Any advice please? Really upset at the moment

[GirlAfraid23]

Hi guys.
I have been trying to contact a close friend for a couple of weeks now. She hasn't got back to me and I have text/rang her a few times about meeting up etc.
I sent a few fb messages, and it comes up as 'seen' when somebody has read it. This has happened yet she hasnt replied.
Its really worrying me and I am paranoid that I have done something wrong
What advice would you give?

[swgrl09]

That sounds difficult, but try (as hard as it is) to not take it personally. Maybe she is going through something really hard for her right now and is not up for chatting. I know I have gone for weeks without wanting to talk to my friends when I was depressed and it was nothing against them personally.

Just let her know you are there for her if she needs anything and to talk when she is ready.

[Annie0904]

Why don't you send a message asking if you have done something to upset her and see if she tells you? Do you have any mutual friends who may know anything about why she isn't replying? xx

[GirlAfraid23]

There are mutual friends but I literally cannot think of anything I've done wrong.
I am supposed to be seeing her saturday for a party and I'm worried it will be awkward now.
We have been friends for years so don't understand what is going on now.

[Annie0904]

Like swgrl said it could just be that she has been really busy or has something on her mind (nothing related to you) and she just needs some time out. Send her another message and ask if everything is ok still for the party. I hope you hear from her soon xx

[GirlAfraid23]

I don't want to seem too needy thats all.
I hate looking like the needy one :-( the one doing all the chasing.

---------- Post added at 21:31 ---------- Previous post was at 19:53 ----------


That sounds difficult, but try (as hard as it is) to not take it personally. Maybe she is going through something really hard for her right now and is not up for chatting. I know I have gone for weeks without wanting to talk to my friends when I was depressed and it was nothing against them personally.

Just let her know you are there for her if she needs anything and to talk when she is ready.

That would be ok but usually, and in the past she would contact me to talk through anything that is wrong. I am thinking of not going to the party saturday now.

[Annie0904]

Don't avoid going. You will have other friends there? and it may be a good opportunity for you to talk to your friend.

[GirlAfraid23]

Im anxious about the confrontation if there is one.

[Sparkle1984]

I think you should still go to the party. I had a similar situation a few years ago when a former work colleague removed me from his Facebook friends, but he had already invited me to his leaving party. I thought that maybe I shouldn't go to the party as he'd deleted me from his Facebook friends and that maybe he didn't really want me there after all. But when I went along to the party, he was fine with me. It was probably just that he wasn't comfortable with having too many friends on Facebook that he doesn't know really well.

[k1982]

I think you should go to the party, and be as friendly as you can be. Chances are there will not be a confrontation, try not to think too far ahead to things that probably won't even happen! I'm had similar situations before, and it's turned out that the friend wasn't mad at me, but had their own issues or things they were trying to work through. Hope the party goes OK, will be thinking of you.

xx

[GirlAfraid23]

Thanks to everyone for their advice.
I feel like I am always playing the victim and thinking I've done something wrong.
I actually sent her a message last night saying I hope I havent upset her or something.
It has come up as read on my messsges which means she has seen it.
Surely she would tell me then if there was something wrong as I have asked her out right.
I really dont know whats going on and the not knowing is making my anxiety worse.
I didnt sleep well last night because of it and I am exhausted today at work.
Now dreading tomorrow.

---------- Post added at 11:24 ---------- Previous post was at 11:22 ----------

This is probably the longest ive ever gone without talking to her.