very difficult to get HIV during sex, unless it's anal. If it's anything, it will just be chlamidia which isn't serious at all. They say you should wait for 3 months, do it to keep yourself from worrying but I think it's unlikely.

[jso123]

Well thank you so much for your replies. It really does help me 'come back to earth'. My head just spins out of control and goes to the worst case all the time. I think everyone can relate to that but when you're here, in that state, its really one of the worst places to be because you're fighting something irrational.

Again I cant explain how much calmer your messages have made me - THANK YOU :)