Last straw.

[Mr.Nobody]

Hi. Im 27, and i have suffered with axiety and depression since my mid teens.

I joined this forum in a last ditch attempt to save myself from myself as i feel i'm losing control and to get some advice on how to regain stability. Not only just for me but for my family as i am a father of two young children and a partner to a loving fiance.

I really don't know how much longer i can deal with this life as i find myself more and more disconnected from it.

Thanks

Mr.Nobody

[SeroxVet]

Hi Mr Nobody

Have you ever tried to get help? How have you coped so far? I, like you, began suffering in my mid teens and was about your age now, 27, when things really started to get out of control. It was only then I actually went to the doctor about it. I'm 45 now.

[Mr.Nobody]

Hey SeroxVet, I have mainly coped by isolating myself from others which really dosent fit in with being a dad. I also calm myself down using cannabis. I also find it helps to removes me from the current situation. I know this isnt great but i would rather do that than use something else like alcohol or harder drugs. I personaly see it as a lesser of the evils and i hope not to use it in the future.

As for medical treatment i have seen various therapists and i have been on various anti-depressants but never found the right one for me. At one point it was thought that i had bipolar disorder but after further investigation it was desided that i didn't and that it was maybe to do with my day to day routines and was advised to see a cognative therapist. I am currently booked in the see a cognative behavioural therapist in a couple of weeks.

[Annie0904]

Hi :welcome: I hope that the CBT will help you.

[Mr.Nobody]

Hi and thanks. I hope so too.

[SeroxVet]

Hi Mr Nobody

You're certainly doing the right thing by getting some cognitive behavioural therapy. It has very good results; I'm trying to get some myself. I'm reading a book called Mind Over Mood which is a sort of CBT manual with exercises in it which help you change the way you think. It makes a lot sense IMO.

You say you've coped by isolating yourself from others. Does that mean you haven't been able to work/study etc? I've never been a regular user of cannabis, but I guess it is preferable to harder drugs or drinking too much. However, it is well known that cannabis - even more so than some harder drugs - can cause anxiety, paranoia, panic attacks etc, one of the reasons I never saw it as something I would rely on. I think if you are prone to anxiety/depression it might be doing you more harm than good. It may calm you down when you use it but then making you more anxious at other times. I don't know what sort of state you're in but it sounds pretty bad, and I'm just wondering if you will get the best out of the CBT if you are very depressed and anxious. Quite a lot of people have benefitted from being on the right meds and getting CBT. Then once they have improved they find they can come off the meds as the CBT has given them the tools to be able to handle their anxiety/depression and help them start reconnecting with the world. You might want to discuss this possibility with the therapist.

[ChristopherT]

Hi there Mr.
Seems like you have a lot going for you, with two kids and a loving partner. I have friends who use canabis to calm down, and I can understand that it does that, but if you are getting anxiety and depression, you should probably talk to a doctor about getting proper meds. I've started Prozac, Fluoxetine, and I think it seems like it really helps with Anxiety and depression as far as I can tell. I felt it was kind of an impossible battle, i would use cigarettes, and a beer or two if I needed to calm down... More recently I was very anxious, and a friend gave me Canabis, it relaxed me then... But I thought the weeks after if anything I was getting worse. I think if you feel like this, and you are looking to stop using Canabis in the long run, this may be the way forward, or something similar.

[superwoman]

Hi mr.nobody (which by the way you are not!).

Im sorry to hear about your current situation. I can understand the feelings you have at the moment. I was in the same place about 2 years ago. It was my darkest time and it was not nice! I too am mother to 1 four year old and was planning my wedding at the time. I went back on medication then which has helped. I take prozac-fluoxetine now. I also now go to cbt which is helping. Have you considered seeking help? You have a lot to live for, 2 children and a loving partner! There is help out there and even talking with your doctor he/she should send you in the right direction depending on your needs. I never thought i would surface from that time and i felt totally disconnected from the world, even from my child. But i am in a better place now amd coping well so please believe that you can too. And one day it does get better! Please think about seeking help,

[RAG]

Hello
I smoked cannabis every night for over 10 years on and off. At the time, I loved smoking it! I've been off it now for about a year and I now feel it actually did me more harm then good. An occasional J once in a while is probably harmless, but to smoke it everyday and become dependant (in my experience) is not a good thing. Therapy is much better! Medication is much better! I've been seeing a psychotherapist for 6 months and he's much better then cannabis, I also started taking Fluoxetine 4 days ago. I am determined to beat my anxiety and depression, step by step. And you WILL too! Keep talking and seek help.
Best of luck :)