Very very anxious right now

[jayjoe18]

Hi all, not sure what the point in this post is but just need somewhere to write really. I have a really challenging weekend ahead, we have someone coming to stay tonight from out of town and I'm really anxious about it. It's also my birthday tomorrow (which is always hard on it's own) and I have to face social situations with family coming round, being centre of attention etc. On Saturday there is a big charity event also that I want to be a part of but I'm really struggling with the idea of it. It's not helping that all these plans are up in the air, like I don't know exact times when things will be happening, people tend to turn up when they want on birthdays which increases my anxiety. The person coming to stay hasn't said how long either, I'm saying just the one night to make myself feel better but who knows, it could even be two nights :weep: I'm feeling so anxious, my breathing is all over the place, I feel like my heart is beating faster and I just feel that anxious anticipation all the time, I feel sick. I can't settle, my mind is racing so much! It doesn't help as I've also not been sleeping because I'm worrying about all this. I just wish it wasn't so difficult! I feel bad for feeling this way though when facing this charity event (the girl is terminally ill and I'm angry at myself for feeling this way because I know there are a lot of people out there suffering so much more) Arggghhhhh, really don't know what to do :weep:

[jackie13]

Hi Hun

Sorry to hear that you are not too well:)

Try and break it down into small chunks, Saturday is not here yet. Just concentrate on your friend staying tonight, it will be fine once they are there, can you just limit them to one night?

Yes birthdays are a bit funny at times, does your family know of your anxiety? Try and get through these 2 events and you will feel on top of the world that you have achieved and you will look forward to Saturday. Take things easy be kind to yourself.

Jackie xx

[shakey1961]

First of all, Happy Birthday. Enjoy your birthday.

Secondly, who would be able to cope with everything all at once? No-one can, so take it one event at a time. Your friend who is staying is not expecting to be waited on hand and foot. The charity event is something you can cope with at the time. It's not happened yet so you can't cope with it.

It's not like you're going to the dentist or having an operation or going to court, those are things to worry about because they're out of your control. This is in your control.

Anyway, if you can't cope, then don't do something and tell the truth why you can't do it.

As for the terminally ill girl, I'm sure she has support from a lot of people (including you) so she's taken care of, probably far better than you are. Our own problems seem big enough for us to cope with without trying to worry about others.

So, look after yourself stay calm, do one thing at a time.

[Col]

Hi jayjoe - yep birthdays are tricky buisness with families! I've got kids so it's sooo hard & my parents frankly despise each other so although different to you I know what birthdays with family can be like when you feel like your dying , anxious , short of breath! The guest you've got coming over i think wouldn't be as much of an issue BUT because your weekend is full on everything seems mammoth!


Try tapping exercises you tube and music anything to take your mind of stuff and kind of, let this week end wash over you.

Take care

[jayjoe18]

Thanks everyone, that really helps. I'm trying to take things one at a time but my mind keeps rushing ahead, I think there's just too much going on at once for me (my normal life consists of staying in the house, going nowhere and not seeing many people!) The person staying is not my friend, she's a friend of my mums so I have no control of how long she stays and I think she might be here until TUESDAY!!!! I can't deal with this! I really can't! I'm in full panic mode right now, I'm shaking, I can't even escape because my anxiety is so bad that I can't go out :weep::weep::weep:

[shakey1961]

I was told a little trick. Stand still and make sure no-one is around and shout "STOP" as if you're telling a child to stop who was running out in front of a car. Makes your brain stop and take stock of the situation!

Stop worrying about your Mum's friend, she big enough and ugly enough to take care of herself. Just be civil and welcome her but you're not putting on a banquet for her.

Want to know what I've got to cope with? I play in a local orchestra. I've got to practice my music, I've just designed the tickets and poster for the advertising which has just gone to a commercial printer, I have to design and put the programme together. I'm on the committee and we have a meeting for that next Monday, Tuesday night rehearsal again. In constant contact with our conductor about finances. We are working with a budget into the thousands of pounds!!! But we'll be making a profit for the Orchestra of over £3000! Scary stuff!

Then on 22 June I'll be playing in a concert featuring a choir doing music from Movies and Musicals with an audience of 750 people including our local MP and the Mayor.

And I'm thoroughly looking forward to it.

Calm down. its just a few days with a few people. Certainly not 750!!!!

If you're in the north of England I'd love to see you at our concert!!

[littleme92]

I know how overwhelmed you feel when so many things are happening at once and your mind keeps racing, trust me you're not alone. :)

If it helps try to take one day at a time and if your family friend is staying until Tuesday, just remember they won't be staying forever and your anxiety can't harm you! I'm not good at giving advice sorry

Do you have anything that could help take your mind off it, listening to music for example?

[jayjoe18]

I know how overwhelmed you feel when so many things are happening at once and your mind keeps racing, trust me you're not alone. :)

If it helps try to take one day at a time and if your family friend is staying until Tuesday, just remember they won't be staying forever and your anxiety can't harm you! I'm not good at giving advice sorry

Do you have anything that could help take your mind off it, listening to music for example?

Thank you very much for this, really helped! Well it's Friday evening and she's still here! Hmmm, looks like a long stay but it's slowly getting easier, just taking it a day at a time, will be glad to get my space back though!! :)

Stop worrying about your Mum's friend, she big enough and ugly enough to take care of herself. Just be civil and welcome her but you're not putting on a banquet for her.


Hahaha oh this really helped Shakey, thank you!!!
750 people would send me in a spin, your super brave! Hope it all goes well for you! :)