Antonio68
02-04-13, 11:19
Hi everyone. My name is Antonio Have been suffering from generalised anxiety and panic disorder for few years now. I had a period where I was very well and my anxiety was under control. No panick attacks too. Unfortunately I had a big relapse last two months. I feel like I am feeling worse that when it all began few years back.
I have been to the doctor but I dont want to take any SSRI as I then panic about side effects. I have days where I feel ok but others I feel I lost sanity and I start question If I have svhzzophrenia and paranoia. This is because some of my panick attacs starts from weird thoughts ( no voices as in auditory ) I dont hear voices!! but sometimes some of my thioughts are very scary and angry too like I have a split personality. :weep: It scares me and then I start examining all of my thoughts and think and question why I think this thoughts.
I suffer from fear of not loving my partner anymore. Which its mad as I love him very much and the best thing ever happen to me. I suffer of fear of losing loved ones. I worry a great deal about their safety.
And then to top it all up I scare my self to death with mad thoughts that can be quiet morbid. And they start can you imagine if...
I respond to my thoughts with fear then and my anxiety rises and before I know iot I am in teh vortex of the panic. I feel tearful and scared and that in it self then scares me that I am emotionally instable.
I dunno if to give a try to the SSRI. What do you think? Any suggestion?
The only way I can describe some of my anxiety and the mechanism is this.
I have lots of thiughts like everyone does.. good and bad. anxierty thoughts and angry thoughts. When My anxiety is high I start to give a meaning to all these thoughts and I get transported away from them quiet helplesly. The thoughts sticks and my body tense up. My face looks like I have been hit with a criket bat and I have very dark eyes. I feel exausted and there is no place where I feel comfortable.
Whats happening to me??
As I am writing this I feel tearful. I have a good life. An amazing partner. A good home and a good job. I want to live my life free from this madness.
I want to laugh and feel relaxed and unthreatened from my own mind.
Thank you for listening.
:blush:
I have been to the doctor but I dont want to take any SSRI as I then panic about side effects. I have days where I feel ok but others I feel I lost sanity and I start question If I have svhzzophrenia and paranoia. This is because some of my panick attacs starts from weird thoughts ( no voices as in auditory ) I dont hear voices!! but sometimes some of my thioughts are very scary and angry too like I have a split personality. :weep: It scares me and then I start examining all of my thoughts and think and question why I think this thoughts.
I suffer from fear of not loving my partner anymore. Which its mad as I love him very much and the best thing ever happen to me. I suffer of fear of losing loved ones. I worry a great deal about their safety.
And then to top it all up I scare my self to death with mad thoughts that can be quiet morbid. And they start can you imagine if...
I respond to my thoughts with fear then and my anxiety rises and before I know iot I am in teh vortex of the panic. I feel tearful and scared and that in it self then scares me that I am emotionally instable.
I dunno if to give a try to the SSRI. What do you think? Any suggestion?
The only way I can describe some of my anxiety and the mechanism is this.
I have lots of thiughts like everyone does.. good and bad. anxierty thoughts and angry thoughts. When My anxiety is high I start to give a meaning to all these thoughts and I get transported away from them quiet helplesly. The thoughts sticks and my body tense up. My face looks like I have been hit with a criket bat and I have very dark eyes. I feel exausted and there is no place where I feel comfortable.
Whats happening to me??
As I am writing this I feel tearful. I have a good life. An amazing partner. A good home and a good job. I want to live my life free from this madness.
I want to laugh and feel relaxed and unthreatened from my own mind.
Thank you for listening.
:blush: