Are all bosses the same ? [Archive]

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Kobey

12-04-13, 19:15

Tessar

12-04-13, 21:12

They are definitely treating you badly, there's no doubt about it. One of my colleagues had a week off with something similar recently and they got sympathy not in your face aggression. I don't like it when bosses are like this, you'd think they would realise tat u get much more out of staff by treating them with respect... Then the workforce is happier all round. Perhaps I should come and breath my germs all over your boss and see how much they like it... (I've got a cold coming & am at the infectious stage I would think, tell me where to find them and I'll be on my way, haa haa).
But seriously it does appear they don't understand how to get the best out of people.

Kobey

12-04-13, 22:37

Hehe, that would be funny. I just feel I'm stuck in a rut with this job, no pay rise in 7 years and then they stop sick pay. I'm scared to leave because of my anxiety situation. :-(.

mrsnobody

12-04-13, 22:47

they shouldnt be treating you bad, they should be understanding of your needs and support you

Tessar

13-04-13, 15:43

Hehe, that would be funny. I just feel I'm stuck in a rut with this job, no pay rise in 7 years and then they stop sick pay. I'm scared to leave because of my anxiety situation. :-(.

Sounds to me like they are taking advantage.

i recall when stuck in a job where I was treated badly (bullied amongst other things) that this coincided with me doing therapy including CBT. One time when my boss had pretty much done a character assassination on me in a review, My therapist said to me (in relation to how important this job was to me) "what is he worst that can happen?" To which I replied "I lose my job".
She helped me see that even if the worst happened (probably unlikely even though I feared it) well, I could find another job. This job wasn't the be all and end all in my life. I had worked hard there for years & always hoped one day my boss would show me respect. My therapist also helped me see that my boss was a poisonous character & it was unlikely he was ever going to give me the approval I so wanted.
Once I made these realisations, I must say I did feel better about the job. I realised my boss did not have "something on me". If anything it was the other way round. He owed me. I began to discount his unhelpful comments and attitude in my mind and realise he was using me to boost his own pathetic little ego.
He was very weak at heart, maybe your boss is too and that is why they go on at you so much so they look good. Also if u r the only skilled worker, although they won't admit it to you, I bet after the length of time u have been there, they would miss your input and hard work but no way ever would they admit that. No instead they go on at you unfairly.
I don't know if this rings true but if its anything like it was for me then it will,
Out if interest, I h
Got made redundant. I now have a lovely job I enjoy. Lovely bosses too. Maybe a change of jobs would be good for you. U can always take a look as there is never any obligation to move but just looking can be good for you. Actually that was another suggestion that I try when I was in therapy and yes it helped me see (after a couple of interviews) that I was good at my job.
Good luck to you I say & just remember that boss is poison to your mind!!!

Iced_diamond

14-04-13, 18:44

My sympathy goes out to you. It's bad enough feeling rotten as it is without having someone guilt tripping you and making you feel unhappy and awkward. A person can't be well 365 days a year. Everyone comes down with something, somewhen. Rest is important and people who rush back to work when they still feel unwell not only elongates the illness, but also carries the risk of passing it on. This should be in nobody's interest! Bosses can sometimes be sooo narrow minded and only think about the work and not the employee. I'm sorry to hear you are not getting the understanding you should, especially seeing as you are a loyal employee. I would try and see past what your boss has said, take care of yourself and make getting better your priority. Once you're well and back at work, this won't be an issue anymore anyway. The work won't run away after all. :) Take care and get well soon! :)

Tessar

21-04-13, 19:02

Hello Kobey, I am interested to know how you got on and if you are feeling better now?

Chester

22-04-13, 16:19

So I have been off work since Tuesday which I can only describe as a flu or viral bug. Shivers, sore throat, headaches etc. I rang in yesterday and said I wouldn't be in for the rest of the week die to this bug. Response was as always stroppy, followed by a text later that day saying to bring a sick note in when I return. I had a rocky year last year through anxiety and illness and they stopped my sick pay. I am the only skilled employee they have and have been there for 15 years. Am I wrong in thinking they are treating me like shit ? It's certainly not helping my anxiety at all.

First off Kobey, you don't need a sicknote for 7 days, you can self certify, no matter what they try to tell you.

Sick pay wise, your employer can't stop sick pay (SSP) unless you've gone over the 28 week limit they pay up to but they can stop their own version of sick pay. If they do this, they still have to offer SSP. I'd check your contract/handbook if you have one.

They are treating you differently but be aware of YOUR rights. Most of us in the community in the UK will be covered by the DDA.

If you find yourself being pushed around perhaps give MIND, Anxiety UK or the Citizens Advice Bureau a call, I'd hate to see this turn into a constructive dismissal case for you, but equally, you should be prepared and no matter how rubbish you feel, fight for your rights!