Don't know what to be most scared of...

[carly123]

... everythings gone wrong.

My partner went off on one last night so I kicked him out. Then he came back this morning threatening me with all sorts (including 'I'll get the kids taken away from you' amongst other things).
I've got to find my rent money of £75 TODAY, plus I need gas and electric but all I've got is £5.
I've now got to find £100 council tax next week too, something he's supposed to pay.
On top of all that I've got stuff to sort out with tax credits that I keep putting off, cos I'm woried they'll say I've been overpaid or worse that I'm not entitled to it any more (I've been working self employed but I haven't earnt anything yet!)

So with all that I am panicking but worst of all I just haven't got a clue what to do or where to start cos I'm completely spaced out.

And I'm already worrying about tonight cos I hate being in the house alone.

I feel really scared but I can't put my finger on what, exactly, it just feels like I'm going mad.

[PITITA]

I'd love to say that I have all the answers for you, but unfortunately I don't, saying that though I can reassure you that I can relate to the feeling of going mad you are describing. It always happens to me as well, that just when I am the most anxious anyway something BIG always happen on top of that. I know its not relevant but like the other day I was getting ready to go and see a hypnotherapist for the first time, and just when I was about to go out the phone rang and my mum called crying saying my Dad has one of his " fits" again where he is threatening to kill her ( he is an alcoholic), and I was just there thinking...jeez I really don't need this right now, but she passed on the phone to him and he said some really horrible things to me so I slammed the phone down on him...then I realized I was gonna be late for my appointment which was £80 and started crying why this was happening to me..then I rushed to the place on the tube and was a bit late, but I still got the most out of it. But had I not been so stressed out previously I could have probably enjoy the relaxation more...etc. And since then I am feeling just like you...spaced out and still anxious...:(

I guess my reply has not been very helpful to you, but at least you know you are not alone feeling this way :(

Something that always helps me when I feel like this is a nice big walk in the park and a big cup of chamomile tea afterwards, nice hot shower.

Sometimes especially money issues have a way of sorting themselves out somehow. I hope things will get better for you soon! xxx

"Our thinking creates problems that the same type of thinking will not solve" Albert Einstein

[kazzie]

Hi Carly, first of all you need to take a deep breath! Get the phone book and find the number for either citizens advice or gingerbread and ring them for advice. The council tax people will understand if you are sorting your finances out just explain it to them. On the subject of the rent is your landlord private or council? Either way you need to tell them whats happened. Dont panic about it if you explain to people the problems they will understand. Hope this will help. PM me if you like.
Take Care luv Kaz x

[yorkylover]

Hi carly,totally agree with Kazzie,take one thing at a time people will understand,and help you.Try not to panic,easier said than done I know.
Things will get sorted pet.
Take care

Ellen XX

[carly123]

Thank you guys

I am trying to do what you say taking things one at atime. But the most I've managed to do so far is ring social services and asked them if I can speak to someone cos I want to cover my back with regards to the kids. I know it sounds daft but you hear about people that get their kids taken away on the strength of false complaints and what if...?
The main thing is I just can't focus at the moment and I'm one of these people that has to have control and know exactly whats happening and when and how... I need direction and routine and it feels like thats slipping away, if you know what I mean?
And I'm panicking about chest pains now cos I keep getting them....
God its neverending

[Insomniac]

Hi Carly.

You're coping with so much, anyone would be anxious. The chest pains are because of tension and worry. Try some breathing exercises. Its hard to concentrate on I know, sometimes you really have to stick with it. Or keep doing the exercises when it comes back, but it DOES help.

The Citizens Advice Bureau are great, really helpful. My sister in law is a social worker, so I can tell you they're not all bad. But of course you only ever hear the bad stuff, they are there to help too.

If you kids are quite young you may find your health visitor might advise you. Mine was great when my daughter was little and I had money problems.

Hope this helps. Hang in there. You may not feel it but you're doing well.

Lisa.