Depression???

[Steve37]

I get moments of feeling great, then really really low moments. Where i want to harm/cut myself. What is this? Anyone know?

[NoPoet]

Mood changes, also known as cyclic mood, or possibly dysthymia.

Dysthymia is like having the "shadow" of depression, without being diagnosable as clinically depressed. Some or all of the symptoms can appear and you can go for periods of time without having any.

You could also be on the bipolar spectrum, which does not mean you must be bipolar. Your personality style might be inclined towards broad mood changes. It may be something to do with brain chemistry. It could also be to do with the way you perceive yourself, or maybe you are being triggered by life events.

When you're in a down phase, you may see everything in a hopeless light and view yourself as worthless. These negative beliefs are being triggered by something - some random thought or memory, or something that's going on in your life.

Hopelessness and worthlessness are symptoms of depression. They do not mean you actually are worthless, or that there isn't any hope. Depression cannot change reality, so it biases you against reality.

When you are not depressed, you are not looking at life through that bias, which is why you do not want to hurt yourself and you may be able to experience hope and happiness. In the absence of depression, you can see life as it actually is, which is why your spirits lift and you can get on with life.

EDIT:

Whatever the reasons you became vulnerable to depression, in the here and now there are things triggering each bout. Keep a thought diary, especially when you're having a blip. Write down the things you were thinking and doing before, at the beginning of and during a depressive blip. Also write down a list of things that were happening in your life. This will very quickly start showing the same triggers, which gives you a way to break up the cycle of mood changes.

This is your task if you wish to grow as a person and enjoy the rest of your life. It can be done, there is no reason whatsoever to doubt you can make it, it would not have been sent to you if there wasn't a part of you that was capable of beating it.

[Steve37]

Mood changes, also known as cyclic mood, or possibly dysthymia.

Dysthymia is like having the "shadow" of depression, without being diagnosable as clinically depressed. Some or all of the symptoms can appear and you can go for periods of time without having any.

You could also be on the bipolar spectrum, which does not mean you must be bipolar. Your personality style might be inclined towards broad mood changes. It may be something to do with brain chemistry. It could also be to do with the way you perceive yourself, or maybe you are being triggered by life events.

When you're in a down phase, you may see everything in a hopeless light and view yourself as worthless. These negative beliefs are being triggered by something - some random thought or memory, or something that's going on in your life.

Hopelessness and worthlessness are symptoms of depression. They do not mean you actually are worthless, or that there isn't any hope. Depression cannot change reality, so it biases you against reality.

When you are not depressed, you are not looking at life through that bias, which is why you do not want to hurt yourself and you may be able to experience hope and happiness. In the absence of depression, you can see life as it actually is, which is why your spirits lift and you can get on with life.

EDIT:

Whatever the reasons you became vulnerable to depression, in the here and now there are things triggering each bout. Keep a thought diary, especially when you're having a blip. Write down the things you were thinking and doing before, at the beginning of and during a depressive blip. Also write down a list of things that were happening in your life. This will very quickly start showing the same triggers, which gives you a way to break up the cycle of mood changes.

This is your task if you wish to grow as a person and enjoy the rest of your life. It can be done, there is no reason whatsoever to doubt you can make it, it would not have been sent to you if there wasn't a part of you that was capable of beating it.

Great way of putting it, i have a better understanding now!:D I get still get the very low and high points though.