Gazzalee123
09-05-13, 20:14
Scared of dying !!
Scared I am dying !!
Super aware , super sensitive and aware of every heart beat , pulse , twinge , twitch , ache and pain !!
Digestion up the spout through worry ..
Moody , aggressive , snappy and short tempered as a result ...
Back pain equals lung problems
Arm pain equals heart attack or blood clot .. Headache equals brain tumour .. Am I a hypochondriac ??
How long do you leave these pains before getting them checked will that be too late .. What if I dismiss a pain and it's a signal of something serious and I cast it off as anxiety , indigestion or migraine ... I think I just need my mind put at ease .. Someone to say I'm am expert I have never been wrong ... I'm going to take a personal interest in you and test you for everything going to scan your body and look at everything .. I will find what's wrong !! That's all I need .. Instead I was diagnosed with m.e
(Cfs) which is even worse .. The only way to diagnose it through a process of elimination there is not test that sets it in stone .. I did get better dismissing every problem or pain I had as a symptom of m.e but now cause there is no way of diagnosing it for sure it's in my mind that they missed something .. There is something serious underlying .. Something that is wrong .. A reason for the pains I feel .. My mind set my depression .. I'm caught in a circle of shit and at time I break it and feel better not a worry in the world then a set back kicks me straight back in that evil circle ...
I know all the answers I know what it is and not to worry .. I'm ok .. I'm always ok in the end .. It's my anxiety it's worry and stress it's all In my mind .. But what if it isn't ?? Then I guess I die .. Sometime I wonder if it would be easier to just die than live life waiting for it .. I need help .. But don't know where to look ..I can't see how they will help me ?? I feel alone and scared , depressed and down I feel stupid , silly and a little crazy ..
I feel ok in the mornings and it gets worse through the day .. Night is long and lonely it when I feel my worst !!
I find myself just want to to constantly sleep as it a period of time where worry drifts to one side and I dream of a life I once had .. No worry .. No stress .. No depression and anxiety ... Not scared of dying ..
Scared I am dying !!
Super aware , super sensitive and aware of every heart beat , pulse , twinge , twitch , ache and pain !!
Digestion up the spout through worry ..
Moody , aggressive , snappy and short tempered as a result ...
Back pain equals lung problems
Arm pain equals heart attack or blood clot .. Headache equals brain tumour .. Am I a hypochondriac ??
How long do you leave these pains before getting them checked will that be too late .. What if I dismiss a pain and it's a signal of something serious and I cast it off as anxiety , indigestion or migraine ... I think I just need my mind put at ease .. Someone to say I'm am expert I have never been wrong ... I'm going to take a personal interest in you and test you for everything going to scan your body and look at everything .. I will find what's wrong !! That's all I need .. Instead I was diagnosed with m.e
(Cfs) which is even worse .. The only way to diagnose it through a process of elimination there is not test that sets it in stone .. I did get better dismissing every problem or pain I had as a symptom of m.e but now cause there is no way of diagnosing it for sure it's in my mind that they missed something .. There is something serious underlying .. Something that is wrong .. A reason for the pains I feel .. My mind set my depression .. I'm caught in a circle of shit and at time I break it and feel better not a worry in the world then a set back kicks me straight back in that evil circle ...
I know all the answers I know what it is and not to worry .. I'm ok .. I'm always ok in the end .. It's my anxiety it's worry and stress it's all In my mind .. But what if it isn't ?? Then I guess I die .. Sometime I wonder if it would be easier to just die than live life waiting for it .. I need help .. But don't know where to look ..I can't see how they will help me ?? I feel alone and scared , depressed and down I feel stupid , silly and a little crazy ..
I feel ok in the mornings and it gets worse through the day .. Night is long and lonely it when I feel my worst !!
I find myself just want to to constantly sleep as it a period of time where worry drifts to one side and I dream of a life I once had .. No worry .. No stress .. No depression and anxiety ... Not scared of dying ..