feeling down about missing so much work!

[missacorah]

I am feeling a bit down today as last night I had a call from a woman at work who 'kindly' informed me what some of the people at my work have been saying questioning my illness.

This one woman, I mistakenly trusted to tell about my panic attacks, as I was working alongside her and felt I had to explain myself at one point, had apparently gone round saying that although my doctor has written 'viral illness' on my medical note I am actually suffering from panic attacks and not that. That is not the sort of info I really want going round about me as it is something I do not feel everybody at my place of work needs to know about me.

I cant deny it when I get back either as some people do know it happens to be true.Feel really low that there are people like this. I went out of my way to help this woman when she had to take time off to nurse her sick husband and this is how I am repaid - nice! I dont feel I can ever face going back there.

I have been suffering with a bug since Friday, having severe headaches and being sick etc and was really concerned it was something serious and was just starting to feel better after hearing many people in my local area had been suffering a very similar thing so it wasnt just me and now this. It feels like every time I pass one thing another leaps out to stop me.I am starting to wonder what on earth I have ever done to deserve this. Sorry at the depressing nature of my post - just had to let it out.

[hayles]

Ahhhh. Sorry to hear you are having a low moment.

Dont listen to people at work. Until you have experienced panic first hand, you can never get your head round it!!
Ignorance is sometimes bliss, but can be frustrating for us!!!

Hang in there. There is nothing to be ashamed of. When you are ready return to work return with your head held high.....

Keep smiling or in some cases start smiling!!!!

Hay x

[susie]

some people are so awfull dont take any notice when you are well go back with your head held high you have nothing to be ashamed of .i have become friendly with people in the past untill they found out about my problems then they shyed way , its thier lose not mine true friends will stick by you no matter what so dont be upset , chin up love hope you soon get better luv suexxx

[**whenwillthisend**]

Do you know there is so many people off work for months..not days or weeks with stress related illness such as anxiety...when i was doing my nurse training i couldnt believe the amount of staff off with long term stress...it is nothing to do with anyone except yourself and maybe your boss..who will probably question your absence....you need to take as much time off as you need...i hope you feel better soon....
take carex

[carly123]

Women are bitches.

Sorry to be blunt, but it's true. I worked in a job for five years and the main reason I stayed there was because I had great relationships with colleagues. Then I was promoted, but had to take time off due to panic attacks, and suddenly half of them stabbed me in the back to my boss, who then proceeded to 'invite me to leave'.

Yes I am still bitter about it but thats cos I regret what I did- I left. When I should have stayed and fought my corner.

SO DON'T MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE. If you enjoy your job, keep your bosses posted and nobody else!

Try not to take it to heart, you get this sort of behaviour anywhere women are working together.

Good luck...hope you feel better soon.xx

[Piglet]

I think you should tell that person how disappointed you are in her, as you had thought she would have appreciated that it was a private conversation.

Better to be you hun with your panic attacks, than a big gobbed clod with no sense of discretion!!!!!

Rise above it and remember you are a special unique person and learn to value all the strengths you have.

Love Piglet xx

"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.

[yorkylover]

Hi there,sorry your having such a bad day,me to.I agree with Carly women can be so bitchy.No one understands anxiety and panic unless they have been there.It is hard to walk back into work knowing you have been talked about,but if you like your job dont let them get the better of you.I left a job I loved because of certain people,I still regret it now.Hayles is right you have nothing to be ashamed of,its an illness.
Take care.:)

Ellen XX

[missacorah]

Thanks for all your kind words. Its such a horrible feeling.
Piglet - you made me laugh and I am now just referring to her merely as ' the clod' lol

[juju]

what a spiteful cow, sorry, i had to say this, tell her what you think of her and when you go back lift that head up high.
take care
julie

we are all stronger people after having this

[Lenny]

You know they are all right! Women can be so bitchy! No one neds to know about the anxiety unless you feel like telling them, so tell them that she is wrong! I would! I have ben trying to avoid work for two weeks and have had to go back for the last eight days, It has been really tough and I have no intention of every telling you it is easy but don't avoid, if you can even do a few hours that is something.you will see soon it is not the job but the idea ! You can do this!!!! This is from someone who really really struggles!!!

[missacorah]

Thank you. I feel that I do need to confront this woman if and when i return to work for my own self respect.

She is one of these women who will insult you till you cant believe it but then add the word 'mate' or 'treasure' on the end so you cant really bite back!lol!

I know when i go in the staff room she will be all 'hello my treasure come and sit with me, how are you?' etc. But I have decided I will say 'I am fine thank you, and by the way you were incorrect in your diagnosis doctor, so perhaps you could correct the rumours you have spread' I feel its important to say how I feel in front of the people she has gossiped to as otherwise there will be a whole other load of rubbish going round!

[Piglet]

Try saying 'big gobbed clod' when you have a mouth full of rice that should do the job nicely - she'll be getting the rice out of her eyes and hair for weeks!! I've just ruined a perfectly good keyboard trying it!

I have to say I don't know where that came from - I've never used the word clod in my life - I prefer to go straight for the hard stuff [}:)];)

Love Piglet xx

"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.

[carly123]

I think that sounds like a good response to use hun.

Remember after a few days it will have all been forgotten about. The first day back is always the hardest, as you don't know what peoples reactions will be, or what they'll ask you. But then the second day they can't say anything even if they want to cos it's too late.

If that makes any sense[Duh!]

[Insomniac]

Sorry to hear about that person. (I can't write here what I really feel.) She sounds just like the sort of person who I had to work closely with in one of the other schools where I worked.

My husband says he thinks they were a big part in starting my anxiety, and I think he's right. Being undermined by people like that when you really need support and understanding. I suppose it really shows their lack of confidence in themselves that they feel they must undermine you to make themselves look good.

Try to rise above it. Calmly telling this person how disappointed you are that theybetrayed your trust is a good idea. She will know she has done the wrong thing. Doing this calmly is so much more effective. You will show yourself as a reliable, steady person, rather than whatever this person is trying to make out.

Take heart though, even if everyone does know now, and the ones who are decent people will support you, however much they really know about this illness.

((hug))

Lisa.

[Lindalou64]

First i have to say its not just women who gossip....but this women had no right to open her mouth about your situation....and no one can understand unless they have one ..........its easy to say to you not to worry what they say cause i believe we all do when it comes down to what we have..like we really love to have this and it does make ya feel like chit when someone says a comment about it.....but we have to learn not to let them get to us........do we gossip if someone was diabetic and ect......noooooooo...like someone said hold ya head high and tell this women you didnt appreciate her telling everyone......or ya can be a smart ass like me and say im so glad i could give you all cheap entertainment would u like an encore..lol.....no.... ya have to laugh at somethings tho best medicine there is...wish ya all the best.go get em...........Linda [8D]

[missacorah]

Thank you. I will keep you all informed on how 'clod' is dealt with if and when I manage to get back to work! You are right, I must say the things I want to in a calm manner otherwise as soon as I have finished saying my piece she'll be like 'see, told ya she was mad. She's unhinged!!!' lol. I cant win!!!

xxx